Saturday Morning Massacre

The single greatest missed opportunity in the history of man. What should have been a groovy five star romp, turned out to be nothing more than a half-baked wannabe Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Saturday Morning Mystery is brainless, practically bloodless, and without a sense of humor...or horror for that matter. The film, if you can even call it that, is sure to disappoint every fan of every genre as it brings literally nothing to the table. Turning Scooby Doo into a horror film is the single most brilliant idea I never had. This is why I am so angry at the filmmakers responsible for this blunder, because it deserved better. I could have wiped my butt with film stock and produced a better final product than this trash.

Other reviewers claimed that a missed opportunity to create a real life Scooby-Doo movie was missed. No it was not. There were already two made and that is more then enough. One reviewers contends it is not a copy of Scooby-Doo, Yes it is. For all intents and purposes, it is. The ONLY reason I would suspect The Evil Dead is mentioned is due to the amount of blood? Of course the blurb on the cover is a no name site and unknown person so why believe what is claimed? One could make a much better comparison. Yeah, they have a dog, so what?

The objective breakdown:

Cinematography: Less then average. Much of the film is shot in darkness. Camera seemed to have a great deal of difficulty in focusing. You will see many a shot not in focus. Shots are not properly framed. This occurs so frequently it is disturbing.

Sound: Average. Sound is clear and no difficulty discerning dialogue.

Music: Background music does not seem to fit the movie and is repetitious, loud and ingratiating after viewing for a period of time

Acting: Some are average. The actor playing the "Shaggy" character is horrid. The cop is not much better. It is amazing how much work some of these actors have in low, low budget er... movies, should I call them that?

Script: Predictable. This is suppose to be a parody. It is extremely obvious that the two writers attempted quite a bit of humor in the dialogue. The problem is, none of it is funny at all. The inability to write humor and the actors inability to deliver the lines properly is as painful as performing botched eye surgery upon one's self with a spatula. It fail completely what it sets out to do.

If one has absolutely nothing else to watch I guess one could watch this. There are SO many bad movies made it is like being hit by a tsunami. Regurgitation of the same film over and over makes me want to regurgitate.

"Saturday Morning Mystery" (formerly known as Saturday Morning Massacre- and Massacre is still the film's true form.) is a bizarre little indie flick directed by Spencer Parsons. The film stars Ashley Rae Spillers, Johnny Mars, Josephine Decker, Adam Tate and Paul Gordon. The story follows a crack pot team of paranormal investigators, much like the Scooby gang, who get hired to dispel the rumors and fears of locals around the paranormal activity at an estate. The group soon learn that there are much more sinister things hidden behind the walls of the Kyser schoolhouse. The gang choose to stay and solve the creepy behind the going-ons at the property, which proves to be in grave error. The decision to solve this mystery becomes a real massacre.

"Saturday Morning Mystery", (or Massacre) as I prefer to consider the film, is truly one of those strange films that blows you away. I had expected some cheesy, retro-throttled, low-budget spectacle. At the start there is a real throwback feel to the film which clearly became inspired by the cartoon mystery gang- only with the characters and their back-story though. Beyond that the similarities become terrifyingly obsolete. This is a real fright-fest fanfare story, with a way more sinister series of events than any cartoon show could think of inspiring. It becomes a truly gripping and nail-biting grindhouse horror story. The kitschy beginning and groovy build-up in this film has a cleverly darker intent. That intent is to throw you off guard, and then drag you into the pits of hellish nightmares as your nails tear off, and blood stained cries shatter the dark chilling air! This film is one of those rides into horror land that you will be glad you took. Think –The Scooby gangs accidentally wonder into the path of Stag Night kinfolk in a rural setting.

The story in this film is pretty well written and flows beautifully. There are a couple of moments that go off between dialog and scene portrayal. Actually only two that I remember seeming off was the "tab of acid" line and the "I totally have a jimmy in this bag" (or something like that.) There was no tabs taken-the drug leeched into the water cooler, and the character that said the line about the jimmy didn't have a bag on her in the scene. At least I didn't see one. Anyway those two moments – that is all-those two were the only milliseconds that slowed my totally pleasurable horror ride into this window to Hell. Pretty much every aspect of the film from cinematography to directed to soundtrack and kill scenes rocked in "Saturday Morning Mystery" You don't expect the intense vicious turn this film takes toward the last act but man it drags you in and sets you on the edge of the slaughtering blade of horror. This is truly one of the best indie horror films I have seen and a must for horror movie collectors.

Firstly I'd like to say that I really hate it when the posters and covevart to a film is misleading it in some cases features characters that aren't fen in the film ........like the chainsaw!?? Supposedly this is a comedy horror? But I can't remember anything remotely funny. Shame as the idea of a gory parody of Scooby Doo is a good one but was totally wasted on this very lazy script.

The acting isn't too bad but it just plods along at snail pace with usual cliches and the fun only really starts in the last 25mins, from then it's ok. Some ok gore and hint of tension. Ultimately it's a huge wasted opportunity due to the poor writing. Only watch if not much else on.

I want to make some things clear to anyone considering watching this movie. Saturday Morning Mystery is not a parody, it's not very funny and generally isn't trying to be, and it has next to nothing to do with Scooby Doo.

This is just another low budget horror flick, very low budget, about a Ghost Hunters style scenario going bad when a crew of paranormal debunkers loaded down with video equipment stumble across an actual scary situation. This is a great premise that no one can seem to get right (the original Grave Encounters came closest) and Saturday Morning Mystery is certainly no exception.

Our crew of cash strapped debunkers are sent to a notorious house reputedly once owned by Satanist and now allegedly haunted by... something.

The dysfunctional group includes a druggie, an uptight rich guy, a smart girl that acts as leader, and her best friend. Oh, and a dog, which has nothing to do with the plot and never does anything significant (Scooby Doo he ain't). That dog, along with references in the beginning to criminals using ghost stories to hide their crimes, are the only references to Scooby Doo and there is almost no outright comedy, intentional or unintentional.

The first hour is plodding and dull and the movie stays alive, just barely, by the strength of the cast, which is above average for this type of movie. They're not playing well written characters though and the script seems so choppy and poorly structured that the film never flows well.

All hell breaks loose in the last 30 minutes but I wouldn't really say that it qualifies as a slow burn because the finale is so incongruous with the rest of the movie that it really feels like part of a different film.

An out of nowhere sex scene in the middle of the movie and a hilarious car fire filmed by people that clearly didn't have the money or resources to actually light a car on fire are pretty much the only memorable things about this POS. Just skip it.