The Amityville Asylum

Low-budget, claustrophobic (shot indoors and confined spaces), chat-fest about a young woman who gets a cleaning job at a mental institution where she contends with intimidating and creepy staff (one guy, actually), seeing people that aren't there, and "ward X" for the criminally insane who talk to her while she's down there cleaning the hallway.

The premise of this would-be or can't-be horror movie is that the asylum is built on the same spot as the famous Amityville house of the 70's (ergo the title of the movie) and before that, earlier on in the 18th century, where witchcraft practicing native-Americans were murdered by Christians.

I did not have high hopes (ha, ha) going into this thing, but it struck me in the early go that the acting was actually quite good and the performers serious and convincing. So that kind of hooked me, got my hopes up a bit (ha, ha, again). About mid-way, after seeing a poorly executed mirror scene (a tradition in many horror movies) that was supposed to spook me, my hopes suddenly plummeted. I had found the weakness of this movie: The scenes that were supposed to scare you, horrify you, and gross you out (what little there was) were very amateurish and lame (weak). Reader, you're better off if you grab a chair, go to a window of your house and look out. I assure you that whatever you see will be as interesting as this movie. So why bother? Love, Boloxxxi.

As I am currently on a trek trying to find some decent horror/thrillers I have been scouring the web high and low for movies that fit into that genre and after a quick read of the synopsis of this I thought I would give it a try. I actually lasted 47 minutes, after wanting to turn it off after 8 minutes then again at the 14, 23 and 31 minute marks I could not harm my television or my eyes anymore as to be brutally honest this is just plain bad. I have shown a lot of patience in my quest to find some decent horror movies but I could not bring myself to watch anymore as the acting was atrocious although I did learn more about cleaning products than what the actual movie was supposed to be about so I guess that is a plus. So my recommendation?? don't even consider watching this as the 1/10 I gave it is more than I wanted to give it.

After a seemingly never ending string of poor Amityville films the Brits step up to the plate and make one of their own.

This time set in a world where the infamous Amityville house has been demolished and upon the ground an asylum has been built instead (Which immediately makes no sense) A girl takes a job as a cleaner and witnesses strange things happening and questions both her own sanity and the motivations of those around her.

To be fair if you can get past how ridiculous the concept is it's not entirely terrible, sadly the film is.

The plot makes very little sense if any at all, the competence of the film makers is clearly there but not the extent where they could turn this around.

Poorly written and hardly an Amityville feature.

The Good:

Looks okay

The Bad:

Very dull

Plot is baffling

Concept is daft

Things I Learnt From This Movie:

Christians getting tattoo's still makes me laugh

Nobody bothered telling the cast they were pronouncing Amityville wrong

Was drawn into seeing 'The Amityville Asylum', with a cool poster/cover, a truly great premise and as someone with a general appreciation for the genre it fits under. That it was low-budget, which from frequent personal experience is rarely a good sign due to that there are so many poor ones out there (though there are decent to good ones as well), made me though apprehensive.

It is sadly however yet another film seen recently, hence some reiteration because the exact same strengths and flaws present in those films are here, that to me was incredibly disappointing considering its potential which it doesn't do anywhere near enough with. 'The Amityville Asylum' is really very bad, with so many huge flaws and doesn't do anything with any potential it had. There is net to nothing good here in 'The Amityville Asylum', just amateur hour all round. The idea was great and the camera work is decent with some atmosphere, but the good things end there.

Going on to the negatives, the story does feel over-stretched and some of it comes over as vague and under-explained in the last third where the film especially became duller, more predictable, more senseless and less unsettled and never gaining momentum. All the characters are too sketchy and with cardboard thin and colourless personalities and with nowhere near enough to make one want to endear to them. Their annoying and illogical decision making and behaviours frustrates. The chemistry is bland and unfocused.

The sound quality is obvious and utilised cheaply (being too loud in the build ups and people's reactions), the effects are shoddy and nearly all of the acting is lacking severely on the whole, that's actually an understatement as the worst of it is horrendous. There is no sense of horror or engagement with the awful predicament they're in, and no connecting with the character, it just reeks of indifference and complete blankness which makes the viewer not care less too.

Dialogue can be stilted and rambling while the pace and film drags on forever, apparent from the very start, never recovering that interest is lost fast. The ending has no build-up and just ends ridiculously. Found too many of the supposedly shocking moments not surprising or scary and the atmosphere dreary, due to the excessive obviousness, a lot of dumb and vague moments and explanations and the lack of tension and suspense. Thrills are none, thanks to stodginess and excessive over-familiarity, and found myself never invested in the drama, which tended to be indifferently acted, interminably paced and statically directed.

A lot of 'The Amityville Asylum' has really dull and going nowhere plot elements and often nonsensical and confusing character motivations, while too many of the things to make you shocked are far from creative or unsettling. It all feels rather tame while the threat completely lacks menace and looks terrible.

Nothing freaky or interesting, no development and too derivative, while everything is unimaginative and are more odd than scary, completely failing to show any sense of dread. There is nothing interesting or illuminating with what the film was trying to do and the drama is overwrought with no momentum and a lot of weirdness. The direction is barely there and disorganised and the music is ill-fitting. 'The Amityville Asylum' is very amateurish visually, too drearily lit and shoddily designed effects-wise.

Overall, very bad. 2/10 Bethany Cox

The DVD slipcase artwork is probably the best thing about this film. This film is so bad I'd rather watch the newest incarnation of Ghostbusters and that was an absolute pile of turd that robbed me of 2 hours of my life.