Keith Lemon: The Film

Never before have I contemplated walking out of the cinema during a film, but during this one myself and the other 6 people I was with were very close to it. We didn't really know what to expect from it, but judging by previous reviews and looking at its 2.9/10 average rating, we should've lowered these expectations even further. The fact the screen was pretty empty should've also given us a clue, but unfortunately we'd already bought the tickets by then.

To all the people that have said "oh but this is what he's all about" or "that's his kind of humour", no. He's capable of much more than what he shows in this terrible, terrible 85 minutes. I read another review that said there was an age divide in the humour - our group spanned an age range of 16 to 45 and not one of us found it funny. It was just painful to watch, really. He was trying much too hard to build on his already beloved character and just made himself look really quite silly.

The only thing I'm pleased about with this film is that my local cinema only charges £2.50 a ticket, so it's not as if I had to break the bank to waste an hour and a half of my life... Would not recommend this film at all to anyone!!

I went into this film with high hopes, and left with the thought in my disappointed mind that I'd never get that hour and a half back.

I'm a big fan of Leigh Francis (Keith Lemon) in everything else he does, for example 'Celebrity Juice' and 'Lemon La Vida Loca' so I was extremely surprised at how poor this feature actually was.

The plot was simply awful making little to no sense, and I usually find myself when watching 'Celebrity Juice' in an absolute trance of laughter but I must say I only slightly giggled maybe five times tops throughout this film. It's almost as if this film was made just for the sake of it, with the thought in Francis' mind that Lemon is so popular and successful he may as well try and get a feature film out of it while it lasts, that's exactly what it felt like for me.

As much as I love Keith Lemon, I think that this film was just a step too far. 'Celebrity Juice'- Hilarious. 'Lemon La Vida Loca'- Possibly too much but still fairly humorous. 'Keith Lemon: The Film- Just too much from the character that I now see as incredibly predictable.

If you want to stay a fan of Keith, DON'T WATCH THIS FILM. It may ruin your appetite for him. However if you have never seen anything with him before, see what you think. But if (understandably) you didn't like it, let me tell you. HIS OTHER SHOWS ARE SIGNIFICANTLY BETTER THAN THIS POOR EXCUSE FOR A FILM.

I left this movie gob-smacked! Who paid for it to be made ? Having wasted so much money would they refund my ticket price, please !! The opening titles indicated it was a British film. A British comedy, they can be really 'humourous'. This film totally failed to humour us. The laughter was from incredulity. The characters failed to develop, in fact decompose would be a better verb to describe what happened. The plot was so thin one would be able to operate a touch screen through it. The scenes that should have been funny were so repetitive they were painfully awful. I believe the audience who might find this film amusing are, thankfully, too young to see it. I am still reeling and unable to believe the amount of resources that have been sunk into this quagmire in order for it to go on general release. I cringed to even give it one star, 0 out of 10 would be a more accurate vote.

I went to see this film because I was fascinated.

I don't think I had ever seen such appalling reviews anywhere before. Every now and again you get a 0% score on rotten tomatoes but even then it's rare for everyone to actively hate a film in the way that people have hated this one.

Like a lot of people on here, I am a massive fan of Celebrity Juice and I just couldn't imagine that it could be that awful. Was there some kind of conspiracy? The answer is no. There's no conspiracy. It really is that bad. It's so bad that watching it gave me the kind of red neck that you get when something appallingly embarrassing is happening but there's nothing you can do about it. I couldn't look at the other patrons in the eye on the way out. It was like we'd all just watched sex with a domestic animal and now felt unbelievably ashamed. I don't know why I didn't walk out really - except that I wanted to say I had seen it, perhaps because I wanted to be able to review it fairly...

So anyway, it's bad film. I can try and write synonyms for bad but I think that others have probably done that better than I could here.

The reason I have created this profile to write this review is because I think there's something a little odd here on IMDb. Has anyone noticed the 10 star review by smr1-466-127649? 10 stars? No one could possibly give that film 10 stars. Not even a 12 year old who might well laugh at some of the more puerile stuff could possibly give it 10 stars.

Clicking on smr1-466-127649's profile we see that he has reviewed 2 films, both in the last 2 days, both hilarious revisions of two of the worst movies in the last 5 years. He gives Last Airbender 7 stars (OK he's not someone who gives awful movies 10 stars for the sake of it) and then goes on a rant about Keith Lemon and how much he's being victimised by people.

Surely the only person who can feel like this is someone associated with the production of the movie. On a day when E J Ellory is outed as having written reviews of his books on Amazon I do hope we're not seeing something similar here on IMDb.

Perhaps the most weird thing about this whole affair has been Leigh Francis's own reaction to the reaction. Scanning through a couple of episodes of CJ, it's clear that he thinks the film is really something. On his twitter account, he describes going to the premier (and actually watching that tripe with other human beings)as being "like a dream". (Fans of In Bruges will find this very funny.)More worryingly, he seems to demonstrate the kind of misogyny that his character Keith Lemon uses (presumably ironically) with his friends Wiloughby and Cotton on normal members of the viewing public - calling one girl who doesn't like him a "horse". Not cool. In addition to that, he goes into a kind of twitter strop, flouncing away for four days before coming back and abusing others who say that his film is awful.

I hope we're not seeing someone have a small breakdown over the critical reaction to his work. If so he needs to get a grip and accept that what he has produced is excrement. It's nasty, homophobic, small minded and if he thinks that Keith Lemon is the remotest bit sympathetic he needs to have a good think about his values in life. This is a terrible film and perhaps he would do well to acknowledge it somehow.

Wow...

This is the worst movie I've ever seen!!!

I'm a big fan of Keith Lemon and went to watch this film with an open mind but could not believe how shocking everything was.

The acting was cringe worthy throughout, storyline was even worst, it was like a cheap version of Austin powers with a script an 8 year old had put together at school.

We was going to leave cinema 20 minutes into the movie but thought things "might" improve, but unfortunately we were very wrong, the outtakes at the end of movie were better than the actual movie.

Be warned!!!!!!