Commando

The retired Special Forces Colonel John Matrix (Arnold Schwarzenegger) lives a calm life with his beloved daughter Jenny (Alyssa Milano) in an isolated house in the woods of a mountain. One day, his mentor Major General Franklin Kirby (James Olson) visits him and tells that the men he had trained for his unit are being killed and he leaves two soldiers to protect Matrix. However the helicopter of General Kirby has been followed by hit men that abduct Jenny and Matrix. Soon Matrix learns that Bennett (Vernon Wells) that belonged to his unit and was presumed dead is the responsible for attack to his house. Further, Bennett was hired by Arius (Dan Hedaya), a former president of a South American country that Matrix had overthrown. Now Arius wants Matrix to assassinate the president of his country in order to assume the position again otherwise he will kill Jenny. Matrix is forced to embark in a flight to the country with one of Bennett's thug while another one, Sully (David Patrick Kelly), will confirm that Matrix is in the flight. However Matrix manages to kill the thug and leave the plane and has eleven hours to save Jenny. He convinces the flight attendant Cindy (Rae Dawn Chong) to help him to save his daughter.

"Commando" is another great action movie from the 80's, maybe the best decade in the cinema history for this genre. The screenplay has non-stop action and funny and unforgettable moments. My favorite is when John Matrix tells to Sully that he likes him and he will be the last one to die. Soon he corrects, saying "I lied". I did not recognized Alyssa Milano, from "Charmed", in her second role as Jenny. My vote is seven.

Title (Brazil): "Comando Para Matar" ("Commando to Kill")

Rating: *** 1/2 out of ****

Every time I'm accused by friends of being too tough or too picky on action movies made for pure entertainment (i.e. the works of Jerry Bruckheimer), I point back and tell them to look no further than Mark L. Lester's Commando as the prime example of a pure macho classic and the standard by which all mindless action cinema should be judged.

In its own simplistic ways, Commando is actually the epitome of Arnold Schwarzenegger. Whenever we think of the Austrian muscle-bound star's films; gun battles, fist fights, deadpan one-liners, a total lack of plot, and a ridiculously high body count come to mind. Commando represents all this, directed with high energy flair and a great sense of fun.

Schwarzenegger stars as John Matrix, a former commando who lives in the mountains with his young daughter (Alyssa Milano). Matrix's former teammates are being knocked off one-by-one at the orders of a Latino dictator (Dan Hedaya) who wants Matrix to assassinate a popular South American leader so that he can be instilled back in power. As incentive, Matrix's daughter is kidnapped by renegade military, led by Bennett (Vernon Wells), who was once part of Matrix's team. As soon as Matrix boards his flight, he kills his escort, leaps off the plane, and begins his eleven-hour search for his daughter. Inexplicably joining his search is a flight attendant (Rae Dawn Chong) who gets mixed up in this whole mess.

Commando is one of those critically berated movies that only concerns itself with giving its target audience a good time. Running at a lightning fast ninety minutes, the film is packed to the gunnels with explosive action sequences and quotable one-liners. In fact, the lines are so fun, I have a hard time choosing my favorites. Here are a few examples: "I eat green berets for breakfast and I'm very hungry,""Remember when I said I'd kill you last? I lied," and "Let off some steam, Bennett!"

The script is mindless and idiotic, but serves its purpose by providing just enough plot and enormously entertaining one-liners to keep the momentum from ebbing. There are also plenty of noticeable continuity errors (ask yourself how a guy standing behind a railing atop a balcony could be hit with shotgun pellets without the railing taking the slightest bit of damage!), but that just adds to the movie's list of unique charms.

But you don't watch Commando for plot or technical brilliance, you watch it to see Arnold acting as a one-man army, mowing down scores of enemy thugs and soldiers. Whether it's through the movie's various shootouts, fistfights, or chases, the movie delivers thrilling action one scene after another. The climactic battle sequence, in which he single-handedly takes on at least a hundred men, will either make or break the film for you. Me, I had a blast watching Arnold inflict his brand of justice upon these nasty villains. Unless you don't like Arnold or over-the-top action films, it's unlikely you'll find Commando boring.

Schwarzenegger's charismatic and hugely likable screen presence is undeniable, and his delivery of those classic one-liners is perfect. Luckily, the movie has an equally strong villain in Vernon Wells, who delights in chewing the scenery and generally acting as insane as possible in any given situation. From his manic facial expressions to his questionable tastes in clothing, Wells makes Bennett one of the few villains that really stand out in an Arnold flick. You know the movie's going to boil down to a one-on-one fight between the two, and it's one of those fight scenes where each one takes his turn beating the crud out of the other without one ever truly having the upper hand until the very end (when, obviously, one of them's got to be dead).

For pure mindless mayhem, Commando is a perfect choice for Saturday night entertainment. I first saw the film on its network broadcast premiere, and distinctly remember that in the scene where Arnold hides in the garden house (which is the film's goriest part), the movie is edited in such a way that it appears only one man approaches the house instead of six!

Arnold Schwarzenegger is the embodiment of 80s-90s muscle-man action cinema, an era we can now look back on with nostalgia, mostly for its unabashed mixture of macho ultra violence and out-of-control kitsch. It's interesting to note that the Austrian Titan's first great commercial disappointment - Last Action Hero - was a parody of the genre he dominated. How do you parody parody itself? The man's best films, the first two Terminator films and Predator, rise above that, but most of his work is inches from being one big spoof.

While you can't parody the genre outright, you can take it to its extreme, and I'm not sure what Commando is or who it was meant for, but that's what it does. Schwarzenegger's John Matrix (a typical Austrian name, that) lives a life of mono parental bliss with daughter Jennie (or, as he calls Alyssa Milano, "Tchainee") until she is kidnapped and he is forced to throw all his retired killing machine skills into saving her.

We can run through the ingredients, it's actually worth it for once: - Body fascination. The film never hesitates to glory on Schwarzenegger's body, and while he isn't showing off with impossible feats (carrying a tree or busy phone booth) he just sits there, bare-chested, for the camera. - Homo-erotic subtext. If it's that in-your-face, it can't really be subtext. Beside the fact that this is probably an affront to gays everywhere, the tension between Ahnuld and main villain Bennett would be interesting if it weren't for... well... Bennett himself. I'd describe the world's most ill-conceived blockbuster villain for you, but I'd rather not ruin the surprise. Just youtube "Last Fight Scene - Matrix vs Bennett". - Gratuitous violence. Not much blood here, but every bullet that grazes the floor creates its own explosion. And the stunt-work reaches miraculous levels of retardation. - "Clever" One-liners. If that's your thing, you're in for a real treat. - Outrageous music: oh boy, you can't imagine... - Sexy but severely underused damsel in distress. Underused? We wish. Sexy, not quite.

It's hard to even rate this film. It makes for a delirious group viewing experience, but then again, nobody could ever honestly call it a good a film. And unlike True Lies, another very silly film, this hasn't aged gracefully at all, hence much of its "charm" is down to nostalgia. It's the only way to forgive the film's confounding technical ineptitude (the number of goofs and continuity disasters sets a record).

You have to see it to believe it. Then again, maybe not. Just check out the wildest bits and watch Predator instead.

Thank you YouTube!

Solidly entertaining, over the top, comic book style spectacle giving superstar Arnold Schwarzenegger the perfect opportunity to play action hero with more levity than usual. Screenwriter Steven E. de Souza injects lots of wit and memorable one liners into the mix while director Mark L. Lester serves up the assorted action scenes with great relish. Granted, it's absolutely pure nonsense, but irresistible on that level.

Arnold plays John Matrix, retired soldier who's forced back into action when a vengeance minded former dictator (Dan Hedaya) wants him to murder a sitting president and kidnaps Matrix's daughter Jenny (Alyssa Milano) in order to make him do it. Fortunately, Matrix manages to slip away from the bad guys, and acquires some unlikely help in the form of feisty stewardess Cindy (Rae Dawn Chong), while the clock is ticking the entire time.

"Commando" is appreciably unpretentious stuff that knows what it has to do and does it in style. We get to see Arnold, among other things, rip a phone booth out of a wall, dangle a man over the edge of a cliff with one hand, swing from the roof of a mall using balloons, tear a seat out of a car, eat a Green Beret for breakfast (he's VERY hungry, don't you know?), go on an early morning shopping trip at the local surplus store, lug an enormous log around, get a face full of ice cream, drop from a plane into a swamp, and feed a deer. Now, who can read that and pass this up? "Commando" is tons of fun provided the prospective viewer is ready to suspend every bit of their disbelief. The movie just rockets forward with no filler to slow it down, taking place within a limited amount of time, and keeping up an amazing energy level.

Arnold, for the first time here, got to show that he did indeed have a sense of humour about what he did, and is very easy to watch, with a great supporting cast - also including Vernon Wells, as one of the most priceless villains to ever grace the action genre, James Olson, David Patrick Kelly, and Bill Duke, with bit appearances by the likes of Bob Minor, Chelsea Field, Branscombe Richmond, and Bill Paxton. James Horner's music score is awfully familiar, but it does help drive the movie forward, and there are some beautiful moments of extreme violence - including scalping by saw blade and an arm chopped off - to give the presentation some real punch.

Check your brain at the door and you can have a really good time with this one, or in other words, let off some steam.

Eight out of 10.

It was like yesterday (well, sort of!) when I watched "Commando" at a movie theater! And that was 3 decades ago. I checked it again today because of some reason and I am amazed because of how less silly it looks to me now.

It's a classic. No doubt about that. And it's pure fun. Violent-ish of course but with great tongue-in-cheek humor delivered by one of the most charismatic actors ever.

If you have missed it before go watch it (with a pinch of salt

of course)! A fun way to pass one hour and a half!

• Remember when I promised to kill you last?

• I lied!