Finding Jesus

Yup, it's another good old classic feeling of WOWNow Entertainment, where you watch the bad movements and with the worst disappointments than any movie. Let's come to this part... this... is... horrible.

How come you might ask? I am not super religious nor a Christian, but I still am offended how they literally tried to mock a Japanese sushi fish... you heard me right... a sushi fish... ugh. It sure is understandable how they need more cash but obviously, you can't get money from that Christian movie. Thus, the whole movie gets a sequel... what a "big" surprise.

Genuinely offended in short both from this and the sequel, not recommending you all to watch them.

Calling this film a drug trip wouldn't even be fair because drug trips are fun and this movie isn't. If I showed this movie to my child, he would call Child Protective Services on me and I honestly wouldn't blame him.

I lack the words to accurately describe just how all-encompassingly wretched this movie is. It's the sort of thing that Clive Barker would lock in a trunk and spend the rest of his life trying to forget about. It's the nightmare that student animators fear they will be contracted to make and then be remembered for. It's the result of dozens of minds engaging with source materials and art assets in a brave attempt to not only make something less than the sum of its parts, but somehow it amounts to even less than the value of any individual part.

I don't like this movie very much.

You know when you have some random depression rabbit-punch you in the the chest and make you wish there was a building taller than your one-story house that you could throw yourself off of? This was the cause of it.

Dear reader, I would like to state the immense feeling of utter dread and pain that this movie made me feel inside mine human heart. I cannot even fathom the amount of brain cells that have died utter dreadful and painful deaths inside mine brain. I shall now proceed to jump outside my window in the hope that Jesus will save me from this complete and utter abomination. Yours truly, A broken man.