Vulcan, fils de Jupiter

For folks who have no lives and avoid deep thinking, the sweaty Italian beefcake films of the late '50s/early '60s rank right up there with the Japanese "Godzilla" series and Mexican masked-wrestler epics as the ultimate in brainless entertainment. I'm not alone in this conclusion: Studies from Bulgaria in the 1970s provide the proof. They've got the data; let's not argue.

If you hanker for bad dubbing, rotten special effects, and ridiculous plot lines, this genre is your meat. Universally, they feature poorly staged action scenes - always a bad sign in action movies - and richly saturated color that jumps off the screen and toys sadistically with human eyeballs.

"Vulcan, Son of Jupiter" is a better-than-usual entry for one simple reason: There are a lot of half-naked women running around, too. Set in Bronze Age Greece, it details a war among the gods of Olympus over who's gonna snag the tail of Venus. Or Aphrodite - can't remember exactly; she's the Goddess of Love, anyway. There's fighting, infighting, scheming and a very brave midget. Chariots... yelling. Y'know.

It stars a guy named Rod Flash. Of course, that's his real name... And I'm Queen Wilhelmina of the Netherlands. Doesn't matter. He's got a bod that could sell a whooole lotta Blueboy subscriptions. In fact, I wonder how these guys manage stay so oily. Was there a pec-lubrication specialist on the set?

One bright spot is a beguiling showgirl-style dance by the astoundingly sexy Bella Cortez. Could any other woman so mesmerize with the gemstone jiggling in her navel? Whatever happened to this beautiful Cuban actress? At the end of her dance, the god Mercury shows up and tugs playfully at a jewel on her scanty costume; the quick gesture leaves a strangely potent erotic jolt.

Interestingly, most of the over-the-hill bodybuilders in peplum were Americans who hung out at Gold's Gym in Santa Monica. Gordon Scott actually had a brief Hollywood career - as the first Technicolor Tarzan. Steve Reeves was... well... he was in a Ed Wood film in the mid-'50s. Gordon Mitchell, who's in "Vulcan" and was a kind of poor man's Charlton Heston, was the best actor of the lot, with a career mostly in Italy lasting until the early 2000s (He played the catamite-hungry gladiator in Fellini's "Satyricon").

Trouble develops in Olympus when "Venus, the Goddess of Love" (Annie Gorassini) is scolded by her father, "Jupiter, the God of Lightning" (Furio Meniconi) for her promiscuous ways. To remedy this continual problem, Jupiter announces his intention to marry her off to either "Mars, the God of War" (Roger Browne) or "Vulcan, the God of Fire and Blacksmithing" (Iloosh Khoshabe). Yet rather than wait a month or so for Jupiter's decision, Venus decides to take matters into her own hands and joins with Mars and "Pluto, the God of Darkness" (Gordon Mitchell) in an attempted revolt. And since both Mars and Vulcan have been cast to earth pending Jupiter's determination, that's where Mars begins his disloyal operation. Now rather than reveal any more of this movie and risk spoiling it for those who haven't seen it, I will just say that this was an okay "Sword & Sandal" film for the most part. Unfortunately, it suffered greatly from being rather incoherent and confusing at times due to a lack of sufficient character development. It's also quite possible that the fact that this movie was originally produced in Italian and dubbed into English may not have helped either. Likewise, a few of the costumes could have used some improvement as well. On the plus side, I thought that both Annie Gorassini and Bella Cortez (as the sea nymph, "Aetna") were rather striking which certainly didn't hurt matters. Even so, neither of them were able to overcome the disjointed script or plot and as a result I rate this movie as slightly below average.

Once again, blue-eyed blonde Venus (Annie Gorassini) has fled from the Olympus to Earth - to enjoy the company of a man. Jupiter sends a dart against Adonis, who falls dead at Venus' feet. Mars insinuates that Jupiter is afraid of Venus, "the most beautiful woman on Earth". Juno, Jupiter's wife and Mercury insist with Jupiter (Furio Meniconi) that Venus herself should be punished. But Jupiter hesitates about to whom Venus should be married. Jupiter decides she shall marry her soon to one of the candidates: Maciste (Iloosh Khoshabe as Rod Flash), a mortal working in Vulcano's cave, and Mars (Roger Browne), the god of War. But when the two get into a fight about this, Jupiter postpones the decision; first they are both to live without their divine powers for two months as punishment. Then Mars abducts Venus, allied with Pluto and Eris, and works out a plan involving a bamboo tower high enough for the soldiers of the Thracian King to attack Jupiter in the high Olympus.

The movie starts really fun: At the beginning Vulcan has to go through on Earth is to deal with "lizardmen" who are normal people in the cheapest costumes. But after that, unfortunately, it goes steeply downhill. Funny encounters and fights are also missing; it's just enough to beat up a few cavemen. The "plan" of the villains never makes any decisive progress, so that they are degraded to a completely static existence, and Vulcan's ramblings also seem senseless and aimless. Here is a real peplum fight between giants of strength and evil. Usually, in peplums, the gods tend to be background characters, influencing and directing the destinies of the heroes of ancient times. This time, it is the opposite; a story about battles between the most powerful in the universe. The leading role was by the hunk Iloosh Khoshabe was born in in Iran (1932-2012). He was a mediocre actor, known for The Seven Tasks of Ali Baba (1962), The Invincible Brothers Maciste (1964) and Hercules, Samson & Ulysses (1963). Costars by Sword and Sandals regular Roger Browne who was a popular as well as untalented player at the time, a mediocre actor who couldn't carry a rickety product like this. He starred some spy movies , such as: Rififi in Amsterdam, Operazione poker, Operation Mogador and 'Superseven chiama Cairo' that was the previous entry of Superseven also directed by Lenzi. And special mention for the foloowing: the ever gorgeous Bella Cortez who shows off in the usual dance, in fact the Cuban Chelo was a cabaret artist when she was discovered for the cinema; the very beautiful and erotic Annie Gorassini (8½ by Fellini) , the American actor and bodybuilder Gordon Mitchell (Maciste the Colossus,), who starred in many Speghetti Westerns, and comic relief is provided by the little guy Salvatore Fumari who played several Peplum in similar roles.

Vulcano, figlio di Giove(1962) stans out the brilliant and luminous cinematography by Mario Parapetti shot on location in Iran and Lacio, Rome, Italy. As well as the evocative and catching musical score by Marcello Giombini. The motion picture was average but professionally directed by italian filmmaker Emmimmo Salvi .This craftsman wrote and directed all kinds of genres , such as : Peplum/Adventures : Seven Adventures of Ali Baba or Le 7 fatiche di Alì Babà , Titan versus Vulcanus , david and Goliath , Giant of Metropolis or Il gigante di Metropolis , Treasure of the Petrified Forest , Sinbad and the seven Saracens ; Spaghetti : Wanted Johnny Texas , Three bullets for Ringo ; Monster movie : Un gangster venuto da Brooklyn ; Eurospy : None But the Lonely Spy . Rating : 5.5/10. Regular but acceptable Peplum , only for hardcore aficionados and completists. It remains an overall unfortunately mediocre overall impression.

Venus, the goddess of beauty (Annie Gorassini) is at it again, cavorting with the sons of mortal men. This causes great consternation for her father, Jupiter. One of Venus' toy-boy titan's, Vulcan (Iloosh Khoshabe aka: Rod Flash) finds himself hurled to Earth, and caught up in all sorts of conflict between gods, humans, and lizard men!

VULCAN, SON OF JUPITER is an utterly preposterous movie that is nonetheless extremely entertaining. From the laughable lizard men, to the world's most annoying "little person", this movie is a riot! The final battle features the god, Mars vs. Vulcan showdown, as well as Venus vs. Aetna! Oh my!

Fans of Hercules, Samson, etc. Will probably love this...

The Roman Gods take center stage in this one with an old fashioned Olympic triangle taking place at the home of the Gods. Venus, the God of beauty and love is making a play for Vulcan and she's got him panting hot and heavy after her. That upsets Mars and Jupiter banishes all three to earth to sort it all out.

Vulcan finds himself a nice earthly mortal who rivals Venus for her beauty, but he still doesn't like Mars. And Mars has got himself a Tower of Babel like scheme whereby he allies himself with some earthly despots to build a tower as tall as Olympus. Can Vulcan stop him in time from challenging Jupiter himself?

The Greeks and Romans did not believe in one all seeing and all pervasive spirit like Deity. They liked their immortals with all the, dare I say it, human frailties built in. The idea for the film is an interesting one, but the roles would require some classically trained actors, not people who are used to peplum spectacles.