Never the Twain Shall Meet

We can all be grateful to Leslie Howard for warning us against the savage allures of sensuous, primitive peoples, and to value the civilised societies from which we come. Guard against the evils of miscegenation.

'Never the Twain Shall Meet' has an interesting cast and some nice moments, but on the whole it's pretty average, and you can do better. The film is a typical interracial island romance from the period, with the scion of a shipping magnate (Leslie Howard) running away from his job, family, and love interest (Karen Morley) to be with a Polynesian princess (Conchita Montenegro).

I have to say, it's a mixed bag with Montenegro. It's certainly nice to see the diversity, though as usual with Hollywood mixing up non-Caucasian cultures over the years, odd to see a Spanish actress playing a Polynesian. The combination of her over-acting and the silliness of her character, shown in a rather racist way as childish and simple, is grating. On the other hand, she smolders in her scenes on the island, for example, when she lies on a bed, arms stretched over her head, and gazes at Howard, telling him with her eyes to come take her.

There are also several aspects to the film that make it less enjoyable, starting with Howard caning Montenegro because she's sleeping around. Ah, the troubles of the poor white man - Morley is too cold for Howard, while Montenegro is too promiscuous, and the combination drives him to drink. At one point he longs for his old girlfriend, who is "clean and white." Whether it was intended to or not, the film carries with it a message of keeping to one's own race, resisting the temptations of exotic women and "island fever".

All of this gives a window into the time period, but the execution here is a little off, and the plot is too simple. If you're interested in this sort of film, I'd recommend White Shadows in the South Seas (1928) or Bird of Paradise (1932), which are both far better.

A young San Francisco shipping magnate learns that NEVER THE TWAIN SHALL MEET when he falls in love with a passionate South Seas maiden.

Celebrated MGM director W.S. Van Dyke took his love of foreign locales, mixed it with some stock footage of the Pacific Islands and created this obscure little pre-Code film which features fine performances embedded into a somewhat silly plot. There is more than a faint whiff of snobbish racism in the story which may interest modern viewers.

British actor Leslie Howard gets an emotional workout as the man jarringly confronted with his lover's unfamiliar culture; his slow dissipation is convincingly portrayed. Spanish teenager Conchita Montenegro gives an energetic & lively performance as the uninhibited child of nature who entices him to leave his wealth & position behind. Together they make a most interesting movie couple.

Marvelous old Sir C. Aubrey Smith steals his scenes as Howard's concerned father. Lovely Karen Morley plays Howard's emotionally aloof girlfriend; hearty Hale Hamilton is their arch reporter friend. Bearded Mitchell Lewis is most memorable in his one scene as a leprous sea captain; Clyde Cook adds some color as an English derelict on Miss Montenegro's island.

The phonograph which Miss Montenegro plays in her bamboo shack is a recording of 'Pagan Love Song' (by Nacio Herb Brown & Arthur Freed) which became a big hit when sung by Ramon Novarro a couple of years earlier in another film directed by Van Dyke, MGM's THE PAGAN (1929). Freed also composed the melody 'Islands of Love' which is heard throughout NEVER THE TWAIN SHALL MEET.

Aubrey Smith was in just EVERYTHING in the 1930s and 1940s. In our story, Dan (Leslie Howard) and Maisie (Karen Morley) are in love, and want to get married, but things start to happen that get in the way. Dan's old captain friend has a daughter Tamea ( Conchita Montenegro) that needs looking after. Montenegro was from Spain, and made films in the 1920s, 1930s, and 1940s. There's a wrench in the works when it turns out Tamea is spoiled rotten, and used to having her own way. She has fallen for Dan and is determined to get in the way of his plans. Leslie Howard was probably best known for Petrified Forest and Gone with the Wind. Died young when his plane was shot down by the germans during WW II. The film is pretty good... one of the exotic south sea adventure films at a time when most people didn't travel very far, so it had extra fascination. Mostly interesting because of the big hollywood names in it... Smith and Howard. It's also pre-code, so there are scenes in here that they couldn't show just a couple years later. Nothing too naughty by today's standard. There's a big scene near the end when the two women have it out over Dan. Director Woody van Dyke also croaked young in 1943, but that was by his own doing. He had been diagnosed with cancer, but his religion kept him from getting treatment.

With better writing, "Never the Twain Shall Meet" might have been a decent film. It might have also been a positive film in regard to race. However, the main character in the film comes off as so obnoxious and one-dimensional that it's really hard to watch this film. I found myself repeatedly contemplating turning off the movie and I am sure I am not in the minority on this one! The film begins with a shipping magnate (Leslie Howard) being given custody of a 'girl' who is part Polynesian. This girl is actually about 20--and so you can't help but laugh when Howard keeps treating Tamea (Conchita Montenegro) like a kid. As for Tamea, as I mentioned above, she is just plain obnoxious and about as subtle as a nudist at a Baptist picnic! She comes off less as a Polynesian in America and more like a dog in heat. I know that sounds crude, but she IS crude--and everyone in the movie EXCEPT Howard's character knows she is a horny she-demon (subtle...not!). And, she seems LESS at ease in America than Tarzan!! Now considering that she had an American father, you'd think she'd have SOME civility, manners and subtlety. Instead, she is a curious THING for the audience's amusement. So, while the MGM folks might have thought the film was progressive in the treatment of race (after all, having a romance between a White guy and half-Polynesian was pretty racy for 1931), it comes off as patronizing and dumb. What should he do with this dopey savage girl? Eventually, Howard FINALLY realizes that Tamea is one hot tomato and he does what any man would do in this situation--he gives up his career, moves to the South Pacific with her and becomes a beach bum! What's next? Who cares?! It's all just a silly mess.

As for Miss Montenegro, I felt a bit sorry for her in this film. I assume most of her lousy performance was because of the script and direction. How could ANYONE do this part well?! But somehow Leslie Howard came from this film unscathed--and when folks think of him today, they tend to remember him fondly for his role in "Gone With the Wind"--not this film turkey.