Mad Cowgirl

What a damn shame! Never before I encountered a movie with such potentially brilliant story ideas, and yet somehow it ended up being an indescribably irritating and tragically dull mess! The main character, as well as most of the supportive ones, is probably the most fascinatingly eccentric person to ever lead a modern horror adventure and the situations she encounters are inventive and freaky as hell. Sounds terrific, but then what went wrong? I tell you what went wrong; director Gregory Hatanaka keeps on interrupting his own fabulous concepts with pseudo-artistic nagging and visual gimmicks that totally ruin the pace and the low-budget exploitation atmosphere. The young, intelligent and sexy Therese is the ideal woman. Therese is a nymphomaniac, desperately in love with a sinister TV-evangelist, but she also won't say no to some lesbian sex or even an incestuous relationship with her crazy brother Thierry. She's a food inspector and he imports meat of questionable quality standards. Convinced she's infected with the Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease after eating one of her brother's Canadian steaks; Therese slowly loses her mind and starts to believe she's the Kung-Fu fighting heroine of her own favorite grindhouse movie "The Girl with the Thunderbolt Kick". The plot is so demented it becomes brilliant, like Tarantino on acid, especially when Therese considers herself to be on a mission to annihilate the Ten Tigers of Kwan Tang, or whatever they're called. It's a really regrettable to announce that – according to me personally, at least – the ingeniousness of the plot is brought down by experimental editing, exaggeratedly hectic camera-work and the director's super massive ego. "Mad Cowgirl" is gory, sleazy and surrealistic, but it quite isn't the homage to rancid 70's exploitation director Hatanaka intended it to be. It's more reminiscent to Gregg Araki's "The Doom Generation", only with even more nastiness and dementia. Sarah Lassez is a rather talented young actress and I hope she'll be offered some better screenplays in the near future. Young cult icon and inexplicably cool dude James Duval is his usual confused self as Therese's brother and I'm sure nobody expected Star Trek veteran Walter Koenig to appear in a production like this, and definitely not in the unconventional role of uncanny TV-preacher. The film contains loads of unexplained – but rather fascinating – little elements, like some of Therese's acquaintances speaking foreign languages (and she being able to understand them) and brief flashes of Japanese news reports. Weird … but too obviously wannabe-intellectual for no reason. "Mad Cowgirl" has quite a large fan-base and the most fanatic admirers will probably claim that I completely don't understand the underlying brilliance of Hatanka's filming style, but whatever. The film could have been much better.

Oh my God! This is one of the worst movies I have ever seen. It is nothing but a continuous string of incoherent flashes of random images. This is a very low point in cinema history.

I gave up on the movie not even halfway through it. I couldn't stand the torture anymore. There was too much dribble and showing things that had nothing much to do with the main story.

And the acting in this movie, non-existent! It was horrendous at best. And the movie comes with stupid dialogue to go along with the lack of portraying any acting.

The cover looked promising, but just goes to prove that looks can be deceiving.

I advice you to stay well clear of this movie unless you like the type of movies that make little sense and just go on an on forever without getting anyway.

In MAD COWGIRL, a kung fu-loving, incestuous, preacher-dating meat inspector named Therese (Sarah Lassez) goes on a long descent into madness, when it clicks in her head that she's TV's "Girl With The Thunderbolt Kick". On a mission to destroy her enemies, bloody horror erupts. Sort of.

In a weird, convoluted way. This could / should have been a classic. Disturbingly, it grinds on forever, going nowhere, causing actual CJD (the human variant of Mad Cow Disease) in the viewer. Watching the entire movie unfold, one can feel the holes developing in the brain. This mind-vaporizing movie is simply too lethal to recommend! Walter Koenig is pretty good as the slimy Pastor Dylan, and could induce a sort of anti-salvation in the viewer. So, split the difference...

Watching this movie my first thought was "Was that guy on Star Trek?" And my last thought was "I gotta get outta here!" It's probably not fair for me to critique this movie since I did not see the whole thing. That said, let me warn anyone who is thinking of seeing it that this is not a "regular" movie. By this I mean one that generally has a clear path or plot development that you can follow (or want to follow) from beginning to end. It has an off-beat independent film look and feel to it. Maybe it is. I didn't care enough to take 2 minutes to check.

No one in this movie seemed to have their head screwed on tightly. They all seemed as dysfunctional as the script which seemed to randomly stitch scenes together and toss images at you, with the recurring theme of the lead character bestially gorging herself on meat. Less anyone get the wrong impression, I am not without range: I do like SOME "quirky" and "offbeat" films and support experimental and independent film making. I believe they serve a good purpose towards the expanded expression and development of the art and human consciousness. I just "personally" couldn't get into this one.

Finally, for me this movie was like a long walk that was taking me nowhere (or nowhere I wanted to go, I'm not sure which). So half way thru I bailed. Lost my appetite, I guess. Love, Boloxxxi.

Whoa. I can't believe I actually watched this piece of crap all the way through. I kept watching hoping that at some point it would stop being boring, but it was boring all the way through .... all the way to the end .... which was also boring! I mean really, just because this movie has two scenes of nudity and "blood" does not make it automatically worth watching. This is one of those movies where the "blood" effects are soooo cheesy, you really don't feel scared or disgusted because it just looks so fake. And the two scenes where the heroine "bares her chest" are nothing more than that: The heroine just shows us her breasts while looking at herself in the mirror ..... seriously, the producers could have paid this actress a lot less if they excluded such boring and unnecessary nudity.

Oh yes, and all this movie sets out to do is to show us what a slut the heroine is! I mean, she has sex with no less than 12 guys! (relax, it hardly even qualifies as "softcore porn").

I don't want to spoil the movie for you since I think that would be very unfair, but take my advice: THIS MOVIE IS BORING TIME WASTING GARBAGE! JUST BECAUSE IT'S "UNIQUE" OR "ORIGINAL" IT DOES NOT, I REPEAT, DOES NOT MEAN IT IS WORTH WATCHING! STAAAAAY AWAAAAAAY! Needless to say, anyone who was stupid enough to act in this movie probably doomed their career as an actor ... and rightly so, I've never seen any of the actors in this movie appear anywhere after it! Ha! Although Sarah .... oh heck I don't know the heroine's name .... did a good job acting in this movie, alas, she doomed her career as an actress for acting in such a terrible piece of movie junk.

Remember people, this movie is not worth your time, it's just as bad as Alvin and The Chipmunks 1 & 2: Total CRAP.