Confessions d'un moniteur de club de vacances

Confessions From a Holiday Camp, the fourth and final film to star Robin Askwith as working class lothario Timmy Lea, fails spectacularly as a comedy, the unsophisticated script resorting to embarrassing racist remarks, crass homophobic jokes, and childish slapstick in a desperate attempt to illicit giggles from its audience.

'So, if it's not all that funny, then why have you rated it so highly?' I hear you ask. The answer: the endless quality British crumpet, of course. The plot, which sees Timmy organising a beauty contest at Camp Funfrall, allows for plenty of bare breasts, some shapely female derrieres, and more bush than Hampton Court Maze. Not only does the lovely Linda Hayden, star of the first Confessions film, return to play foxy French holiday host Brigitte, but we also get sexy brunette Caroline Ellis as yummy Brummie Gladys, Kim Hardy as the camp's tasty announcer, Nicola Blackman as Blackbird, the camp's curvacous Caribbean queen (and, sadly, the brunt of the racist jokes), and busty Janet Edis as a horny MILF.

Unfortunately, there's also rather a lot of Robin Askwith's hairy ass on display, but you can't win 'em all I suppose.

"Timmy Lea" (Robin Askwith) and his philandering brother-in-law (Anthony Booth) from "Confessions of a Window Cleaner" (and two other "Confessions" movies I haven't seen) are working together once again, this time running a holiday camp called "Camp Funfrall". Their jobs are on the line, however, when the camp gets a new uptight owner. The brother-in-law tries to redeem them by sponsoring a beauty contest for the unusually large amount of nubile lovelies that patronize the camp, but his efforts are jeopardized by Timmy's customary habit of falling into various madcap sexual situations, which always seems to result in him running naked around the camp (to the point where he is dubbed "the Camp Streaker"). And to make matters even worse, Timmy's goofy parents and sister also show up to add to the zaniness.

Compared to "Confessions of a Window Cleaner" this British sex comedy has a little less emphasis on sex and a little more on comedy. Unfortunately, the comedy isn't nearly as funny as in the earlier entry, mostly because Timmy's hilarious parents don't have nearly as large of role. The lovely Linda Hayden (who played his fiancée in the first movie) returns as a different character, a French co-worker. Hayden's French accent is none-too-convincing, but she's never clad more than scantily, and often not at all. The same is true of the other women at the camp, including a black girl (to whom Timmy makes some very politically incorrect comments that nevertheless don't dissuade her from going to bed with him), an older married woman (Penny Meredith), and two giggly teenage friends (Carol Ellis and Sue Upton) . As usual, however, Askwith himself spends more time in the buff than any of the women. (I sometimes suspect that this series, with pretty-boy, Mick Jagger-lookalike Askwith, was aimed more at a 70's British version of a "bi-curious" audience as opposed to an entirely straight one).

If you liked the first movie (like I kind of did), this is not as good, but it's not necessarily bad. If you didn't like the first one though, you'll probably find this one even worse.

I am a fan of the whole series of movies, but this movie had a different feel to it. I would say it was more like the on the buses holiday movie but obviously more naughty. If you are a fan of the carry on series of movies or have seen the adventures of, series of movies then I would recommend seeing this movie and the others too.

This is the most saucy out of the four "Confessions". You get from this one, just what you get from the others, only it's funnier and more raunchy. Again walking hazzard, Askwith and his brother in law have a new venture, working at a holiday camp, a real dive but it does have it's perks. Whoever thought there'd be an underground cafe, where through the windows you can see the underground of the family pool, and that's not all, as there's a familiar streaker roaming about, and as a Confession's fan, you don't have to be an Einstein to figure out who. And again the family pay a visit, including the bigoted Grandad, who I find a hoot. He gets pie eyed and mistakes one of those long funeral cars, carrying a coffin, as their ride to the camp, the bereaved family, with them. The grandad tries to cheer the family with sing song. There's a great raunchy scene near the end with Askwith up to his neck again in, you know, cleavage, etc, inside the ghost train building, where the family decide to take a ride. How this ends with Askwith, is just another reason I love these films. He makes up with some hotties, one a busty Brazilian who really wants to win this beauty contest, and you don't want to be at the receiving end, if she loses, as you're liable to be wearing custard pie on your face. The pie fight that erupts, so reminded me of Pacific Banana, where also in that, there was a gay guy. What's funny here, this famous pianist in the movie just keeps on playing through this fight, while below this mischievous kid, is sawing at the legs of the piano. Askwith shares some nude pool too, him and Booth again having close calls with their boss and other staff, their careers in the balance. One of them, a lanky gay guy who's onto them, has his worst fear, coming true, when a score of hotties jump him, where they may of just turned him straight. That is the tastiest and more entertaining of the four, with so many other scenes I'd love to mention. This was the last of the series which in my opinion, ended on the perfect note.

I admit a certain affection for the CONFESSIONS... series of '70s sex comedy, which perfectly captured working class attitudes during that decade, much as the later CARRY ONs did. CONFESSIONS OF A WINDOW CLEANER and CONFESSIONS OF A DRIVING INSTRUCTOR are my favourites, with Askwith's professions lending themselves perfectly to a series of episodic shenanigans.

The last of the quartet is CONFESSIONS FROM A HOLIDAY CAMP, and it really is a last-ditch attempt to wring more money out of audiences. This time around, Askwith and Booth end up working at a dodgy sub-Butlins type place, where girls parade around in the bikinis a lot and end up getting into saucy encounters with a permanently befuddled Askwith.

There are some funny moments here - like the bit with Askwith in the swimming pool - but a lot of it is cringeworthy rather than amusing and the slapstick scenes are very childish. Lance Percival's portrayal of a gay guy is really awful, as are Askwith's off-colour jokes at the expense of a black woman. It's a pity the script is so poor, because there's some top totty here in the form of Liz Fraser and Penny Meredith, but they would have been better served in one of the other, better, instalments.