The Transformers: The Movie

First of all, anyone who has left a negative comment on this movie has something wrong with them, seriously. I have no idea when I first saw this movie but I was about 6-ish. I'm now 22 and this is still a bloody awesome film. I have always been a big Transformers fan and I know I might seem a bit bias, but I own the movie on DVD and have shown it to a number of transformer illiterates, male and female, young and old and still the only people I know who have ever got a bit sick of it are my parents, as they have seen it about as many times as myself. Everything about this movie is excellent, from the new characters, to the fact that the autobots seem to suck at shooting anything ( as opposed to the usual 'bad guys can't shoot for doit'.) even down to what would be, if not for the movie it's in, one of the crappiest songs ever 'the touch', by the Loins I think. THE Battle, Primes death, the creation of Galvatron, the Junkbots, Sharkticons, Unicron, IT IS ALL GOLD!!!! Anyone who liked 80's cartoons should love this movie, and so should all your Kids, if not, I think it's time to go and get checked out by your G.P.

I'm biased. There's no two ways about it. They could have gotten two six years olds to draw the cels, a troop of monkeys to write the dialogue and then printed the film upside down and full of static and I'd still have loved it (if anybody out there says 'Didn't they do that anyway?', I'll thump them.) I am one of a dying but suprisingly populous breed: the Tranformers fan, and to me this film is like the Holy grail.

If you think I'm going to get all gooey and teary-eyed then go into nostalgia overload then forget it because I'm not. I say this with a straight face and a critic's eyes: this is a good film. It may be a two hour toy commercial. It may have made zip at the box offce. It may get bad press from idiotic fossils that just aren't prepared to make the effort to tap into the universe the film is set in. But the fact remains that to anybody that's grown up with Transformers, this film is marvelous. Why? Because it does it right! The characters act right. The style is right. It's all done so perfectly that no right minded Transfan could possibly complain. How many Batman fans (and I mean real Batman fans) can honestly say the same thing about their film franchise.

It's easy to get preachy about the violence in a film aimed at kids. It gives the moral majority something to do other than examine each Disney film for subliminal messages. I found it refreshing to actually see this kind of film refuse to pull its punches. It's an action film without tapping into the over-sentimental gushy stuff that usually turns kids off anyway. This is a war. Death and violence are part of it. Will it effect the children that watch it. Maybe, but I don't know which way. I saw first saw the film when I was 7. I saw all of my favourites get blown apart. I saw my absolute, total, complete and utter hero, the person that personified all that was good and noble to me (you know who I mean) get killed saving his friends in an ultimate display of bravery and courage. I cried. My mum cried. I still do. I think that one moment made me more afraid and ashamed of death and destruction than a dozen Private Ryans.

The animation is top notch, there's an amazing soundtrack and the voice talent is good too. Not perfect, but Nimoy's portrayal of Galvatron is incredible. Espicially when you consider that it was probably done as a 'For the money not the art' job. The script isn't bad either. It has a host of sharp, quotable one-liners that would put Bruce Willis to shame ("I've got better things to do tonight than die.") The story is a rip off of Star Wars but what isn't and who cares? It's cool. The animation is superb. I said that earlier but I really do believe that it's better than Disney at some points. Certainly better than the average output at the time. It doesn't compare with today's graphics but it hasn't aged badly at all. The sountrack can sound a little too cheesy at times but the energy and verve of the film is there and it backs up the visuals with ease.

In the end it won't matter. This film won't mean a thing to anybody that doesn't know who Jazz, Bumblebee and Soundwave were to begin with. They won't watch it. They won't like it. And you know what? We don't care. Those of us that can name all five mebers of the Stunticons know better. They gave us what we wanted. And we remain eternally grateful.

In 2005, years after series 2, the Decepticons rule Cybertron. The Autobots are limited to bases on Cybertron's moons and Autobot City on Earth. Optimus Prime is planning a massive assault on Cybertron, but Megatron has similar ideas, and launches an attack on Autobot City, nearly decimating the entire Autbot force before retreating. Of course, this being a movie, things get complicated: Unicron, the devourer of worlds turns up, and is heading for Cybertron. Now the Autobots have to reclaim a relic from the Decepticons while defending Cybertron from a giant transforming planet that eats other planets.

Simple, no? Couldn't follow that? Stop reading now, this movie is only for fans.

Essentially, this a feature-length toy commercial. The story is cool. After all, its about giant robots that transform into cars. Awesome. The movie just follows these robots along as they spend most of the 84-minutes fighting. All the new characters are introduced by having an established character say to the new character "Hey! (new guy) Blow up that thing!" or, "Hey! (new guy), attack those bad guys!". Awesome. I love movies where fights aren't disrupted by petty things such as plot details or character introductions, it makes things much more fun.

The animation is generally better than it was in the TV series. Add to that an 80s soundtrack, consisting of only 80s pop and hair-metal. Awesome. Of course, not everyone is going to like the soundtrack. In fact, I'm willing the bet that a majority of people would loathe the soundtrack, but that is not important, because the soundtrack is awesome. Plus there are some really cool quotes. Yay.

9/10 - Only for fans (of either Transformers or 80s music)

I thought it was perfect for its time. I recently acquired a VHS and enjoyed the movie all over again. The over rocked song, extra dramatic statements, the whole bit sent chills up my spine when I first saw it in 1986 and again in 2004. The animation wasn't the best, even for then, but that was not important. At the time I was a teenager and I enjoyed every bit of it. Transformers was my favorite cartoon, right after Voltron (the lion one). I liked the new characters, it didn't matter. It was a perfect 80's over sentimental, over rock tracked, bravado of a male ego movie aimed at little boys, even down to the vehicles, Semis, race cars, dump trucks, construction vehicles. Nowadays it wouldn't wash, with the violence and destruction (Unicron) but those were the 80's. Now everything is sanitized.

They should, however do a 2004 or 05 version revisiting OptPrime and MegaT - Imagine Pixar or whoever doing this movie it would look serious. Dinobots forever, (I dislike with a passion that stupid animal transformer series where Optimus Primal has to twist his whole body to transform. He looks rather stupid.

The release of Bay and Spielberg's megablockbuster is the ideal time to look back on "Transformers: the movie", the original (and animated) big-screen adventure of the famous toy. This feature was commissioned to revamp the product, and kill off many of the original characters in order to introduce new ones. It sees the Autobot/Decepticon war take a backseat to a global war of survival against planet eater Unicorn (voiced by Orson Welles).

Surprisingly enough, there is a lot worth mentioning in this film, both good and bad.

On the minus side, of course, the predominantly 80s soundtrack has aged quite horrendously and some new characters are less appealing than they should be, chiefly the dinobots whose "comic relief" is neither comical nor relieving. The ending also feels rushed, which is a shame since such a fast-paced and action-packed film as this could have used a calmer denouement.

On the plus side, though you can fault the film's purely commercial objective, you can only admire its inventiveness. Unicorn is a beauty, both in design and in how the creature is used. The opening planet destroying scene is abrupt, savage and hugely impressive, even 20 years later. Optimus Prime is used to maximum effect, as is the whole Megatron/Galvatron storyline. The fast pacing and varied locals are the real strength though, since our heroes run from planet to planet and bump into intriguing (and often disturbing) creations, such as the genocidal Quintessons. The film's laudable level of violence is probably a key component of its enduring appeal.

All in all, one can only hope that at least a few of the many neat ideas explored here will find their way into the sequel to 2007's live action version.

This may not be Shakespeare, but to an extent, it is worthy of its minor cult following. A more than adequate 85 minutes with touches of bizarre genius.