Snake Eyes

Having grown up with the "G. I. Joe" cartoons on TV and always liked them, I must say that my expectations for this 2021 movie "Snake Eyes: G. I. Joe Origins" weren't exactly sky high, given the previous live action movies based on the cartoons.

But still, of course I sat down to watch this movie and see what writers Evan Spiliotopoulos, Joe Shrapnel and Anna Waterhouse would come up with.

And while "Snake Eyes: G. I. Joe Origins" certainly was a watchable movie, this was essentially a no-brainer. You just disconnect your brain, lean back and munch the popcorn while watching the action on the screen. In terms of proper contents for a deeper storyline or a fulfilling storyline, then "Snake Eyes: G. I. Joe Origins" is not the movie you should watch. Nay, this was just mindless action with a "G. I. Joe" template dragged down over it to sell it to a wider audience.

I must admit that I sit here with a feeling of this being a rather unnecessary and unfulfilling movie, now that the movie came to an end. Sure, the movie was a cheesy action flick and watchable enough for what it turned out to be. But this was by no means an outstanding movie from director Robert Schwentke.

The action sequences in the movie are good, and they are what keeps the movie afloat. That, and also some nice visuals and special effects. But other than that, then this movie was a shallow shell.

The cast ensemble was interesting, though, I will say that much. I am not familiar with Henry Golding, but he did a good job at bringing Snake Eyes to life on the screen. And actor Andrew Koji was definitely a good choice for Stormshadow. Now, it was really great to see the likes of Iko Uwais and Haruka Abe in the movie as well.

I doubt that I will ever return to watch "Snake Eyes: G. I. Joe Origins" a second time, because the storyline just barely had enough contents to support the first viewing.

My rating of "Snake Eyes: G. I. Joe Origins" lands on a very mediocre five out of ten stars.

Characters try hard to be cool but end up being boring and weak.

Plot is all over the place, Snake Eyes is the weakest character in the movie but somehow he is the only one that triumphs.

Action is short and choppy, a massive fight is about to begin and then it last 3 seconds and cuts to some other scene and after that scene is over we go back to the fight scene which is also over, and that happens all the time.

When you have an actor like Iko and don't use him in a movie like this you are wasting potentialy excellent fight scenes.

Don't waste time and money on this DOA movie.

First of all, this has *nothing* to do with G. I. Joe, as it is a medieval story about two Japanese clans and the protagonist is caught somewhat in between. Yes, it happens today, but 90% of all fights are using swords and the prize of the war is a magical stone. It's like someone took an existing Japanese samurai and ninjas script, added an extraneous character and made him the protagonist, then plastered on a Joe/Cobra connection and brought it into the present. And the way they added this stuff is like fixing a broken mirror with industrial sticky tape on the visible side.

And what a cast this had: Andrew Koji from Warrior (I still crave for a new season), Iko Uwais from Raid, Peter Mensah from Spartacus, Takehiro Hira (who in my mind did the best job in the film, even if he was the villain and had a really dumb role), Samara Weaving from Guns Akimbo. Not to mention Eri Ishida, who did more in a few scenes than "Snake Eyes" in the entire film. They did nothing with all of this. The fights were fractured and made little sense, focused on form and ignoring substance. Two people fighting 50 and succeeding because they all used swords and the heroes had unlimited stamina, the usual running (slowly and awkwardly) from bullets scene, people running in the sword range to fire a gun, ugh! It was incredibly ugly. Even the motorcycle and car scenes were ridiculously bad. A team of 5 snipers could have finished *everybody* without loses.

Worst of all, it's called G. I. Joe Origins and it features a character who has never heard of the Joes in a time when both Cobra and Joes have been established for a long time. There is no origin story at all! There is no story, really!

Bottom line: this film is something that whole teams of people should be fired because of. A 100 million dollar film that manages to waste every resource it bought. Avoid it like it's the plague.

Great visuals ruined by terrible writing. Hollywood is a big place, where are all the good writers at? And why do people keep agreeing to go along with a film after reading a terrible screenplay? People need to start speaking up before the film is complete about the writing.

I saw this mainly cos of Iko Uwais n got terribly disappointed cos his footage is less n he doesnt get to kick ass.

Then i thot lets just enjoy the action but then again none of the fight scenes are noteworthy.

Recently i saw Lee's Fist of Fury n i loved the Japanese garden. This movie too has some some beautiful gardens, lakes, hill tops houses, etc.

The editing ruined everything.

Cos of the shaky cam n fast cut editing, one cannot make out what is going on during the fight scenes.

The character of Snake Eyes is more spiteful n the character of Shadow Storm more sympathetic.

How conveniently the clan n the Major Scarlett work together with Baroness, a Cobra member.

Also how easily Snake Eyes forgives his dad's murderer n after that fight alongside Baroness inspite of knowing that Cobra gang gave the orders to eliminate his dad.

I miss those old ninja movies man.