- Judge Roy Bean: Mr. Harden, it's my duty to inform you that the larceny of an equine is a capital offense punishable by death, but you can rest assured that in this court, a horse thief always gets a fair trial before he's hung.
- Cole Harden: [to Bean] When I was a kid, I had a pet rattlesnake. I was fond of it, but I wouldn't turn my back on it.
- Judge Roy Bean: Shad Wilkins, you've been tried and found guilty of the most serious crime west of the Pecos, to wit: shooting a steer. Do you got anything to say for yourself before the sentence of the court is executed?
- Shad Wilkins: I told you they shot at me first. I didn't mean to kill that steer on purpose. I was aiming at the man.
- Judge Roy Bean: It's your bad luck you missed him. That's the trouble with you sodbusters... you can't shoot straight. Shad, may the Lord have mercy on your soul.
- Jane Ellen Mathews: You live in a house, don't you?
- Cole Harden: No. No, my house is all out there. One room, with a sky for a roof.
- The Stranger: Have you met Miss Langtry?
- Judge Roy Bean: No, I never met her. I never met the sun, I never shook hands with the moon, and I've never been introduced to no clouds.
- Judge Roy Bean: Are you an attorney, Miss?
- Jane Ellen Mathews: I'm as much an attorney as you are a judge!
- Wade Harper: We're goin' back to build our fences.
- Judge Roy Bean: If you do, you better build coffins with them. Now git!
- Cole Harden: You get warrants in Fort Davis, don't you?
- Judge Roy Bean: Yes, that's where they get 'em, but they don't know how to spell my name. It's been tried before.
- Cole Harden: I'll get one. This time you'll get what's comin' to you, Judge.
- Cole Harden: Can I give you a hand?
- Jane Ellen Mathews: Oh, no, thanks. Won't you sit down, please?
- Cole Harden: Well, I won't argue with you. If I had to wash dishes, I guess I'd give up eating.
- Jane Ellen Mathews: Oh Mr Harden!
- Cole Harden: Huh?
- Jane Ellen Mathews: [after a long pause] What a h... andsome man you are.
- Cole Harden: [after another long pause as he is taken aback] Well... I doubt that but I'm a tired one.