Road House

It was the Summer of 1989. The biggest movies in Hollywood's arsenal, all in one fiery season: "Batman", "Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade", "Ghostbusters II", "Lethal Weapon 2", "Star Trek V", "License to Kill" and .... "Road House"? You read that right.

Patrick Swayze stars as Dalton, the (second) best cooler in the business, who's charged with cleaning up The Double Deuce, the seediest honky-tonk bar in Jasper, MO. But things don't go so smoothly when Dalton crosses the town's self-appointed ruler, Brad Wesley (Ben Gazzara, better known as Evil Ben Gazzara). He's paid off the Sheriff, so Evil Ben Gazzara is pretty much the town's law and order. He's not pleased with the Double Deuce's burgeoning prosperity, so he makes things tricky for Dalton. But as we learned in "Dirty Dancing", nobody puts Dalton in the corner.

Fifteen minutes into the film, it becomes obvious (by just the dialogue) that this is a tongue-in-cheek enterprise. Any illusions that this will be a thought-provoking story about a philosophical bouncer in a rough town go right out the window (average viewer: "well, this oughta be a fun ride!"). Even Swayze (behind that cool stare) knows this movie is ridiculous - and that's exactly where the entertainment value kicks into high gear.

Consider what this film has going for it:

• Swayze at his sinewy, mulleted peak

• Bar fights

• Monster trucks

• A gaggle of shapely ladies

• Steamy farmhouse sex

• Sam Elliott

• Shootouts

• Sweaty martial arts

• Male bonding that borders on homoerotic

• Crackling dialogue ("Do you enjoy pain?" ... "Pain don't hurt")

• Stuffed polar bear attacks

The entertainment value of "Road House" is simply off the charts. Where else would you find a bouncer with an NYU degree (in philosophy!) and the brooding intensity to nail the town doctor (the smoldering Kelly Lynch) AND forcefully remove a man's throat from his neck? Nowhere, sir! It is escapist entertainment of the highest order, in all its gratuitous violence.

And let us not criticize the film's message. If you have feet and fists of fury, you CAN conquer a small town in Midwestern America. But simply putting a man through a table or a window is not enough. I would say maybe ten or fifteen should do it.

I do have one beef. For a movie to feature Keith David in the opening credits, and only give that man one speaking line is morally reprehensible. But there were boobies, so I think we can let this one slide.

7.5/10

Released last month as a Deluxe Edition DVD, ROAD HOUSE is a film that is almost impossible to ignore. Whether considered good or bad, it is one of the few pictures that is easy to watch all the way through by almost any one who comes across it. It is a rare gem. The phrase "it's so bad that it's good" doesn't apply to ROAD HOUSE. It isn't so bad it's good, it's so bad it's great. It is the very definition of a guy movie. It contains brutal and bloody fist fights, frequent nudity, a rock n' roll sound track, some of the best cheesy dialogue ever written, fancy cars, gun-play, knives being thrown, and explosions. As a movie for guys, it's a 10, as a movie to be taken seriously, it's a 5. Every attempt at drama flounders, though it never completely ruins what is going on.

Although considered a box office failure when released in 1989, ROAD HOUSE quickly became a cult hit once it reached video. Finally giving in to the cult mania, MGM's new DVD version of ROAD HOUSE contains two commentaries: one from director Rowdy Herrington and one by filmmakers Kevin Smith and Scott Mosier who were called in to do the track after talking ROAD HOUSE on the tenth-anniversary DVD of CLERKS. Both commentaries are fun to listen to. Herrington's commentary is for those who want to know more about the flick and the Smith/Mosier commentary is for those that want a nice laugh at the expense of this cinematic marvel. Also included on the DVD is a look-back documentary and a short featurette on the direct-to-video sequel.

As an actual film: 5/10 As a campy guy film: 10/10

Maybe a guilty pleasure for me but during my childhood and to this day I really enjoy this movie.

A Patrick Swayze in a state of grace with role after role, which one is more iconic (remember that this movie is between Dirty Dancing and Ghost for example).

It has everything an 80's action movie had to have: violence, rock and roll, drama, romance and risque scenes.

It does not shine because of its script but rather the meme lies in the fact that everyone who approached the main character had a bad fate assured.

I really highlight the soundtrack with songs by Bob Seger, which is a personal weakness but with an incredible Jeff Healey and that every lover of a good electric guitar cannot ignore.

It hurts the remake and that damn Hollywood habit of wanting to bring old things to the present with the usual result: it's not the same.

Recommended for all lovers of this type of cinema.

Patrick Swayze kicks ass, takes names, & loves the ladies!

Great action flick for Swayze to strut his stuff.

How has it taken me this long to see this film?

The dialog, story and acting in this are so cliched that I believe it is a parody of action movies. Others believe it is a straight action movie gone horribly wrong. Whatever the intentions, this movie is very entertaining and very, very stupid. I love it, superior in every way to Sophie's Choice.