Kids Incorporated

KIDS Incorporated is what would have happened had the 90210 gang been a kids band in the 80's.

The KIDS were actually a neverending Menudo-style lineup of tweenie-boppers, who performed as the house-band at a Peach Pit style malt-shop/hangout for rugrats. They sashayed across stage in their large, over-sized, neon colored blouses and tight black leggings. They rocked out on their guitars and keyboards, with enough dramatic energy to suggest that they thought the instruments *really* were plugged in, and they *really* were playing them. The KIDS covered our not-so-favorite hits from Casey's Top 40, and we tuned in every week to see which songs they were going to put to a slow torturous death.

KIDS gave us Marta Marerro, before she washed the 20 lbs. of 'L.A. Looks' out of her hair and became pop-goth princess Martika. I prefer the old Martika, in all her satin jacket, giant brooch-wearing, neon leg-warmer glory. She was sassy and saucey and we worshipped her and her Crayola make-up, and we kept hoping her pirouettes would go awry and she'd fly off stage.

And you had to love "The Kid" (no, he was not played by Prince). "The Kid" marched around with attitude and threw shade and impersonated Diana Ross. Luvvem! There was also this dude named Riley, who made way-awesome yogurt-frappe' and seemingly loved steroids. I think he owned or managed the club or something. He helped the KIDS through life-altering crises like:

*Which song should the band do tonite-- "We Got The Beat", "Rhythm Of The Night" or "Gloria?"

*Stacey is like, sooooo tired of being a back-up singer. If she doesn't get to sing lead, like, NOW...she is going to barf out her retainer and go solo!

*Ohmahgawd...there's a leprechaun next to the gelatto machine and he's all like, "Where's me lucky pot-o-gold?" (I loved that episode...the leprechaun was "Isaac", the evil dwarf guy from "Children Of The Corn"!!!)

Damn I miss this show. We hated the KIDS and we loved them too. We sang along with them and then secretly wished the roof would collapse on top of them. The Saturday morning TV universe is a stark, empty void without KIDS intoxicated.

Growing up the same age as the kids on the show, I thought it was the best. My sister and I sang along, we loved the outfits, the hair, and ESPECIALLY the music.

Yes, It's possible if I were to view this again, I would be as embarrassed to watch it as I am to listen to my old beloved New Kids on the Block albums. But, with my naive love intact, I say, bring on the DVD box set. I'll buy 'em all!

Kids' Incorporated back then is similar to what movies like "High School Musical" are to kids today. It's not meant to be groundbreaking television, and no, the kids (clearly) don't play their own instruments.

But with three of these child stars still on the celebrity scene today (Fergie, Mario Lopez and Jennifer Love Hewitt,) you would have to agree that those kids were talented. It's not their fault they came of age in the 80's!

Plus, the 80's are back.

What many negative people fail to point out is that Kids Inc. was nominated for many Emmys, and its stars won Youth In Film awards several times. It ran for 9 seasons because it was clearly a fan favorite.

Kids Inc. gave countless numbers of kids the chance to live out their fantasies and contained none of the sex or violence that runs rampant on TV. Instead of whiny, 5-octave-too-high tunes like Kidz Bop, it featured REAL kids, who actually sang. In its later seasons, it dealt with topics that actual kids were dealing with, and didn't downplay them. They used music that was current AT THE TIME, and judging the show out of context is not right. Unlike other live-action kids shows, the small, recurring casts gave us a chance to identify with the characters and watch them grow.

If this is going to turn into another Jump the Shark site, I'd like the link to my site "The Little Site That Could" removed, please.

While it lasted the show was a lot of fun. The show portrayed kids in a rock band, performing a teen-dance club. Also the kids dealt with promblems such as a being too shy to ask someone on a date, or having a friend that likes Shakespeare while you only want to listen to rock and roll. A neat concept, at the time. Only disagreement with the show was the songs. By the time the show received permission to have the kids sing the songs, they were not as popular.

Random fact: in the last season you can see me in the audience in two episodes.

Anyhow, that aside, as a preteen, I adored this show and it's cast of regularly vanishing performers. Some have gone on to great things, Stacy is in Black Eyed Peas, Martika did quite well on her own, Haylie Johnson pops up on TV occasionally, Reneé Sands(trom) is in the group "Wild Orchid," and then there's TV darling Jennifer Love Hewitt.

Looking back at this show, I suppose it was all a bit silly, but it was harmless enough, and is ripe for a revival. How about it, Lynch Entertainment?