The Necromancer

The premise in itself is interesting. The script, the utterly insipid, simplistic dialogues and the amateurish acting (on a level with that of a not-so-brilliant high school troupe), paired with special effects clearly inspired by Pan's Labyrinth (albeit the version you'd expect elementary school children to make for themselves for Halloween) soon make it hard to keep a straight face.

Add to that a complete disregard for period detail and wigs so visibly artificial that you expect a label sticking out of them saying '100% polyester' and you wouldn't be surprised if one of the characters were to check his messages on an Apple Watch on screen.

Makes you wonder what the jury's standards are at the Bristol Festival. The real horror is thinking about what the other films presented will have been like if this is the winner.

I must admit that I was instantly lured in by the title of the movie, I mean, "The Necromancer", it just doesn't get much more ominous than that. And being an avid horror fan, of course I sat down for watching this 2018 movie from writer and director Stuart Brennan.

While I did manage to sit through the entire ordeal that is "The Necromancer", I can in all honesty say that I wasn't particularly entertained, much less impressed with what transpired on the screen. And why is that?

Well, first of all, the movie is slow paced with very little of any great interest happening throughout the course of the entire movie. This was essentially just watching a group of grown men dressed up in old uniforms and do cosplay in the great forest, accompanied by some questionable camerawork.

Sure, I will say that the props and costumes were quite good, and that really worked in favor of the movie, and the production level was good as well, but this was hardly enough to make up for a total lack of an adequately entertaining storyline and script.

The acting in the movie was dubious, so you shouldn't get your expectations up for experiencing anything grand or Shakespearian here. But then again, the actors and actresses literally had nothing to work with from the script.

As for the characters, well they were flaccid and rather faceless. You don't really form any bond with any of them, and you just watch the torment inflicted upon them, shrug and move on, waiting for the next one to be targeted by the sinister force in the forest.

Then when the necromancer was finally revealed towards the end of the movie, you just stare in disbelief and go 'seriously? They opted for that?'. It was such an anti-climatic reveal that didn't work out well for the movie, which was already struggling with a losing uphill battle.

While the intentions behind "The Necromancer" were good and interesting, the movie just didn't translate well from script to screen, and this is not a movie that I would recommend you spend your time, money or effort on. Some of us did, and suffered through it, so you don't have to.

My rating of "The Necromancer" is a mere three out of ten stars.

This film is so terrible. I couldn't work out if an actor in a moderately central role was giving the worst performance I've ever seen on the big screen or whether he was poorly served with some of the worst writing. So poorly edited it was jarring. One positive would be it sets the bar for bad films to be measured against.

Well that's 90 minutes I won't get back. What a crock of crap. I had high hopes for this film but was sorely disappointed.

Bad acting and weird accents. There were a few good bits but they were few and far between. I found myself questioning the production and costumes as the film was so poor. Not recommended.

This is the cinematic equivalent of self harm (or overly dramatic munching on pinecones - spoiler) Horrendously bad, but at least it's inspired some of the most disingenuous and laughable reviews written by the cast and their friends.

If you want an insight into delusion, watch it and then read the reviews.