Texas Voodoo Zombies

After getting released from prison, a loser trying to go straight in life finds out that his friend has a special pest extermination business and joins in, but when he spurns an ex's advances he soon finds the neighborhood overrun by vicious zombies and must try to get out of the area alive.

This was a wholly underwhelming effort. One of the main issues here is the exceptionally overlong and unneeded setup that takes way too long to get going. There's very little interest here in what's going on for most of the first half here, running through the various series of his antics and conditions of being out on the streets, and the fact that there's so much him bouncing around to so many locations with so many people really starts this off on a bland note. That also leads into the fact that there's so little horror here that this one doesn't really feel like a genre effort until well over an hour. The complete lack of action here, coming from us focusing on him running around the neighborhood trying to get one over on his parole officer by faking work, taking odd jobs or meeting up with friends while he complains about his working conditions that hardly anything really happens until the hour mark. This one takes its time to get to the outbreak by being so unconcerned with even giving any motivation for unleashing the zombies so that the frantic action and gore we get of them running around the hood dispatching the creatures seem all the more exciting. Still, even that's another huge problem here in that so much of the horror scenes are so inept that it's comical more than scary. The fact that he still plays a bumbling fool who really has a hard time fending for himself which simply shows him to be a bumbling buffoon at the time when we're not supposed to laugh. By focusing on the comedic aspects of this one during the time we're not getting any kind of reasoning why we should be fearful of the zombies, especially with the way the low-budget creeps into this one and ruins a lot of the zombie action as the silly-looking zombie makeup really undermines the attempts at scares. Even with the twist ending that undermines the whole effort and makes the zombie outbreak pointless anyway, the fact that none of this is competently planned makes for a troubling time here.

Rated Unrated/R: Graphic Violence and Graphic Language.

Making a B-grade film is hard to achieve successfully and having the audience on board with its lunacy. When it doesn't work, the film crashes and burns, but could turn into a entertaining train wreck. Then there are films like Texas Voodoo Zombies, where it starts like it could be laughably bad, but migrates into a misogynistic unfunny horror comedy.

The film follows Doobie Jones, a man on parole trying to find employment to avoid jail time. He decides to bring friends over for a party when he "accidentally" drops a entire box of rat poison in some food for the guests. Soon, the guests turn into zombies and they must stop them from a "Zombie Hoodpocalypse".

The sad thing is the only 2 funny things in the movie is a picture in a frame that randomly changes reactions and a ridiculous moment involving the Michael Jackson Thriller dance, however that doesn't make up for the fact these moments happen over a hour into a 97 minute movie.

The films biggest fault is the director thinks everything Doobie says it's funny, but instead he comes off as a immature man child that makes him almost unbearable to watch at times. What makes it worse is almost every scene has Doobie in the film, so that weighs the films fun factor down HARD. Literally every female character is Also the dialogue is riddled with unnecessary exposition every time people talk to one another, and topped with wooden acting from every single character on screen. All of the female characters have no characterization other than sexualized almost portrayed as objects for Doobie and the other males.

Texas Voodoo Zombies has one isolated funny moment but doesn't make up for the other 96 frustrating minutes. The dialogue is awful and the acting is even worse and has a very sexist mindset. To put it simply, this film is dead on arrival with no soul in sight.

Rating: 1.7 / 10