- Lenny Leonard: [Talking to secret agent Carl] How did things go in Prague?
- Carl Carlson: I cancelled a few czechs.
- Bart Simpson: [Being chased by bullies] Violence never solved anything.
- Kearney Zzyzwicz: Don't use math on us.
- Lisa Simpson: [at Janey's funeral and burial ceremony] Why? why did my best friend have to die?
- [She sobs a bit]
- Lisa Simpson: I mean, it's a great college essay, but it's just not worth it."
- [first lines]
- Bart Simpson: Dad, why are you taking us Christmas tree shopping on Halloween?
- Homer Simpson: Because in America, everything's way too early.
- Homer Simpson: [uncovering 'Ivanka 2028' breast badge] See?