Deadly Heroes

Michael Pare and Jan-Michael Vincent star as two commandos who look to fight it out against middle eastern terrorists who have hi-jacked a bus as well as kidnapped Pare's wife in this highly unlikely tale. Someone wrote me to ask what makes a guilty pleasure different from a laughable bomb. I had never thought about it but it had to be that the movie was goofy yet competently made, where as a laughable bomb is just goofy. Deadly Heroes is a laughable bomb because the movie starts with hijackers taking over a bus with plastic guns (I'm serious) I'm not even going to go into what it takes to actually make something penetrate the skin and kill, mainly black powder and the pressure which is highly explosive. Indeed one can't think of worse thing to make out of plastic. The movie actually proceeds to get even dumber as Billy Drago surfaces as a the head honcho villain. Indeed it is weird but it is only Jan-Michael Vincent who seems suited to his part. Where as the rest of the cast (Even the usually respectable Michael Pare) are uniformly bad. Still this is hilarious to watch and somehow this clunker plays on TV every summer for some unfathomable reason.

* out of 4-(Bad)

This is one of those good-guys-on-a-daring-mission-against-impossible-odds movies that offers the expected bursts of violent action just often enough to maintain the interest of its intended audience. Remember when Michael Pare showed promise back in the underrated "Streets of Fire?" He's come down from those days but still makes a suitable hero and is keeping himself in shape. Note how good he looks in the torture scene where he's stripped to his undershorts, tied against a wall, and subjected to punches, kicks, and a few electrical shocks. Titillatingly, some of these shocks are applied directly to his nipples though the contact is just a flash and can't compare to the slow, agonized way in which Steve Durham's nipples were "fried" in "Born American." Pare's undershorts, alas, keep off-limits the more sensitive and vulnerable areas of his male anatomy -- a bit of prudishness which doesn't make much sense when the whole idea is to subject him to the greatest possible pain.

"Deadly Heroes" is a true test of bad movie endurance. Even fans of Billy Drago, Jan-Michael Vincent, or Michael Pare, will be severely tested. Throw in an astonishingly bad performance by the female lead, Claudette Mink, plus a story that brings new meaning to the word contrived, and you might be living with the fast forward button. I actually admired the cab driver's acting, compared to the cardboard acting by the leads. In summary, a totally unbelievable script, bad performances all around, and zero redeeming qualities. This was a movie that I didn't even want to like, because the plastic gun hijacking set in motion one of the most contrived story lines ever put on film. Not recommended, even for admirers of the actors. - MERK

I was flipping channels today and was drawn into this celluloid vortex of unintentional hilarity. It was like a ghastly car wreck, I knew I shouldn't look...but I couldn't help myself. For me, the most hilarious element of the movie was the fact that they couldn't afford professional stunt people, so these poor actors (I use the term "actor" loosely) had to do their own stunts!!! And believe me, when you see Grade D actors doing their own stunts, it's pretty funny to watch. My wife and I were rolling on the ground with laughter at the terribly choreographed fight scenes and special effects. There's one scene where Jan Michael Vincent tries to do a "wheel kick" to take down a terrorist and he literally stumbles and falls onto the guy! And they didn't edit it out! LOL For me, "Deadly Heroes" (even the title is hilarious) has become the contemporary "Plan Nine From Outer Space," in that they take it so seriously...and yet it's such an amateurish train wreck. If you appreciate truly bad dialogue, you'll love this film. Pretty much every third line is an "oucher." I'm going to try and find this film on video and invite some friends over for a hoot of a time. If you're the type that enjoys movies that are so bad they're good, I highly recommend this film. Cheers!

I thought that this movie here, Deadly Heroes was actually a decent movie. The casting was a different assembled one and how many movies does Billy Drago, Jan-Michael Vincent, and Michael Paré star in a film all together? Three unique actors all in one movie! Drago played a great and unusual psycho here in this movie which I think he is a great bad guy actor! Vincent played a good part and Paré was good as usual. Galit Giat who played the female baddie was really good. The action in the movie is good and the film starts off with a bang. It may seem like a different Delta Force movie since Billy Drago plays another and very similar psychotic drug lord but only this time his hair is shorter and a different color. I don't think that this film is bad at all and in fact I was quite interested through out the flick. Give this one a chance especially if you are a fan of the actors I mentioned above because I recommend it!