Bad Boa's

I went into *Almost Cops* expecting a dumb comedy with some cheap laughs-but I wasn't prepared for just how painfully bad this movie actually is. It's not just unfunny-it's aggressively annoying. The plot makes no sense, the jokes fall flat every time, and the acting feels like a school play gone off the rails.

The characters are caricatures with no depth, the pacing is a mess, and there are moments that feel like they were improvised by people who have never told a joke in their lives. It tries so hard to be edgy or "random" that it ends up being nothing but cringe. I kept waiting for it to get better. It never did.

By the end, I was just angry I wasted my time. There are bad movies-and then there's *Almost Cops*. Easily the worst movie I've ever seen. I wouldn't even recommend it as a "so bad" it's good" watch. It's just bad. 1 star, and that's being generous.

This film is nothing more than a PR stunt to make the Dutch BOA system look good. BOAs (Special Enforcement Officers) were never meant to assist police - they were created to replace them because they're cheaper and send fine money straight to local governments. They can't use force, can't make arrests, and mostly hand out petty fines for things like cycling in city centers or parking errors.

Almost Cops tries to paint BOAs as lovable underdogs, but it completely ignores the truth: BOAs are powerless, widely disrespected, and symbolize a broken system focused on revenue, not safety. Dressing that up in comedy doesn't fix the problem.

It has a few funny moments, I won't deny it. But if you're looking for a comedy that makes you laugh non-stop, you better look elsewhere. Almost Cops tries to be many things at once-action, drama, satire, social commentary-and ends up being none of them. The whole thing feels like a movie that doesn't know who it's for or what tone it wants to keep. One moment it's trying to critique police corruption, and the next it's making poop jokes. It doesn't add up.

The main duo works... sometimes. The chemistry between Ramón and Jack could've been much better if the script weren't filled with clichés and recycled twists. Most of the humor feels forced or straight-up childish. And worst of all: there are scenes that aim for seriousness, but neither the pacing nor the visual style supports it. The direction never finds the right tone, and the story lurches forward with choppy editing, flat dialogue, and ridiculous action scenes.

The Rotterdam setting is totally wasted. They could've leaned into the local context or real social dynamics, but instead, they chose to copy American formulas with zero personality. There's nothing here that makes it stand out or feel rooted in a specific place. This could've been shot anywhere and it wouldn't have made a difference.

What's really sad is that you can sense there was a message behind it all: some social critique, an attempt to show that the lowest-ranking officers are often the ones closest to the people. But it's so poorly executed that it doesn't move, doesn't hit, doesn't leave any mark. It's a missed opportunity-a sloppy mix of genres and references that steps all over itself.

In short: there are a couple of moments that might make you smile, but this is a messy, aimless, and boring film. One of those comedies that simply isn't funny, that promises thrills but delivers apathy. If Netflix is going to keep betting on international productions, they better back stronger ones. Because this one... this one's a mess.

This is a result of a filmmaker who doesnt know what movie to make. One moment you watch a spoof with potential, the next moment it is bad action movie. Sure, it is possible to shoot a funny action movie, but that would mean you have funny action scenes and not one moment of comedy, one moment of action. The action scenes were mediocre, acting mostly bad, but I did had to laugh a little once and a while. The idea to created a movie about BOA's was great, it really was. But the writers and director should have done some investigation to the real tasks of a BOA. One finale point of criticism. The Netherlands do have good actors. Really they do exist. But why are always the same bad actors casted. For instance Teun Kuilvoer. He is always casted for a bad boy character, but is one of the worst Dutch actors exists.

I really wanted to like Almost Cops. The premise seemed entertaining, the humor felt familiar, and the story had potential. But unfortunately, this movie is yet another example of why Dutch cinema struggles to be taken seriously at times.

The first half hour already made it clear: the writing is okay, some of the jokes are genuinely funny, and the setup has promise. But all of that falls completely flat because of one fatal flaw; the acting.

The performances are so painfully bad that they pull you out of the story again and again. There's no authenticity, no rhythm, no believability. Scenes that were meant to be funny or moving end up feeling awkward and forced. The actors deliver their lines like they're reading from cue cards for the first time. And that's a shame, because the plot actually had something going for it.

In fact, this seems to be a recurring problem in Dutch comedy films. Without strong, believable performances, even decent scripts crumble into something resembling parody. Instead of building a strong cinematic culture, films like Almost Cops drag it down further, turning potentially entertaining ideas into embarrassing misses.

I've sat through the Bon Bini movies too and I only endured them because of Phi Nguyen (Ping Ping), who's genuinely funny and has charisma. He's the kind of actor who should be given more serious roles or even his own film. Give us a Dutch The Saint with Phi Nguyen; now that's something I'd show up for.

But until the Dutch film industry starts demanding more from its casting and acting direction, we're going to keep getting films like Almost Cops; lazy, disappointing, and worse, forgettable.

Dear Dutch filmmakers: the audience deserves better than this. Please give us movies we can actually be proud of.