Blood Orgy of the She-Devils

BLOOD ORGY OF THE SHE DEVILS opens with a blood sacrifice, complete with the She Devil Dance Troupe, observed by Victor French lookalike, William Bagdad. Presided over by the wicked high priestess / medium, Mara (Lila Zaborin), much hocus is pocussed.

Mara can contact and become possessed by her "Indian guide" (!), or her Aunt Jessica (!!) at will. She is soon called upon by criminal types to kill off their enemies. Mara is double-crossed, leading to big trouble.

Directed by schlock guru, Ted V. Mikels, what could have been interesting is instead an experiment in tedious absurdity. Mara's hyena-like squawks, squeals, and shrieks during her seances simply must be heard, though some of her emitted sounds might damage eardrums. This is sub-sludge cinema at its putrid, dull best! A true brain mulcher.

Ms. Zaborin is unforgettable in her ludicrous role, even if you try to forget about it...

A powerful witch and her acolytes practice black magic and perform human sacrifices. This being a Ted V. Mikel's movie, I knew to not get my hopes up too high, and sure enough, the titular 'blood orgy', which comes at the end of the film, fails to impress: rather than a room full of naked, entwined, blood-drenched Satanists caught in the throes of ecstasy, we get a half-dozen women in fur bikinis doing a bad Pan's People dance routine to a bongo beat. Furthermore, the trippy opening credits accompanied by weird experimental electronic music, which suggest a wild, psychedelic piece of surreal cinema is in store for the viewer, are totally misleading: Mikel's direction is about as vanilla as it gets. It's lame, but at the same time the film possesses a naive schlocky charm that might make it endearing to fans of low-budget z-grade movies. And that's this film in a nutshell: it ain't going to wow the socks off anyone, but it's good for a few giggles if you're in the right mood. The best part of the whole film is definitely the hilarious seance that sees witch Mara (Lila Zaborin) channelling the voices of the dead, including a native American who speaks in clichéd 'Tonto talk': it's heap load of hokey silliness - me findum funny. Mara also provides sporadic laughs with her oft-repeated catchphrase 'As I will, so mote it be!' - you'll be saying it for weeks afterwards! A flashback to medieval times - clearly designed to cash in on the success of films like The Devils and Mark of the Devil - is clumsily handled by Mikels, his scenes of the burning and stoning of young women not nearly as nasty as those that inspired them. A rushed ending in which practitioners of white magic defeat Mara and her followers rounds off the film in unspectacular fashion.

I have to admit, this movie was not as bad as I thought it would've been. Now, it's no Dario Argento, but there is this underlying dark theme of witchcraft, occult, the black arts and the low budget quality is apparent. Plus, considering I've seen "Girl in Gold Boots" first, I thought this one scored higher (although Gold Boots has become a favorite laffer for me). The music and visual effects helped add a creepiness to the film. Mara as the head witch does scream a lot especially during the seance scene. The Indian guy reminded me of Tomy Chong. Tom Pace did not make as many goofy faces as usual and Leslie McRae (ROWR, yum yum!!) was just great to look at despite her so so acting (I think Ted agrees). Some flaws included the witch trial flashbacks with the men donning modern dress slacks (poor kid got whipped) and the fake bat. Good late night fodder.

T.V. Mikels movies often have outlandish plots and titles but the execution almost always lacks excitement. This PG-rated hokum about suburban occultism will have your mind wandering half way into it and fully asleep by the end. So what's good about it? I did like the electronic score and the harem of dancing girls swaying to a native bongo beat in their castle. Whoever played the head witch put some gusto into her performance but overall this movie is a real drag. Even more dull than watching this movie is watching it with Mikels' audio commentary on the DVD. If you've seen the episode of The Incredibly Strange Film Show on Mikels you know that he's a lovable eccentric but he barely says anything on the commentary.

Ted V. Mikels is sometimes lumped together with Ed Wood, Ray Dennis Steckler and Herschell Gordon Lewis as a director of good "bad" movies. This is incorrect. He makes BAD "bad" movies! They stink! Mikels is probably the only director who can take a trashtastic title like 'Blood Orgy of the She-Devils' and make it boring. In fact I sometimes think Mikels is responsible for the most boring movies ever made. Not arthouse Warhol/Antonioni/Tarkovsky "boring" (which I can appreciate), but looking-at-your-watch-every-ten-minutes boring. Now this is quite an achievement when you're dealing with potentially sensational material concerning witchcraft and political assassinations! I found this movie a chore to sit through. And no, there is no "blood orgy" and the "she-devils" dance a lot but keep their clothes on. Awful on every level.