Défense de toucher

Slogged through finding and reviewing this for one scene. Italian sex comedy says it all. Saw it on Cinemax, or equivalent, in the 80's and remember Jack Palance stroking the pubic hair of a naked young gal stretched across his lap. And Bond villains stroke cats!?! Bond gals at the height of their powers, what's not to like. The gal on Jack's lap deserves mention somewhere, and whoever conceived that setting.

"The Sensuous Nurse" is a 1975 Italian sex comedy that should manage to satisfy most viewers. It has been handsomely produced, features an array of oddball and amusing characters, and is never less than lively. The story here deals with a scheming family that hires a nurse named Anna (Ursula Andress) to care for its desperately ill uncle, in the hopes that her abundant charms will precipitate a cardiac event in the old man and push him over the edge. But, you'll probably be asking, does this film satisfy the minimum requirements of a sex comedy? Is it both sexy AND funny? Thankfully, the answer is a definite "yes." This film has a rep for featuring Ms. Undress' sexiest performance ever, and, as it turns out, deservedly so. Ursula appears in any number of full-frontal nude scenes (her arched-back skinny-dip is especially memorable), and as an extraspecial treat for 007 fans who like to see their Bond girls nekkid in other films, we are here treated to the awesome spectacle of Luciana Paluzzi (Fiona in 1965's "Thunderball") showing off her, uh, paluzzis in very frenetic fashion. The presence of these two bared Bond babes should automatically make this film a must for all red-blooded American horndogs; come to think of it, they might want to pair this film with the 1971 giallo "The Black Belly of the Tarantula," with its remarkable Claudine Auger/Barbara Bach/Barbara Bouchet Bond-babe triumvirate! Comedywise, Duilio del Prete stands out as the family's chief conspirator; his is a very amusing bit of farcical acting. Just watch him wiggle around while trying to show Ursula how to act sexy! And even Jack Palance gets to play a menacingly droll small role here! Bottom line: If you want a sexy and entertaining film to watch one evening, you can certainly do worse than "The Sensuous Nurse." Oh...another great-looking DVD from No Shame, too.

I reckon the nurse fantasy is quite common. The sexy and good looking woman that will help you get better. Well there is a sort of a twist here, because the nurse is not hired so the patient gets better. There are ulterior motives at play here. All in the name of comedy.

A lot of nudity (not just from Ursual Andress) and I guess scenes that can be considered comedy. The movie fails to make everyone smile throughout though. And if you consider todays sensibilities and maybe some even sterner from the viewer (if that would describe you best) ... this may lose before it even starts. Especially one scene comes to mind, where a woman gets cornered and ... convinced to do something she seems not to want to do at first ... not an easy watch for sure or at least not that scene.

Other than that, there are some interesting scenes (Ursula in the pool, Ursula undressing and so forth). There could have been more with a tighter script, but I reckon it all was meant to be ... together.

Ursula Andress' naked body is one of those things that make you believe in God. The other two women (especially the one who plays the maid) have great bodies as well. Then why is the higher grade that I can give to a film with such quality and quantity of nudity only 3 out of 10? Because, to get to Ursula's unbelievable body, we have to sit through a movie that is otherwise unfunny and boring (keep in mind that I watched the full 101-minute version, not the 78-minute American one which probably cuts out a lot of the extraneous material). In typical Italian-comedy tradition, most of the characters are exaggerated caricatures (the army freak, the "latin lover", the constant drunk, the naive maid) that are not funny, simply overacted. Final word: watch this, but keep your finger on the fast-forward button, you're gonna need it. (*)

The Sensuous Nurse (1975) was a Italian sexual comedy that starred the one time Bond girl Ursula Andress. Man was she hot in this movie.. She was stacked and built like a *@#% brick house. Ursula was smoking hot in this movie. I have never seen a nurse's outfit that filled out before.

Ms. Andress stars as a nurse who is hired to take care of a rich elderly man. Even one in the house seems to be knocking the boots. One night, the nurse decides to take the grandson's temperature and give some needed T.L.C. to her ancient client. The old man takes to his nurse and this angers the rest of the family. What kind of job did the family hire her out to do? Will the geezer fall for her car giver? How can she deal with the octogenarian crone and the rest of the family? To find out you need to find a copy of the SENSUOUS NURSE!! Italian but badly dubbed into English.

Highly recommended.