The Couple Takes a Wife

Often, "The ABC Movie of the Week" broadcast movies that were actually pilots of television shows. Most of them were unsuccessful and the shows were never made and a few, such as "Kolchak: The Night Stalker", actually did make it from a movie of the week to a television series. "The Couple Takes a Wife" is a movie of the week that simply screams "bad TV sit-com pilot for a series that never got the green light"! Plus, it stars Bill Bixby...a guy who appeared in tons of television shows. And, it was directed by Jerry Paris--a guy who directed tons of TV shows and sitcoms (such as "The Dick Van Dyke Show" and "Happy Days").

When the film begins, Barbara Hamilton (Paula Prentiss) is thrilled to be going back to work. She wants a break from being a mom and loves the idea of working in the corporate world. But there's a problem...Mr. Hamilton (Bill Bixby) is a bit of a sexist and expects Barbara to not only work but keep house, cook and be ready for good lovin'...but there simply isn't enough of her left to do everything. So, they hit on the idea of hiring a 'second wife'...not for the sex, mind you, but to do everything else. She would be more than a maid or a governess or cook...she'd do it all and live with the Hamiltons. Can they find the perfect woman and make this strange arrangement actually work?! Well, maybe. Jennifer (Valerie Perrine) is not only willing to take on that role but actually wants to write up a marriage contract. And, as Bill Bixby says "Here's to polygamy!". What happens next...well, I don't wanna spoil it.

The 1970s were not nearly as permissive on TV as they are today. However, sexual innuendos were extremely common. So with shows like "Charlie's Angels" and "Three's Company", had they made a sitcom out of "The Couple Takes a Wife" would have fit into ABC's lineup very well. And the film is full of innuendo even though the plot is surprisingly innocent. So, while the second wife did NOT become a sex toy in any way, the term 'ménage à trois' was used several times and folks talked around the issue quite a bit. Titillating without necessarily exposing the audience to anything at the same time!

So is this odd film worth seeing? Well, it IS interesting and it says a lot about human nature and marriage. So, if you're only looking for a sex romp, you'll be disappointed...but otherwise it's kind of cute and enjoyable.

I saw "The Couple Takes a Wife" almost 40 years after its first broadcast. It was produced by Universal, a studio that for most of the 1950s and 1960s made very light romantic comedies about "issues threatening the bliss of the heterosexual couple" —mainly, staying a virgin before marriage or not, as Doris Day did in several of those WASP vehicles of hers; or occasionally, the emergence of a "new, professional, and liberated woman", as Abigal Page, the character Paula Prentiss played in Howard Hawks' "Man's Favorite Sport?" In a way, this TV film was a sort of continuation of Abigail Page's life: under a new name (Barbara Hamilton), she is again working for a public relations firm, but she has been happily married for a while and gave birth to two little girls. When the Hamiltons' maid has to go back to Guatemala, Barbara has an idea: they must hire not a maid but a wife (watch the subtle funny faces Prentiss does when she realizes what she has suggested). Of course, the plan backfires, things get thinly complicated (and "sexy"), but following the rules of broadcast TV, light comedy, and the remains of the Hays Code, Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton are too "conventional" —or so she says, but he nods—, faithful to each other, and things have to be worked out. Everybody is too silly in the script by Susan Silver (especially the "hired wife", played by Valerie Perrine), but Silver managed to make me laugh out loud a couple of times. I guess that was the idea... and that was Universal's: to offer a safe, hygienic, good time. In spite of Jerry Paris' invisible direction (or no-more-than adequate, clean, efficient mise-en-screen), Prentiss and Bill Bixby seem to enjoy playing husband and wife. They worked together so well that it's a pity they were not reunited again.