Casablanca Express

As a 22 year Army veteran, I become almost nauseous viewing war movies with numerous technical errors. The "Marine" assault battalion fires a 3.5" rocket launcher from a moving train without regard to the back blast effect on the Marines riding directly behind the weapon.

The army uniforms were hokey. Army officers, under the rank of general, have two insignias per lapel, a "U.S." and a branch insignia. About half the time one of our heroes has his worn correctly, the other half of the time incorrectly.

The rescuing Marines have corpsmen with them that have ludicrous looking helmet liners with huge red crosses on them. Those crosses would have made great targets for even a blind sniper.

The soldiers accompanying the train were geared up for combat wearing their helmet liners sans helmets. They also were wearing an American flag patch on their left shoulders. These flag patches should have been on their right shoulders (I know D-Day invasion forces had these flags sewn on, but I am not too sure about our soldiers in Africa) and their unit patches on their left.

Certainly wish some of the directors/producers could spring a few bucks and hire some ex-GI's as technical advisers.

CASABLANCA EXPRESS is a last-ditch Italian WW2 film, actually shot in Casablanca in part and set on a train for much of the running time. It comes to us courtesy of Sergio Martino, a man who has created films like THE CASE OF THE SCORPION'S TAIL and MOUNTAIN OF THE CANNIBAL GOD throughout a lengthy career, though it's undoubtedly one of his lesser efforts.

The story is about Winston Churchill embarking on a train journey and the attempts by the Nazis to have him assassinated en route. Thankfully, the powers that be employ some top counter-agents to fight off the threat, and the stage is set for plentiful action. What a pity, then, that the film turns out to be so cheap, shoddy and inept, fumbling what should be suspenseful action sequences and generally proving to be less than enthralling.

CASABLANCA EXPRESS boasts not one but two offspring of famous movie stars; Jason Connery, son of Sean, is the wooden lead, while Francesco Quinn, son of Anthony, supports him. A trio of famous names - Jean Sorel, Donald Pleasence, and Glenn Ford - feature heavily on the cast list and advertising, but are largely limited to those 'sitting around talking' type roles that are included for tokenism. There's a nice little role for STAGE FRIGHT's David Brandon, though. This film also features the worst Chuchill lookalike after ever.

If CASABLANCA EXPRESS had featured halfway decent action and suspense scenes it might have been good, but it all feels quite inept. There isn't a great deal of realism here, a lot of the acting is over the top, and the shoot-outs and explosions do look very staged.

Ultra lame World War II flick. Absolutely flat dialog scenes, boring action sequences, and some of the worst music ever devised by man! I'm usually a big fan of Sergio Martino's work, but this film was far too weak to stand up. The two stars, Francesco Quinn and Jason Connery, are the sons of Anthony Quinn and Sean Connery. Star-power (or son-of-star-power) is what the film relied upon too heavily. The result is a 90 minute waste of time, with some of the most startling historical errors ever committed to film. Far too boring to be funny.

Yeah, like the other reviewers write, this is one lousy movie. Featuring big star children Jason Connery and Francesco Quinn, it's hard to imagine being able to take a promising premise (Churchill taken by the Germans on a train) and turn it into absolute garbage. The only acting worse than Jason Connery's was Francesco Quinn's. Man, they are lousy. Even known actors don't fare well. Glenn Ford and Donald Pleasance seem old, tired and disinterested. French actor Jean Sorel looks bemused throughout, and the whole thing is lifeless and oh-so-boring. I could forgive the mass historical and military inaccuracies if it was entertaining, but it doesn't (IMO) even rise to the 'so bad it's good' level. It's just bad. Oh, I did state that there was about 30 seconds of film that was worthwhile. That would be the scenes early in the film where Jinny Steffan, who's kinda hot, is showing her boobs :)

Other than the fact that Casablanca Express is actually filmed in Morocco and in Casablanca itself, there isn't all that much to recommend it to viewers. I'd stick with the Warner Brothers Casablanca made quite well on their back lot.

This film involves an attempt to kidnap Winston Churchill while on the way to Casablanca for that conference with FDR. It's a combination of The Lady Vanishes and any of the Indiana Jones films in that last half.

Our Nazi friends hear that Churchill is traveling by train to Casablanca and set up a paratrooper raid. No doubt they got the idea from the folks who planned that raid that freed Mussolini after the Fascist government in Italy was overthrown. Possibly Churchill was riding the Marrakesh Express.

Leading the effort to save Winston Churchill are the sons of a pair of movie legends, Jason Connery and Francesco Quinn. Also helping our intrepid heroes out is Jinny Stefan who wields one mean machine gun against the paratroopers.

Standing around and looking like they were waiting for the checks to clear the bank are Glenn Ford and Donald Pleasance playing an American and British officer in charge of Churchill's safety.

Well, we all know Churchill made it to Casablanca intact. But why isn't this in the history books? Well if you're curious you'll see the film.

There's not much other reason for doing so.