PhilosophicZombi

Cazadores de Espías, or "Spy Hunters" (as near as I can translate), is a sight to behold. I was initially fooled into believing that this was a lucha libre film, but be forewarned it is something else entirely. Instead I was greeted with a 70's spy flick involving evil overlords, mad scientists, mysterious vixens, robots, a luchadore, deadly man strangling plants and go-go dancers, with a musical number or two thrown in for good measure. Sadly, my Spanish is rusty, and with no dubbing or subtitles, this was a rough sit through. This film cannot be taken seriously, so just sit back and enjoy the ride, with the knowledge that you'll never see anything like this again.

I'm a movie buff. I've seen thousands of films, ranging from superb to utter trash, but "The Carrier" was.... umm... something else entirely. I was making my way through an outdoor market, when I came upon a booth filled with VHS tapes from a recently closed Rental store. I found a bundle of gems, z-grade horror movies that even in the depth of my searches had never seen or even heard about. Innitially, "The Carrier" seemed the most tame of the bunch, but I was quite wrong. I expected a cheesy 80's creature feature, but instead, I got a religious, political, medical thriller with the most bizarre imagery, acting, and storyline I think I have ever been witness to. The story is basically about a despised social outcast, who is attacked by a monster/mutant/alien/metaphor/ thing(?) who passes on a deadly disease. The box informed me of that much. What it failed to mention is that the entire film is a surrealist nightmare. It's like watching a twisted medical epidemic version of Leave it to Beaver, but with violent gangs wrapped in plastic, disturbed fundamentalist religious cults and 1950's social satire. I watched the first half trying in vain to figure out what was going on and the second half wondering how on earth this thing could end. The film was not bad, it never reached a state of being boring, but it was so confusing. Part of me would really like to hear a director's commentary on this movie, maybe they would be able to explain all the metaphors and allegories that no doubt existed but just didn't shine through all of the madness. When the credits rolled, i was literally left speechless and I had to take a nap. Yes... thats the kind of movie this was. I don't know who i should recommend this to, horror fans will be left dumbfounded, Indy film lovers will lash out at the effects and muddled ideas throughout. If you get the opportunity to watch this, I would suggest a trial run. You'll be left with a head full of questions but you will be thought provoked.

Let me run an idea past you. In a film, a greenhorn soldier has emotional realizations about the ugly truth of war, while confronting the demons of his own beliefs and self doubt. Sounds pretty good right! Of course. That's because "Apocalypse Now", "Full Metal Jacket", "Platoon".... they already covered this folks. Thus when watching Jarhead, you will likely have your own flashbacks. Jake Gyllenhaal and Jamie Foxx... remind anyone else of Charlie Sheen and Keith David? Repetitive qualities aside, I've grown to despise war movies, and not just the crap like "Pearl Harbor". From the 1940's to the 1960's the only movies made regarding war were propaganda films where the military was always virtuous and noble. Then came the mid 60's and every film made lashed out at the government, writing the military off as a group of war mongers. The real military, like everything else in life isn't black and white, its a hundred thousand shades of gray. If ever there was a film accurately portraying the military, it would probably be quite dull. Unfortunately, movies pointing out the military's flaws seem to draw in cash, so they keep getting made. "Lucky" for me, I got a free screening. I've wasted two hours... spare yourselves the time and money. Check out the Wallace and Gromit movie, you might hate it, but at least you'll avoid the deja vu.