Firebird 2015 AD

Well... This was an awesome movie when I first saw it. Unfortunately that was when I was six years old. So, if you're a six year old looking for a taught sci-fi thriller then this is your movie. If you are an adult looking for a weird reverse-jingoistic slow paced film with a budget that hovers somewhere in the low hundreds then this is your film. This movie is easily categorized as being hard to find for a reason. And despite all this, I want to see it again. On the upside it has a relatively decent quality cast, most of which appear to be mortified by having to take part. And as another poster mentioned, the batcave-style barn is pretty neat regardless.

Full disclosure: I watched this movie because I saw it on "The 50 Worst Movies Ever Made" DVD, so I was looking for a bad movie. I was hoping for some campy, 70s/80s post-apocalyptic fun, like Warriors of the Wasteland, or numerous other low budget movies from around the same time. This thing, however, was not bad in a fun way, but bad in a horrible and boring way.

So, if you're looking for "so bad it's good", this is not the movie you seek.

You get the basic idea: it's the distant future (of 2015), and gas burning cars have been outlawed. This was supposedly done because there was a fuel shortage, but of course it was really just a way for the Evil Government to control the people.

These laws are enforced by the "Department of Vehicular Control" or DVC, and they're resisted by a colorful cast of characters who live in the desert and conserve gas by driving the the lowest mileage cars possible. They're not trying to start a revolution or anything, just driving around in the desert having fun. They're called "burners", which is actually the most interesting thing in the movie. I really think they might have come up with that name and then tried (unsuccessfully) to write a movie around it.

The DVC are roughly as good at their jobs as the stormtroopers in Star Wars. The burners drive around in broad daylight through the open desert, surrounded by hills, kicking up clouds of dust that could be seen for miles, and talking on CB radios, but the DVC still seems to only find them by complete accident. Also, like the stormtroopers, they can't hit the broad side of a barn with their guns.

Doug McClure is the head of the local DVC patrol. He's conflicted about his job and trying in vain to control his subordinates, who have a tendency to get get all murderous and rapey when left to their own devices.

The burners aren't really organized, but they all defer to Red, played by Darren McGavin, who owns the eponymous vehicle. He lives in a secret location, which appears to be the only building for miles around, but of course the DVC is unable to find it. The action of the movie is precipitated by the arrival of his estranged son, Cam - played by an actor desperately trying to hide his English accent.

That's basically the plot. It's not a spoiler to tell you there are plenty of pointless (and not very exciting) car chases and explosions, and not to expect too much of a payoff at the ending. In fact, it doesn't so much "end" as get to 90 minutes and stop.

Perhaps the only amusing thing are their attempts to titillate the audience without losing their PG rating. There's the randy girl-burner, Jill, who has to work ridiculously hard to seduce the clueless Cam. This culminates in a millisecond long topless shot (don't blink or you'll miss it). There's also a weird scene where a female DVC agent takes a very sensual shower - fully clothed!

Probably the worst thing about the movie is the soundtrack - a bunch of terrible songs written just for this. I had to turn the sound down every time one started playing.

Speaking of music, here's a little bit of trivia: this movie came out the same year Rush released Red Barchetta, which has basically the same theme. Red Barchetta is much better, and of course rock songs don't have to make sense.

Mind you, it does sport some fine Alberta Badlands scenery. Still, I wonder why the creators of this film overlooked a shining opportunity for an approximation of wit. In the fascist America of 14 years hence, private use of petroleum is not allowed. Who enforces this? Why, the DVC, the Department of Vehicle Control, represented by the surly chief, a plainly psychotic lackey, the woman who's secretly sympathetic to the rebels and a couple of other nondescript guys. Did nobody think that instead of the DVC, it should be have been... the DMV?

Ponder that, if you're ever bored enough to watch this.

I came across this movie by accident on a Pontiac Firebird group on Facebook and I thought I'd check this flick out. Now the concept of the movie revolves around the government banning oil due to a supposed shortage, which in the film has a U. S senator proposing a bill to bring it back. In the mean time, a group of car drivers called burners use muscle cars as the ultimate form of rebellion. To stop these burners, a police group called the DVC ride gas burning motorcycles to hunt down these cars.

First I'll talk the negatives about the movie.

The main problem with the movie is simply how the story is told. Its pretty boring throughout as much of the film contains many cars driving, but without any suspense or performing stunts, along with long conversations between the characters, which focus on either the burners or the DVC officers.

Now on to the positives.

The cast for the most part were great and did the very best job they had with the story given and the budget, which was obviously low considering the whole movie was shot in the Badlands of Drumheller, Alberta, which does make a very cool setting in a wasteland desert, sort of like the Mad Max films, but with more green and mountains. The main draw for me were the cars featured in the film. The main star car was of course the black and blue 1980 Pontiac Firebird Turbo Trans Am that McGavin drives, along with a black 1970 Plymouth Cuda and a white 71 Mustang coupe that gets blown up by the DVC. Another positive of the movie was the soundtrack, especially the theme song "Firebird" by Billy Ledster. I really with that song was released as a single, but unfortunately this is the only place where it can be found.

Overall I didn't mind the vibe of the movie as I can understand and appreciate a low budget movie and I had an good time with it. Thankfully it is currently free to the watch on YouTube, but I really wish this movie was given an official release to DVD fully restored in HD. Hopefully one day that will happen, but I'll give this movie 1 thumb up for not being a huge disappointment.

First, I got this movie free from a friend who was going to throw it away... I should have let him! If somebody offers you a free movie.... don't take it! This movie is so bad on so many levels. I really like Darrin McGavin, but even he couldn't save this garbage. It's not even funny, it is a crime! There seems to be a goof in every scene. My favorite goof is when the guy is being chased by the cops on mopeds (Ilove cops on mopeds) and in one scene he isn't wearing a helmet and the next he is! Or when 4 cops shoot high powered rifles from point blank range and miss about 100 times! And then get mad at the other cop who kills the perp with a missile. What were they trying to do... wound him? They couldn't even shoot out his tires! And since the "burners" drove on the roads... maybe the cops should have staked out the ROADS! And why are there roads if there are no cars? I love "bad" futuristic movies like "A Boy and his Dog" and "Death Race 2000" and now they seem like "Gone with the Wind" compared to this crap.

I'm sure the biggest item on their budget was the $900 for the used Mustang II to blow up. I also love the cops of the future living in canvas tents in the desert and having no two way radio contact with the rest of the world.

Did I mention just how bad this movie is???? No I can't use those words here...hehehehe! Free movies are never free... there is always a price to pay. My price... there's 90 minutes of my life I'll never get back! One last thing... why does Darrin McGavin's son in the movie have an English accent???? WHY???????????