Carl_Tait

"Metalhead" starts with a good idea. Like so many "Black Mirror" episodes, it takes a technology that has an analogue in today's world - robot guard dogs - and then imagines some horrible consequences of that technology. But here's the problem: instead of the interesting, provocative issues that might be discussed (think about the unforgettable "Hated in the Nation"), the whole story is just a prolonged chase scene. It's reminiscent of Spielberg's celebrated TV movie of Richard Matheson's "Duel." But while "Duel" generates real tension with its sympathetic protagonist, "Metalhead" is a boring failure. It's only 41 minutes but feels way too long.

That said, the episode is not a disaster. The black-and-white cinematography is effective, and there are a few moments of suspense and cleverness in the struggle. But it's one of the weakest episodes of the generally excellent "Black Mirror."

"Hey! Let's make a movie about an oppressive government torturing one of its citizens for no real reason. That's pretty awful stuff, and we know it happens in the real world. The plot? Oh, who cares; it's the MESSAGE that counts. We must all fight for the freedom to think and write what we please!"

Those could have been the thoughts running through the mind of the filmmaker who created "Closet Land." The result is a desperately earnest but thin and tedious film. The hero's allegedly subversive children's story is of NO INTEREST WHATSOEVER, which makes the endless analysis and retelling insufferably dull. "But that's the point! She didn't write anything subversive, but those totalitarian monsters insisted on READING it that way!" Well, duh; who cares? Boring is boring.

It has been noted that "The Pillowman" by Martin McDonagh may have been inspired by the central notion of this film: an author being interrogated by a totalitarian officer for writing questionable stories. I almost hope it's true, as I can imagine McDonagh's irritation in slogging through this film: "What terrible, dreary handling of an interesting idea!" McDonagh's play fixes the two biggest defects of "Closet Land." First, his author writes *interesting* stories, and lots of them. They are genuinely subversive: creepy and twisted tales that inspire uncomfortable nervous laughter. Second, McDonagh handles the interrogator with black humor worthy of Kafka. The off-center levity heightens the surrealism and the tension.

So see "Closet Land" if you feel obligated to perform a chore in support of a worthy cause. See or read "The Pillowman" if you actually want to see something good.