The Twilight People

Plan 9 From Outer Space is generally considered to be the worst film of all time. I contend that the people voting have not seen Twilight People. It's basically The Island of Dr Moreau without a budget. In this version of the story, I believe the Doctor is doing his genetic engineering for the Third Reich, as he and his assistant/security guy are Nazis. The half man/half animal creatures are bizarre. There is a bat man, an antelope man, and even a mole woman. I had nightmares about this flick for years (not because it was scary) until I found it on video and re-lived the horror of one of the most awful films of all time. The acting is bad. The writing is bad. The costumes are bad. This is a bad movie.

From the supra-genius mind of Director Eddie Romero comes THE TWILIGHT PEOPLE! Once again, mad science is being perpetrated in the Philippines. This time, diving enthusiast / adventurer, Matt Farrell (John Ashley) is captured by the ne'er-do-well cronies of Dr. Gordon (Charles Macaulay) and taken to a secret fortress. There, Gordon carries out the requisite experiments, causing hideous human / animal hybrids.

Romero fuses THE ISLAND OF DR. MOREAU with JAMES BOND (THE ISLAND OF DR. NO?), making the worst of both. The sci-fi elements are preposterous -the "antelope man"- and the Bond-ish stuff is equally absurd, featuring Ashley in the mega-spy role, looking more like a bloated Elvis Presley in search of a snack! He is aided by none other than Pat Woodell as Dr. Gordon''s daughter. As usual, the action is... less than exciting.

Lovers of cinematic abominations will drool over this sewer sausage! Watch for the incredible Pam Grier as Ayesa, the "panther woman"! In spite of the dime store makeup, she still manages to look hot!

One can only imagine what must have gone through Ms. Grier's mind while she traipsed around with the likes of the "bat man", who resembles someone who fell into a bonfire while wrapped in a shower curtain! Said flying rodent nearly steals the show during his attempted flight sequence! However, the true highlight is Ayesa's deadly rampage!

This movie must be seen by all sentient beings...

Pretty damn boring, if this movie is any indication! The only reasons to see this movie are the goofy bat-man (in a memorable flying sequence) and the goddess herself, Pam Grier, as a laughable panther-woman. Otherwise, avoid at all costs!

I thought this film was fun. It's astounding to see Pam Grier as Panther Woman when you're used to seeing her all glammed up and gorgeous. The noises her character makes I'm sure aren't her, but they are still great noises. I wonder if they actually recorded a real panther snarling.

People say that the makeup is really bad, but I thought it was really good. At least on the faces it was good. The rest of the body was pretty bad. For example, a wolf girl who is totally hairy all over her head and face, but has no hair anywhere else. The same goes for the ape man. I guess the costume designers were trying to show that they were actually half human/half beast. But it still looked a little hokey. Especially seeing Bat Man's wings were only attached to him at his shoulders and not anywhere on his sides or armpits. How does that work? I never took physics, but that just doesn't make sense.

The plot is pretty good, not too dull. I liked the first scene when the man is skin diving and gets reeled up by the ankles. It looks like it would have hurt a lot! It's not like he was wearing socks or anything.

I thought the militant, creepy, macho guy was a good character, especially since they hinted at him being attracted to men. The man appears to be incredibly masculine and macho, but he can't hide his attraction to men, though he denies it. I thought his character was a good stray from the stereotypical gay man. Why not have a gay character be ultra masculine for a change? Crush the stereotypes, I say. And did you see how straight and white his teeth were? Wow, that actor should have been in a Colgate commercial!

The daughter character sure gets thrown around a lot. It seems everyone wants to push her around. She's so skinny and frail, I was surprised she didn't get hurt more often. She had a cool face, though. Mysterious, pale with dark features. Not the best actress or character, but she had really nice hair, if that makes a difference...

Really the best parts of the movie begin well over half-way through it. You get to see the animal-people come out and strut their stuff. How the daughter isn't freaked out by these monsters, I don't know. I'd have been running through that jungle the second Pam Grier gave her first howl. Those beasts were pretty freaky looking! Plus, how often do antelope actually LIKE wolves? In reality, wolves eat antelope, don't they? All it takes is a little human blood to get those primal enemy feelings to go away, right?

If you want to see this movie, just fast forward through the first 45-55 minutes. It's not worth it. You'll be better off watching the last half hour and nothing else. Ape Man's disjointed moves and Panther Woman's licks and howls will be all you need to get this films best features.

Now for any Brits watching this absurd drivel the most memorable thing - and that really is saying something - will be the frequent repetition of the "Mastermind" theme tune. Otherwise, this is a completely forgettable piece of nonsense that sees a diver (John Ashley) kidnapped and taken to an island populated by creatures that would not look out of place in Madame Tussauds so that he can be experimented on by the evil "Dr. Gordon" (No, not the one from "Black Beauty"!). The results of his failed efforts are all over the place - indeed, the island actually has a real life "Mr. Tumness" and a sort of bat-man creature - oh, and don't forget "panther girl". It is preposterous at every level; the make up has been way too close to the big lights; the dialogue written in haste on the back of a stamp and the performances - especially from a very, very wooden Jan Merlin leave me wondering if Eddie Romero ever actually watched the scenes as he directed them...