Le Roi des dinosaures

First of all, let me clear up a frequently sighted misconception: only two brief scenes were taken from the 1940's "One Million, B.C.". The scene with a wooly mammoth trying to shake off the fake fur and another bit with a Komodo dragon sticking it's tongue out for the camera. THAT'S IT! All of the iguana scenes were filmed especially for "KING DINOSAUR".

This is an unbelievable time capsule of a movie. It has all of the popular science fiction elements: Space travel, dinosaurs, and atomic bombs. Filmed during a weekend at Bronson's Canyon in Hollywood, this bit of cinematic tripe should give hope to any aspiring film maker. The fact that it was produced and actually released in theaters is an amazement.

It only has a cast of four people (the other glimpses of humans are from military stock footage). The dialogue is ridiculous. The acting is poor. The handling of animals is cruel. The entire plot doesn't have a single thread of reality in it. If you view a particular scene with the salamander you'll see a human hand holding onto the reptile's tail. If you view the scene where the iguana is first encountered, you'll see the actress get her head shoved into a rock and wince in very real pain. You'll find dozens of contrived scenes and numerous examples of impossibilities that are shrugged off by the scientific quartet.

I love this movie! This film ranks up there with the Marx Brothers "Duck Soup" as one I could view repeatedly and not get bored. There is just something about it. It's the equivalent of a ten car pile-up on the freeway. You are dumbfounded by the carnage. You want to look away, but you can't. You see so much in such a brief time.

This is a perfect example of the "So bad it's good" movie genre. You'll catch small errors in continuity and fact through repeated viewings. Completely silly from start to finish without intending to be. The final line is bloated with irony. Did the lead actor mean for the line to be interpreted sarcastically or with pride? You be the judge!

Yes, it really is THAT bad. Armadillos and stock footage standing in as dinosaurs, V2 launch films run in reverse to depict a landing, nuking the new planet to save it... well, I could go on.

Godon's later films, expecially the "Amazing Colossal" movies, provide great guilty pleasures. King Dinosaur, however, can't even provide that. And I had to watch it five times to be certain. It's interesting mainly for what it said about the movie-going public of 1954.

COULD BE ON THE 100 WORST LIST.

I confess!

I liked this move when I first saw it.

(I was seven in 1955.)

As I recall, an asteroid had passed near the earth and made some stir in the news before this movie appeared. I suspected that was the inspiration of the plot.

(OK so THIS plot was NOT inspired in any way, shape or form. Waddaya gonna do, sue a seven year old kid?)

To a seven year old, an iguana propped up on its hind legs did a passable impersonation of a tyrannosaurus.

When I saw the movie again on MST3K, well, . . . . hey, I was seven and it was cool to me in the 1950s.

(Updt 19 Aug 2014: I found a copy of the 1957 World Book Annual Supplement (events of 1956) at the local book fair (the family 1955 World Book set w. supplements up to the 1960s was abandoned in a move in 1996). There it was: news of the near-earth asteroid Geographos discovered in 1951 named in 1956, predicted to pass 4 million miles from Earth in 1969. But barely 5 by 2 kilometers.)

The movie starts with the narrator rattling off dates like they matter. That's the best thing about this movie.

Scientists discover a new planet and decide to send an exploratory rocket with four scientists (two men and two women - how convenient) aboard. The planet closely resembles Earth with its breathable atmosphere, lush vegetation, and plethora of wildlife. The place seems simply ideal - that is, until they visit an island in the middle of a nearby lake. The island's inhabitants aren't as cute and cuddly as the lemur they've adopted and named Joe. The island is home to dinosaurs! Can our band of intrepid scientists escape the island before they become a snack?

One of the things I enjoy about 1950s sci-fi is that regardless of how bad or ridiculous a movie might be, these movies usually have a certain naive charm about them. That's not the case here. King Dinosaur has nothing that could remotely be called "charm". It's an abysmal mess. Even by Bert I. Gordon's standards it's a wretched movie (and if you're unfamiliar with Gordon's other works, those are some pretty low standards). The plot is pathetic. The acting is plain out pitiful. The depiction of the "scientists" and "science" is ludicrous. The special effects are a laugh-out-loud joke. The staged lizard/iguana/alligator fights are reprehensible. At least half the movie is composed of stock footage. And the movie is such a technical mess that I'm surprised this bunch of bozos was even able to get it on film. I'm racking my brain, but I've got absolutely nothing positive to say.

But the most ridiculous moment in King Dinosaur (and one of the most ridiculous moments in movie history) comes about 5 minutes before the movie's end. Before the four "scientists" leave the island, one of them says, "I brought the atom bomb. I think it's a good time to use it." Huh? What did he just say? You mean he's been carrying an atomic weapon around like a loaf of bread? Carrying around food, water, or . . . oh I don't know . . . scientific equipment might make sense, but an atom bomb? I could even see carrying some sort of small hand-held weapon for self defense, but a nuclear warhead? It's got to be one of the most ridiculous moments ever put on film.