THE BROKEN KEY has an abysmaly bad reputation. It has an appalling score of 2,3 but still 416 ratings so, it will never make the Bottom 100 (the list of the worst rated and reviewed movies of all time that have at least 10,000 ratings). And, despite the poster features all the known names the lead is played by an unknown that has never made movies before and is known only in Italy (where I live) for having appeared in a trashy reality TV show that is followed by rotten-brained people. So why I saw it? Well, from time to time I love to find and watch movies with notoriously bad reputations. But this... it was too much, and according to most of the reviews I am one of the very few that had the guts of seeing it to the very end! Now I can discuss it.
It begins with very overlong credits where the italian names are put first, then we see the Pyramid of Giza and the on-screen text says 'Egypt, tomorrow' and we then move to Rome and it says 'Rome, 2033 AD'. We then see Hiram Abif (Franco Nero, the father of director Louis Nero) having a swim and then has problems (considering that Nero was 75 when he did this, it's no surprise) and has to be taken on surface. We are then introduced to our lead Arthur J Adams (Andrea Cocco) that meets scientist Adrian Moonlight (Rutger Hauer) and is tasked of finding the broken key and open a mysterious gate. Arthur goes, and his mission will go not without meeting various characters and bizarre situations. First he goes to a class held by writer Tullio De Marco (Michael Madsen) about the importance of paper, and after only 2 minutes of screen time we see Tullio hanging from a bridge. Second, he goes to count Rosebud (Christopher Lambert) that is an expert on the female body that has spme sort of metamorphosis where he becomes older and is then nowhere to be seen. Third, he goes to an abbey where Father Hugo (William Baldwin) tells Arthur about all the secrets of the text, and it's then shot by some marauders. After lots of padding Arthur will meet the older woman (Geraldine Chaplin) that will give him the Broken Key for opening the Zimurg Corporation, but I think nobody would see it.
To saying that THE BROKEN KEY is bad is certainly an understatement. The sets are great but the acting by the lead so heavy and the known names appear for just a few minutes and then they are nowhere to be seen, and you might think that with such respected names it would have been at least a decent viewing experience but nope, they put lots of unnecessary padding that made the movie last 2 hours and 15 minutes of absolute nonsense. The more the time passes the more you are bound to leave it, and I think I should deserve a medal for having seeing it to the very end! And the music is not only forgettable, but jarring as most of the other problems of the movie.
Overall, a movie so bad that it makes you ask why it was even made in the first place, but as it was over, I could see why it will always miss being in the Bottom 100... I am probably the only one who dared to finish it! If someone you know recommends it to you... run! Even for gluttons for punishments like me (that I had to take this task on my shoulders) is like a ride to the dark world. And don't say I didn't warn you!
