Notti porno nel mondo

The undisputed king of trash, Bruno Mattei depicts various sexual perversions that take place around the world! Features a woman making love to a gorilla, strip shows, lesbo clubs, bestiality, sex through a glass, nude roller-skating, she-males, nude wrestling, sex schools, virgin sacrifices, decapitations, castrations... you get the picture! Laura Gemser narrates and gets nude of course. Shocking, outrageous, hyper-sleazy mondo in it's UNCUT Italian print! Do not worry about the lack of English options- this one is actually a montage of sleazy images without even slight storyline or plot! Not to be confused with EMANUELLE AND THE PORNO NIGHTS- the other Mattei mondo-mess starring (actually hosted by) Laura Gemser.

With a wink and a smile, Laura Gemser, sultry star of many an Italian exploitation flick, introduces viewers to a world of sex, strippers, sleaze and violence, as captured by prolific Italian director Bruno Mattei.

The film (hosted by Gemser in varying states of undress) reveals bizarre happenings around the world, which is presented to the audience as real-life 'mondo' footage, but which, in reality, is a series of specially orchestrated sequences designed specifically for this movie.

My version of this 70s piece of cinematic trash was uncut and unsubtitled, which meant that Gemser's prattle-track (in Italian) meant virtually nothing to me. But even without a complete understanding of proceedings, I can confidently state that this film is mind-numbingly dull, despite wall-to-wall nudity, much softcore sex, and a few brief moments of extreme bloody nastiness.

Although I can't be sure that the following descriptions are 100% accurate, here is a brief rundown of the 'best bits' in this dreadful film: a stripper performs with a man in a manky gorilla costume; another stripper performs with a couple of rather uninterested canines; a prostitute shows potential customers her wares, before inviting one 'lucky' chap into her glass-fronted booth for a freebie session; a bizarre magic show, in which an English speaking magician transforms his sexy assistant into a hermaphrodite; a shocking scene set in deepest, darkest Africa, in which an adulterous couple are punished for their sins (by genital mutilation and decapitation!); a sexy game, in which women poke their bare butts though a hole in a screen and have sex with men who might possibly be their husband; some voodoo/ Macumba shenanigans, in which chickens have their heads removed; and a woman inserting ping-pong balls up her 'holiest-of-holies'.

Whilst this all sounds like unmissable fare for fans of weird cinema, believe me when I say that staying awake during this film is a real challenge. How Bruno Mattei makes gratuitous nudity and sleaze so difficult to endure is beyond my understanding, but he does so with aplomb.

Sexy Night Report (1977)

** (out of 4)

Silly but entertaining Mondo movie has Laura Gemser introducing us to various strip clubs across the world where various strange acts take place. We get to see acts such as a magic trick that turns a woman into a man, a stripper a little too attached to her dog, nude roller skating, a strip act for lesbians only, an African tribe dance plus an even stranger one with an ape falling for the stripper. From what I've read, D'Amato directed the narration and introductions with Gemser while the one and only Mattei stepped in to film everything else. This is probably true as the strip scenes, which are suppose to be taking place all over the world, are often obviously being filmed on the same set. I viewed the complete, uncut Italian print, which didn't feature any subtitles but it wasn't too hard following everything that was going on and I'm fairly certain whatever dialogue that was written would have been silly anyways. The movie is pretty much what you'd expect from something like this with the sleaze level rather low but the nudity is very high. The stories are all mildly entertaining but if you want to see women naked then I guess the stories aren't too important. I found the nude skating to be rather funny and the dog sequence was pretty disturbing even though nothing ever crosses the line (good thing D'Amato didn't direct this!). Other highlights include a stripper teaching a class on sex dolls and some silly stuff dealing with the magician and his incredibly bad magic trick. Fans of Mondo movies will be the only ones even tempted to check this thing out as I'm sure most will be put off by the camp factor and the all around cheese. Gemser fans will be happy to know she takes her clothes off for several of her scenes.