Chastity Bites

The opening scene immediately imparts the tone of the film, pointedly satirizing conservative sociopolitical values and jarring the viewer with a spray of blood. While the high school setting of the feature lends it a certain awkward air some viewers may not take a liking to, 'Chastity bites' is consistently smart and entertaining on its level.

The film is less of a bloody romp than it is a snappy mystery laden with teenage drama, but it's aptly fun and engaging. The fast pace of the narrative flow can be waved off with consideration that it's clearly geared toward a young audience, a bent echoed in the soundtrack and dialogue. Despite that youthful glow, solid film-making should mark the movie enjoyable for most.

The cast, above all, is really great. Allison Scagliotti is sharp and endearing as protagonist Leah, a forward-thinking leftist student journalist who alone is deeply skeptical of the activities at her school. Young Scagliotti has proven herself time and again in roles comedic, action-oriented, and dynamic, and she portrays Leah's determination and wit with the practiced skill of a great talent. Prominent opposite her starring role is Louise Griffiths as antagonist Liz Batho, bearing a cold, dark, but entrancing poise befitting such a calculating (fictionalized) historical figure. Yet the supporting cast, in considerably smaller roles, are just as swell, including Francia Raisa as Leah's best friend Katharine, and Eddy Rioseco as love interest Paul. Even Diana Chiritescu, given few speaking lines as Batho's servant Ilona, is pretty outstanding, and Amy Okuda brings the same spark of derisive smarm to high school queen bee Ashley, here, as she gave Tinkerballa in Felicia Day's ground-breaking web series, 'The guild.'

Costume design, wardrobe, hair and makeup, filming locations, set design and decoration, and art direction are far greater than we would usually expect from a film of this tenor. Even for as little as fight choreography plays into the production, it's highly enjoyable; likewise for special effects. Somewhat stereotypical as the soundtrack is for a movies aimed at younger audiences, it's still a small treat for our ears.

While the direction isn't particularly remarkable, the writing is thoughtful and intelligent. From jabbing at rightwing nonsense to playfully intoning progressive ideals; from catty teen sniping to cheeky one-liners and friendly cajoling - the dialogue is keen and entertaining. The narrative, if uncomplicated, is written well - coherent, engrossing, and whole. There's not a great deal of depth to most of the characters, but the assembled cast inhabits their roles so capably, and believably, as to inject more personality than we're led to think they had on paper.

Truthfully, I had low expectations going in; I gather a sense that 'Chastity bites' hasn't been well-received in the grand scheme of things. But I should know better by now - I've seen enough movies dismissed by others, that I've greatly enjoyed, that counting out a feature before I see it for myself is a mistake. I think this is really well made, and simply fun.

I won't pretend it's perfect, because it's not. Admittedly the premise portends more visceral content than what we actually get. Any viewer who isn't receptive to more lighthearted, feel-good fare should probably look elsewhere. Yet the film, as it is, doesn't ever actually pretend to be anything it's not. If a little cheesy, 'Chastity bites' is a solidly crafted picture, and worth watching if you come across it.

John V. Knowles' "Chastity Bites" is a horror comedy that takes the classic 80's idea of fun-time slasher delights. Then mixes that with a fascination for vintage, supernatural idolatry, and upbeat, comedy-camp satire. The film stars Allison Scagliotti, Francia Raisa, Louise Griffiths, Eddy Rioseco, Amy Okuda, Jennifer Gimenez.. "Chastity Bites" is Knowles' directorial debut and my only thought is "why in the h*ll did it take this long?!". The style, feel, and look of the film is that of a seasoned director whose work is effortlessly executed.

"Chastity Bites" follows a group of high school students both frienemies and foes, challenged with the typical social hurdles and proclivities, facing a darker sinister force out to build them up just to tear them down-Lady Bathory. Liz Bathor is on an unholy mission to see that the young ladies of the local high school stay pure and chaste. It is a clever story that is energetic, quick witted and funny. The humor is both straight forward cheese ball humor blended with the darker satirical cultural quips that aren't as "surface". It is one of the few films that I have seen in a long while that fully completes the story arch fully with the same intensity and conviction from start to finish.

The acting is something that pleasantly surprised me, going into the film I was expecting some fumbling by the actors on the dialog and character interaction and elements meant to create a relatable foundation between the actor and audience. At times it seems those fears were to be met but in almost every scene the cast manages to keep the comedic timing without falling flat, and for the depth of dialog, pop culture referencing and repartee this film carries, it isn't an easy feat for Indie films to pull off. "Chastity Bites" is a modern classic that gives good 80's homage without coming off as cheap or forced.

The special effects and soundtrack are timeless and entertaining. The effects remind me of classic 80's horror techniques that never fade, offering good, visual kill scenes, with very minimal CGI. The fact that the film stays closer to the darker side the horror comedy than "spoof" films helps make "Chastity Bites" a film that will be enjoyable time and time again. Plus you can't get a better character than Elizabeth Bathory when dealing with virginity and eternal youth while poking fun at social obsessions and cultural hypocrisies. The soundtrack, both musical and sound effects, create a fun, energy that never holds the film back or feels out of step with Knowles intentions. I really enjoyed this film and think all horror/comedy fans and slasher fans alike should check it out!

Right, well the 2013 horror comedy "Chastity Bites" from writer Lotti Pharriss Knowles and director John V. Knowles was a movie that had eluded me entirely. I happened to stumble upon the movie by random chance here in 2024, and given it being a horror comedy that I hadn't already seen, of course I found the time to sit down and watch it.

While the movie certainly was watchable, I was left with a sense of 'was that really it?' once the movie came to an end. It felt somewhat forgettable, so I hadn't exactly been missing out on a particularly stellar horror comedy experience here. So writer Lotti Pharriss Knowles didn't really manage to win me over with the script delivered for director John V. Knowles to bring to the screen.

The acting performances in the movie were good. I wasn't familiar with a single actress or actor on the cast list, and that is actually something I enjoy. Why? Well, then there are no associations to previously portrayed characters in other movies. And it is always enjoyable to get to watch new and unfamiliar talents on the screen.

Visually, then "Chastity Bites" wasn't outstanding. Not that it was not good, but there just wasn't any real special effects in the movie of noteworthy mentioning.

Watchable, sure, but hardly a memorable horror comedy movie. And this is not a movie that will ever find its way back a second time to my screen.

My rating of "Chastity Bites" lands on a flat five out of ten stars.

It's not very often a film takes you by surprise without resorting to clichés and wasted potential when there's so much or little to follow. Most films these days that attempt to pay homage by 'spoofing' or other forms of respect aren't always executed properly. But in this case, Chastity Bites attempts something different at its best but still has some hiccups that prevents it from being the most ingenious out of the many creations that either feels rehashed or incomplete.

The story follows a writer named Leah that becomes suspicious of a newly profound abstinence educator that schemes an army of virgins to please her vicious desires to collect blood to contain her youth. Of course convincing the entire school would be harder than assassinating an immortal masked murderer, but this doesn't seem like a heavy situation as Leah decides to take matters into her own hands to save her companion in time before she too is slaughtered like other unfortunate victims in their prime.

The film is assembled with a cast that does all of their parts well but also suffers from having some that feel either very unused or simply there to suffer their demise. If we spent more time with some of the characters and the film had taken a darker turn where it felt less like an outdated sitcom, perhaps it would have succeeded more where other films with a similar premise didn't. However, complete credibility for effort to everyone and what it tried is surely due and this film can still be considerably an enjoyable presentation if you can extract the lack of tension and some goofy elements that some may find very distracting.

For that, let's enjoy this cup of virgin blood that tastes a little like water for what it's worth and not less of what it could have been.

It's watchable, but the political messaging is obvious and heavy, and the insane amount of shallow stereotyping is gratuitous. Liberal though I am, the far left messaging was cringe.

It was a great idea for a movie, but it definitely fell short.