Tolka

If you came into this film wanting a gripping story, insightful information, or any plot line at all - you'll be disappointed. But if you love gorgeous terrain, over-cranked shots of mountain biking, and a driven sound track, this is the film for you.

I caught a screening of this outdoors on an HD projector - likely how it was meant to be seen. I noticed that the film was sponsored by bike company Shimano. This was a telling title card that should have warned me of the content to follow. A narrator poetically draws a metaphor about the river of life and the birth, growth, maturation, and death of a bicycle... but it's a strain to have any emotional connection to a spinning hunk of metal. The blooper reel for this movie must be to die far - literally.

Imagine a 47 minute commercial for a lifestyle obsession and you have this film. It's beautiful bike porn.

'Adapation.' The opening was brilliant and the first hour/hour-and-a-half was equally immersive. While I sat through the film, I was becoming increasingly convinced that I was going to own it someday. Being a screenwriter myself, I felt the SCRIPT was speaking to me directly and compelling ME to write BETTER scripts.

Then the film sold out. It knew it would sell out, it was aware that it would sell out, and it probably planned on selling out from the moment Kaufman began writing "Kaufman's" inner monologue. Man, this has to be a work of post-post-post modernism--a world in which *everything has been done* and scripts ABOUT how *everything has been done* have (ALSO) already *been done.*

In 'Adaptation,' we witness a film collapsing on itself. Just like '12 Monkeys' but with scathing self-awareness. Just like 'Get Shorty' but without cheer or a smug wittiness. With 'Adaptation,' we understand that there might be a film out there about orchids somewhere, but it's not this one. This one is about selling out.

I say 'selling out' because we have a film that does so only because the characters all do so. Donald sells out to Robert McKee's screenwriter "principles," Laroche sells out one thing at a time (fish, flowers, porn), Orlean realizes she has nothing worth selling at all, and Charlie sells out by writing the most pandering, backdoor finish to his movie as we witness it.

Lately I've really found myself enjoying films where nobody dies, nobody falls in love, and nothing too darn exciting happens at all. Charlie Kaufman probably likes those films, too--but realizes that "Charlie Kaufman" can't possibly write one of them. That's too bad, because his/"his" film started out so incredibly well.