Serment mortel

This film is nothing original.

But then what teenage slasher film is. And for that reason only I give this film 7 out of 10. I feel giving a movie of this style a poor review is cutting it short for the credit it should get. It is well shot, the death sequences are well put together and inventive, there are the comical moments, characters you hate and can't wait to meet there makers and the who is the murderer guessing game.

Don't get me wrong the film is not special, it's no Oscar nominee and has so many plot holes it is swiss cheese but what you do get is a fun slasher flick that won't let you down as long as you don't expect too much from it.

Sorority Row, a 2009 horror-thriller directed by Stewart Hendler, follows a group of sorority sisters who become the target of a masked killer after covering up an accidental death. The film stars Briana Evigan, Rumer Willis, and Carrie Fisher, and while it boasts a cast with potential, the movie often falls into the clichés typical of the slasher genre. Despite its predictable plot and standard jump scares, Sorority Row delivers some effective suspense and a few memorable moments of tension. The film's commentary on sisterhood and guilt adds a layer of depth, but ultimately, it relies heavily on formulaic horror tropes. Fans of classic slasher films might find it a fun, if unremarkable, addition to the genre. But if you're simply looking for a fun cheesy horror, then perhaps this could be something you'd enjoy.

So another horror remake? Shocker ... though not exactly literally. What it is though is beautiful. Especially if you do like women. There is not much acting necessary (which doesn't imply the people involved are not able to do so), just having to look good and scared. All of them are good in that regard.

I haven't seen the original (or I don't remember it?), but the premise is pretty simple. As another reviewer wrote, you could say, just another slasher. The effects/murders are pretty good, so you get your moneys worth from that. Thrills are decent enough, though you do know where it is heading and characters still "act" dumb/irrational, as they always do in those movies

With it's excessively asinine plot, crazy killer armed with a particularly impractical weapon (a modified tire iron), exaggerated death scenes, a larger-than-normal quota of bitchy, big breasted bimbos (including the obligatory sexy nerd) and their equally obnoxious boyfriends, and a fair smattering of gratuitous nudity, I'm pretty certain that Sorority Row was intended by its makers to parody the countless, moronic, teen slasher remakes that have blighted horror in recent years. However, it appears that their motive may have been lost on many viewers, who seem to have mistaken the deliberate playing up of genre stereotypes and intentional over-use of dumb clichés for a case of plain, old-fashioned bad movie-making—something which there has been plenty of over the last decade or so.

It's a shame, because when armed with the knowledge that much of the film's apparent awfulness is by design, one can have quite a bit of fun with Sorority Row.

The film opens with one of those frat parties that only ever seem to happen in the movies (or maybe I just went to the wrong parties): it's thumping with the latest cool tunes, heaving with physically perfect specimens of both sexes indulging in all manner of hedonistic activities, and overflowing with an endless supply of alcohol. Whilst the gorgeous revellers bump, grind and get wasted, six sexy sorority sisters carry out a mean prank that will have disastrous results: they con a poor schmuck into believing that he has accidentally killed his ex-girlfriend Megan by plying her with drugs. Carrying the joke a little too far, they also convince him that it would be a good idea to hide his crime by pushing her body into a lake located near a disused mine. Unfortunately, before they can reveal that it is all a sick joke, events spiral out of control, and Megan winds up dying for real when the guy plunges a tire iron into her chest (to let the air out of her lungs so that she will sink). Now the group are forced to dispose of a genuine corpse—opting to dump their dead friend down the mine-shaft.

A year later, as the girls celebrate their graduation, a hooded murderer is busy at work on the campus. Is it Megan, back from the dead for revenge, or does someone else have a motive for the rapidly rising body count?

What follows is undeniably silly, but as I have said, when viewed with the right frame of mind, it's also rather enjoyable; one can have fun spotting the deliberate attempts by the makers to ridicule the more idiotic conventions of the genre (the over privileged students, the stern but protective den mother, the innocent girl who unwillingly goes along with her friends' plans) whilst also revelling in the brutal violence, ogling the many attractive women, cheering on a shotgun toting Carrie Fisher, and marvelling at just how much Rumer Willis sounds like her mother.

It's not a brilliant piece of film-making (if it was, the parodic content would have been obvious to all), but it's not nearly as dreadful as many might have you believe. I rate Sorority Row a reasonable 6/10. Give it a chance.

Sorority Row seems to be receiving a lot of bad press for the same reasons that all slasher flicks seem to garner - it's clichéd, the characters aren't likable, the plot isn't handled well, the set-up is botched, blah blah blah. OK, these ARE fair points - there exists within this movie one too many "Hello, is anybody there?" moments, too many "Don't go in there!" moments, and let's be honest, they could have quite happily pinned the entire thing on someone else and gone to police instead of covering it up.

However, to complain about those things would be to complain about the entire purpose of the slasher genre. Besides Scream, Hallowe'en and Black Christmas, there is not a single slasher that has a shred of believability (and even Hallowe'en doesn't - Michael Myers is the boogie man for goodness sake!). We go to see slasher films to watch people get killed and don't pretend otherwise. These situations do not happen in real life, why expect any level of realism in the film?!?

So why bother going to see this? Primarily, for the kills. Out of the 10 or so murders, I'd say but only 3 are gratuitous and 2 of those are badly set up. Again, it's the same old story of bimbo/drunk frat boy wandering where they should know not to. But for the 7 or so others, they rock! The manslaughter at the beginning is pretty twisted, yet I, and many others got satisfaction watching one of those twits from The Hills getting offed and thrown down a mine shaft. Following on, a "pimped up" tyre iron is implemented to cause as much gore and depravity as possible: bottles, mirror shards, cars, flare guns, axes, fire-extinguishers, shotguns and the bird cane from the original all are used at some point to bring the death count to a total Rambo would be proud of. One of my favourite set-ups in the movie comes after the party, when they are aware that somehow, someone knows about their little secret. In an intense scene involving many bubbles - because in the World of the Greek Letters, you are more likely to find a jacuzzi than a room full of mannequins - one of the 5 get caught out in it. The build up ranks with that of Annie in Halloween or CC in Scream 2 - after the girls receive another threatening text, they realise that one of their names was missing from the list and before they know it, the missing girl is running, screaming through the courtyard towards them. Although the scares are few and far between, that scene had me ducking. The murder weapon, that tyre iron, is set to become iconic if it garners any sequels (which, undoubtedly it will).

The main characters may not be the most interesting, and two of the girls really are just plain boring, but there are 3 who stand out in my mind: Jessica, Cassie and Ellie. Jessica, the bitchy queen, is played with fervour by Leah Pipes: she relishes every mean phrase, never misses a chance to put someone down, and when she stumbles across the dead body of a sorority sister, her first remark is "God, she looks terrible!" delivered with a dead pan attitude that just rocked. The fact that, unfortunately, she is governed by a bloke is a shame, but she redeems herself towards the end, staying true to her bitchy, selfish nature. Ellie, although a walking cliché in a horror movie, is played really rather well by Rumer Willis. A girl falling apart at the seams as she tries to cope with her part in the accident, she goes from slightly shaky to worried to paranoid to hysterical to catatonic. Yet she maintains some integrity and humour and has quite possibly the funniest moment during which the girls are trying to stop her from finding out that Megan just might not be dead. Finally, Briana Evigans is such fun to watch. Although her character has no right to feel better about herself over what happened and she certainly is no Sydney Prescott or Laurie Strode, Briana brings out of Cassie a feisty, tough girl who can actually be rooted for towards the end. The other 2 VERY good reasons to watch this movie are as follows: gratuitous cat fights (in a burning house with a psycho killer running around none-the-less!) and Carrie Fisher blowing her kitchen to smithereens with a shot gun, all the while taunting the masked killer with lines such as "Come to Mama."

All in all, Sorority Row is not a good film but it is sheer entertainment. What it lacks in plot and credibility it more than makes up for in style. it's also the first remake that I've had pleasure watching due to it's total carelessness of where it's origins lie. I'd give it 6 out of 10. (yes I am aware I've awarded it 10 out of 10 but that's because I feel bad that morons would mark it so harsh on its lack of plot... seriously)