Le baron de la terreur

After five relatively straight Mexican horror films - and despite being aware of the camp value of this one - I wasn't prepared for the laugh riot that THE BRAINIAC turned out to be...though, in retrospect, I guess I ought to have known judging from the brief snippets from it in the Eurotika documentary on Mexican horror films (available on the Region 2 Mondo Macabro DVD of EL VAMPIRO [1957])!

Its defenders suggest that the film was intended as a spoof; I may agree about that, given the fact that director Urueta had helmed one of the starkest examples of the genre I've seen so far - THE WITCH'S MIRROR (1960) - but that still doesn't explain why it should have been so goofy and nonsensical!! The film's credit sequence utilizes some of the sketches seen in the prologue of THE WITCH'S MIRROR(!), followed by a reasonably atmospheric sorcerer's trial and burning - though even these scenes don't escape hilarity due to the absurdly elongated list of accuses read before the court, the constantly grinning Klansmen-like judges and guards (on whom the Baron eventually plays a childish supernatural prank!), and the outrageous Pope-like costume the victim is made to wear for his execution. The astrology sequences are, again, long-winded yet impossibly naïve (with all the professor's theories, when his assistant looks into the telescope and tells him there's no trace of the comet, the former suggests that its trajectory may be entirely different to his calculations - but, then, it takes the leading lady a split-second to locate it!).

The special effects are unbelievably cheesy - especially the stationary comet; even more ridiculous is the monster's make-up with its large pulsating head, pointed nose, forked protruding tongue, long scruffy hair and hose-like fingers (the scene where he swipes the clothes of his first victim and leaves the dead man in his underwear is hilarious)! The Baron returns to Earth obviously to exact revenge on his judges' descendants, though God only knows why he needs to turn into a hideous, brain-draining creature in order to do so - I guess, the film wouldn't have become such a cult item otherwise! - but he occasionally adds new victims (such as the girl in a bar - which we're supposed to believe that it all happens without the other people noticing anything! - and a streetwalker, a scene accompanied by some particularly sleazy jazz music) which, if anything, serve to pad out the running-time (but still amounting to a brief 77 minutes) given the thinness of the plot line!

Anyway, the Baron invites all his intended victims to his Gothic mansion - explained by a quick reference to a jewel robbery in a police procedural scene - complete with cadaverous butler (how he knew where to find them, to say nothing of the fact that any of them would accept an invitation from a perfect stranger, I guess, never even crossed the screenwriters' minds!): here we witness another hilarious moment as the faces of the Inquisitors are dissolved onto those of their descendants, presumably for us to note the kinship between them, but this is only apparent in three of the cases - and that's because the same actors are used! So, he insinuates himself into each of their households and, turning into the Brainiac, kills them all - save for the last member, obviously the heroine; another rib-cracking moment occurs here when he excuses himself to his guests (who have come to him rather than the other way around) - sitting on the sofa merely feet away - so as to go to the cupboard where he keeps his supply of brains in a jar and nibble from it (actually, he does this a number of times, on each occasion complaining of an old ailment for which he needs a special medicine!).

Comic relief is provided by the clumsy assistant (with a penchant for American slang) of bald-headed cop David Silva; they finally catch up with the fiendish Baron and arrive at his house armed with flamethrowers (one of which refuses to work!) and they fry him - though he never actually catches fire and, when he finally dissolves into a skeleton, parts of his body are inconspicuously missing!! However, for me, these are the five moments in the film which make it a camp classic: Abel Salazar laughing at his accusers in the opening trial sequence, and then turning serious all of a sudden when the Inquisitors throw him a severe look; the rock falling from the sky announcing the arrival of The Brainiac; German Robles' paralyzed look while the monster is feeding on his voluptuous daughter; Rene Cardona's similar gaze - but, this time, he seems to be doing his damnedest to suppress laughter!; and the corpse hanging upside down (face underwater) in the bathtub.

The supplements, even more than the other Casanegra releases, impart the fun that the film so obviously provides; as with THE WITCH'S MIRROR, the Audio Commentary itself is a gas - even if, in that film's case, the subtext was discussed as well while it's not here...but that's because there isn't any!! As I had never watched the film before, I couldn't compare it to previous editions; suffice to say that that the transfer isn't problematic save for the very last scene - where, for a couple of minutes, there's the presence of some distracting extraneous flickering (that's how I can best describe it!) that, in all the reviews of the disc I've come across, is mentioned only by DVD Savant.

For once, the outrageous image displayed on the DVD-cover isn't an exaggeration, as the titular Terror-Baron for some reason really does occasionally mutate into a hideous creature with the long split tongue of a lizard, the big pointy ears of a bat and tiny trunks for hands! I don't know why the Mexican film crew opted for this peculiar monster-design, but it sure is original and a very welcome change from all the usual vampires, witches, werewolves and masked serial killers. The movie atmospherically opens in the year 1661, with the extended and relentless trial against Baron Vitelius d'Estera, who's condemned for sorcery, necromancy and a whole shopping list of other vile crimes against humanity. As a comet passes on the night of his execution, the Baron swears he'll reincarnate within 300 years and extract his bloody vengeance against the descendants of the Inquisitors who burned him alive at the stake. Punctually three centuries later, a comet falls onto earth and the Baron lives again. Introducing himself as a charming and eloquent man, he seeks contact with the kin of his executioners and ingeniously sucks the brains out of their skull whilst they're hypnotized. "Brainiac" doesn't play in the same quality league as some other contemporary Mexican horror films (like "Curse of the Crying Woman" and "The Black Pit of Dr. M"), but it's a tremendously entertaining and competently made black & white chiller. The film is fast-paced and obviously borrowing a lot of style-elements from fellow Gothic classics. The film is also stuffed with ludicrous twists and tacky special effects, yet for some reason the tone remains serious. Even when the screenplay reverts to dreadful clichés and stereotypes, the actors speak their lines straight faced and without blinking. The idea of vengeance against descendants isn't exactly groundbreaking either, but at least the film never gets dull or repetitive! Probably thanks to the incredibly cool-looking Baron, whose appearance is indescribably far-out! "Brainiac" is one bizarre horror film - albeit not THE most bizarre ever, like the tagline proudly announces – and the hardcore cult fanatics among us definitely should purchase it.

A lot of films have taken on the "cult film" mantle in the past couple of decades. Many of them (i.e. BATTLEFIELD EARTH) are not the joyous exercise in pure "so bad it's good" glee that its followers claim. But, let us stake a claim that THE BRAINIAC deserves a place in that hall of fame.

Torture, the Inquisition, Comets, Astronomers, Barons, falling meteorites, serial stalking, a head-pulsing 300 year-old demon, and brains! Yup, that's a brief overview of the topics covered in the deliriously entertaining THE BRAINIAC! I had a chance to actually witness the indescribable movie on the big screen yesterday, and the audicence went wild. And hey, we get to see an evil serial killer munching on a plate of fresh brains 4 DECADES before Anthony Hopkins had his hors d'oevres in HANNIBAL!

Mexico, 1661: Baron Vitelius of Astara (Abel Salazar) is sentenced to death by the Mexican Inquisition for acts of heresy, witchcraft, necromancy and generally being annoying. As he is burnt alive and a comet passes overhead, the baron vows to return in 300 years to take revenge by killing Inquisitors' descendants. Sure enough, three centuries later the comet reappears, bringing with it the baron, who is able to change from human form into a hideous brainsucking monster.

The Brainiac features one of the goofiest movie monsters you're ever likely to see in a horror film, Mexican or otherwise, the wholly unconvincing creature having tubular quivering pincers, a pulsating hairy head, pointy rubber ears and nose, extra large fangs, and a forked tongue with which to suck out its victims' brains. But as hilarious as this monster is, it cannot make up for the film's dull plot, lifeless direction and cheap production values: printed backdrops stand in for real locations, the comet looks like a cut-out piece of paper stuck to a sheet of glass, and the baron's hypnotic gaze is achieved by shining a light into his eyes.

The film's best moment is the shocking discovery of a body suspended upside down in a bath-tub (the man's head underwater), although any scene featuring the voluptuous Rosa María Gallardo as astronomer Victoria Contreras is worth a look (she can calibrate my telescope any day of the week!); worst (and consequently funniest) moments include the arrival of the creature inside a rock, the baron sneaking off to tuck into his bowlful of brains, and the wide-eyed expressions on the faces of his mesmerized victims.

The Brainiac was one of the many monster and horror films to appear on Chiller Theater in New York in the early 60's. I also remember the photo of the "Brainiac" with that elongated tongue on Famous Monster trading cards of the same era. Poor special effects and cheesy dubbed dialog, but what the heck, this is one of those flicks you stayed up to watch for scares as a little kid and laughs as you got older. The Mexican horror/monster movie of this era is truly a lost film genre. Fun stuff!