Kaine le mercenaire

This movie has all the classic elements of a standard fantasy movie - a few good ideas and loads of bad execution. Notable for the appearance of David Carradine who plays just about the most unsympathetic character I've seen him play. Check out the exotic dancer scene, good for a few laughs. The extras were obviously new to acting, since they could hardly have done a worse job. Nevertheless, the script has a decent plot to it.

Its the 80's and Sword and Sorcery without CGI is the game. David Carradine wanders into town with a massive sword and runs through the script of Yojimbo, then he runs through a series of henchman in some poorly executed fight scenes.

There is a town and a well that provides all the water. Two hopeless chieftains battle for control until Carradine plays both sides.

Budget must have been very tight, most of the savings made in the Women's clothing budgets - nudity a standard.

The film is just lacking in almost all areas, but at least it gets on with it in a breezy 80 minutes and therefore carries enough dumb fun to completely outweigh its welcome.

This movie was not great by any means. The plot was acceptable, and sometimes comical. The characters were fairly one-dimensional and relatively easy to predict. The movie was more for laughs than anything else, as there are quite a number of random things. If you ever watch the movie, be on the lookout for: a talking lizard, pointless nudity, and David Carradine pulling down his eye socket (which was completely bizarre). This movie was not the best 'worst' movie ever, but it was fairly decent for mindless entertainment. The swordplay was tolerable too, but the sets were awful. I enjoyed it though, as David Carradine is just so cool in his own right.

Well, first off you can't expect much from the man who produced the Deathstalker Series.. =) But this film I think is the better of the whole sword and sorcery films he's released.

The story is set in a slave town where two clans are at swords with each other to control the well and the people in this desert wasteland. The film circles the adventures of the Dark One(according to the box and creds, Carridine's character's name is Kain, which I don't want to call him. Its just stupid to name him the same thing from Kung Fu. He's only called the Dark One in the movie), who has stumbled into this town, and begins selling his skills as a swordsman to the higher pay.

The film is pretty decent, but don't expect Conan the Barbarian, or Beastmaster. The only two questions I have are:

Why doesn't Naja(Maria Socas) EVER put on a bra or a shirt? The whole entire film she is topless. At first I thought it was because she was a slave wench to one of the clans, but even when she was free, she still didn't put anything on.

If the Sword of Ura can cut through an anvil, why doesn't it chop through everyone's swords like a hot knife through butter?

Eh, oh well. Watch the film if you have nothing better to do.

So, it's not the latest Merchant-Ivory production. Let's face it, those blokes could certainly learn a thing or two from the Roger Corman school of filmmaking.

"THE WARRIOR AND THE SORCERESS" has a lot going for it, and bears the distinction of being the only film in motion picture history to ever combine all of the following elements* into a neat 77 minute package AND still manage to pack the kids' lunches, run for Governor of Illinois and pick up last week's dry cleaning all at the same time. What a trooper!

*"The following elements"... -- David Carradine -- Tons of naked women -- Sword fights (inept and otherwise) -- Maria Socas running around topless eighty percent of the time -- Cues from James Horner's "HUMANOIDS FROM THE DEEP" score -- Tons of breasts... the friendly kind -- A fat man and his angry lizard (that astounds like no other animatronic, yet immobile angry lizard ever could!) -- A chick with four... count 'em... four tits (beat that Verhoeven!) -- And, of course... David Carradine.

What more could you ask for? A blender? This film deserves it's own category. Peplum Film Noir.

If you want to send love this Christmas, give 'em "THE WARRIOR AND THE SORCERESS". They'll devour it in 77 minutes flat... and, love you for it, if time permits.