The Return

I had actually never heard about this sci-fi thriller titled "The Return" from 1980. I stumbled upon the movie by random chance here in 2023, and while I am not overly keen on sci-fi movies in general, then I still opted to watch "The Return", as I sat it had Cybill Shepherd and Jan-Michael Vincent on the cast list.

Writers Ken Wheat, Jim Wheat and Curtis Burch didn't exactly manage to put together an overwhelmingly interesting or entertaining script for the movie. I was rather bored throughout the 91 minutes that the movie trotted on for; especially since everything felt random and didn't have much of any red thread to.

The acting performances in the movie were fair enough. Nothing grand, though.

The special effects in "The Return" were nothing spectacular. There were some effects, and some actually played out well enough, while others were dubious at best.

I am sure that die-hard sci-fi fans could get a kick out of watching "The Return". But me, as a casual viewer, didn't find much enjoyment in director Greydon Clark's 1980 movie.

My rating of "The Return" lands on a three out of ten stars.

Jennifer has come to a small New Mexico town to set up geological monitoring equipment for her father's organization. Some of the townspeople find her behavior suspicious. And she gets attacked several times by a vicious but mysterious dog. Several ranchers have lost cattle that were not only killed but mutilated, and cults or perhaps aliens are blamed because there are no flies or anything.

Dr. Kramer, Jennifer's father, comes to the town wanting to know more about what is going on. The ranchers, including the independent and stubborn Walt, resent people who know nothing about cattle butting into the situation. Meanwhile, Deputy Wayne seems to like Jennifer.

Later, people are found mutilated as well as cattle. The first time it happens, a weird looking man shows up carrying what looks like the light sabers from the 'Star Wars' movies, only it is held in the middle.

Shepherd did a good job as an actress here, but mostly she just looked beautiful. I'm used to seeing her look like, say, Martha Stewart these days. Raymond Burr seemed like Perry Mason at times, but in other scenes he and all the other actors seemed like they were reading their lines. I'm thinking particularly of a scene back at his headquarters where the scientists were explaining their theories.

I didn't find this movie particularly scary, except when the dog was on screen, and in scenes close to the end. That's okay because I don't like scary. The violence was not all that bad, though we did see blood. The special effects were not that great, though we got to see what looked like a portal into another dimension several times. It looked like the kind of modern art people often hate if they want realism. It was pretty to look at, anyway--sort of like a purple 'black hole'.

The ending was weird but satisfying in a way, though I couldn't help but feel someone cheated because they couldn't find their way out of the mess they had gotten into.

I've seen better mysteries.

THE RETURN stars Cybill Shepherd and Jan Michael-Vincent as adults who meet again, years after a childhood incident involving extraterrestrial activity. Jennifer (Shepherd) is now a scientist, and Wayne (Jan-Michael Vincent) is a lawman who enjoys shooting car stereos. Events lead the duo to remember what happened to them that fateful night.

Jennifer's dad (Raymond Burr) arrives in town, pontificating furiously due to a local cattle mutilation epidemic. Enter rancher / hot head, Walt (Neville Brand), who yells a lot in a gruff voice. This man definitely knows his cows!

Simultaneously, the sheriff (Martin Landau) is on the case, while trying to figure out how to dunk doughnuts in a can of beer. Could alien mischief be behind all this? Can Waynifer figure things out, before the sheriff dunks his first doughnut? And, what about the peculiar prospector, his mini- light saber, and his devil dog? And, why does he have a black hole in his cave? Annnd, just why did Wayne drive his motorcycle through that window, in slow-motion? Was Mr. Vincent symbolically recreating his final scene from WHITE LINE FEVER?

Regardless, this is one hilariously funny movie, and you will believe! In aliens? No, in the power of love, doughnuts, light sabers, Raymond Burr, and the ability to float elegantly in black holes!...

"The Return" has to rank as one of the lesser efforts of veteran cult director Greydon Clark. It's not that it's all THAT incompetent, but a weak script, co-written by brothers Ken and Jim Wheat ("The Silent Scream", "Pitch Black") prevents it from working all that well. The audience is going to end up scratching their heads while they try to make some sense out of the strange goings-on. As for the rest, it's all just silly and cheesy enough to rate as acceptable B movie entertainment. This reviewer knows that he throws out the word "amusing" an awful lot, but there's really no other way to describe this thing. And it's that amusement factor that manages to keep this watchable.

The actors are remarkably sincere. Jan-Michael Vincent and Cybill Shepherd star as Wayne and Jennifer, a deputy in a small New Mexico town and hottie scientist respectively, who as children had had a close encounter. Also witness to the aliens' arrival was a prospector (the late, great character actor Vincent Schiavelli, one of those people who you always recognize but whose name you may never remember). The kids grow up, of course, but Schiavelli remains the same age. Shepherds' character gets wind of strange fog activity in this small town and soon after she gets there cattle begin to be mutilated. Then, people get mutilated as well.

Things take a pretty goofy turn when a character is seen to carry around a lightsaber type weapon, except it's held in the middle. Add to this a light show that is actually fairly impressive as well as some decent makeup effects and solid rural atmosphere, and the viewer gets what amounts to a mild hoot of a movie. Also in the cast are Martin Landau, who's wasted as Vincents' comedy-relief sheriff, Raymond Burr as Shepherds' father, who looks like he's reading his lines at times (and indeed he was), Neville Brand as a hostile rancher, Brad Rearden (who'd acted in "The Silent Scream") as Brands' bratty son, and Clark regular Darby Hinton ("Malibu Express") as one of Reardens' trouble making pals. Undeniable assets are cinematography by Daniel Pearl ("The Texas Chain Saw Massacre") and nice music by Dan Wyman.

Clark also did the well regarded "Without Warning" that was released the same year as this, and that one is recommended more than "The Return", which even B movie enthusiasts might find underwhelming.

Clark appears on screen as a city slicker victim.

Six out of 10.

" The Return" views like a puzzle that is impossible to solve. It features some intriguing actors including, Neville Brand, Martin Landau, and Vincent Schiavelli, in supporting roles. A small New Mexico town is visited by aliens, putting on a light show. Two children and Schiavelli, are "contacted" for an unknown purpose. Fast forward twenty five years when Cybil Shepherd and Jan Michael Vincent, are enlightened that they were the two chosen children. Chosen for what is of course unknown. Meanwhile Neville Brand, playing a local rancher, is dealing with cattle mutilations, that he blames on scientist Shepherd. Raymond Burr, Shepherd's Father, deduces that the aliens left some sign carved on a rock for an unknown purpose. "The Return" is a movie asking all questions while revealing zero answers, and is a very frustrating viewing experience. - MERK