Nuestro video prohibido

Okay, in case you haven't already heard, 'Sex Tape' has been pretty much slated everywhere. Currently it's up for goodness knows how many 'Razzie' awards for how bad it is. And, if you check out the online reviews, you'll see that most people pretty much agreed with its nominations.

So, I sat down to watch it, confident in the knowledge that I'd probably be turning it off at about the half hour mark. I actually sat through it all the way.

Yes, it's not that good. If you're looking for a laugh-a-minute comedy then you won't find it here. Also, if you're looking for some sort of touching, heart-felt comedy, you won't find that here, either. However, if you're generally okay with comedy which is totally based around sex and don't have your expectations too high, then it's not as bad as some people are making it out to be.

I read that much of the hate towards this film centres around the on-screen chemistry between Cameron Diaz and Jason Segel. I can see where this is coming from. Most of the time the pair of them play off each other pretty well, but there were certainly a few scenes where their relationship felt very awkward, forced and even scripted. Diaz handles it better than Segel and she's definitely doing her best to keep the film going.

Before you watch this film, stop for a moment to ponder its title. Sex Tape. Does that really conjure up images of high-brow drama and sophistication? Hopefully not. It's pretty much telling you what to expect on the label. I think the trick to getting something out of this is to suitably lower your expectations and accept it for what it is – a pretty run-of-the-mill comedy which has its moments, but, ultimately, you probably won't remember for too long. Don't hate it based on what you've heard, just make sure you're in the mood for what it is before you contemplate sitting down for an hour and a half to watch it.

Cameron Diaz and Jason Segel play married couple Annie and Jay, who are dismayed to realise that leading a hectic family life has had a seriously negative impact on their physical relationship. When they find themselves with an evening free from the kids, the couple decide to try and revitalise their love-life by filming themselves performing EVERY position from 70s manual The Joy of Sex. The proverbial hits the fan, however, when the couple realise in horror that their current iPad has synced their home-made porn with all of the other tablets they have previously owned-tablets that they have given away as gifts to various friends and associates.

For most of its running time, Sex Tape smacks of desperation, chucking in as much unsophisticated sexual humour as the R rating will allow, but rarely getting the expected laughs; when Jack Black and Rob Lowe provide a film's funniest moments, then Houston, we have a problem. Of course, for many men, the biggest lure will undoubtedly be the sight of Diaz in the altogether, and at 42, she still has a very commendable body; unfortunately, facially speaking, she has started to resemble Jack Nicholson in Batman, which is just a bit off-putting-although not nearly as off-putting as Segel's hairy ass, which gets far too much screen time for my liking. Let's just say that the sight of Diaz and Segel rutting really ain't all that sexy.

The film also suffers from a typically maudlin Hollywood finale in which our adventurous couple's ordeal helps them to remember just why they fell in love in the first place. Gack!

Cameron Diaz headlined a shoddy comedy that opened earlier in 2014, "The Other Woman", but instead of improving from the mistake of choosing that script to further her career, Diaz outdoes her poor script selection with "Sex Tape". The adjective "atrocious" was used in numerous film reviews in describing "Sex Tape". Atrocious is such a jarring word, it sounds like it could tear skin if used too aggressively. The term should only be used selectively, but the quality of the screenplay used to produce "Sex Tape" creates justifiable cause to snort that word every second of the feeble film.

In "Sex Tape", Diaz and Jason Segal's characters, Jay and Annie, create their three-hour sex video using an iPad. Their captured copulation becomes a "must-see" by anyone in the film with knowledge of the recording. Maybe that's what Director Jake Kasdan hoped would be the reaction to his newly released comedy, but the final result does not warrant a compulsive urge to see it, nor does it scream box-office sellout. Once they absorb the first ten minutes, audiences will react with a desire to run away from the theater instead of a continued persistence to watch it. The talent of Diaz and Segal is squandered into superficial characters and a defective plot line. Diaz declares her agenda as an actress with "Sex Tape". As mentioned earlier, she starred in another horrid effort this year, "The Other Woman", and what both movies have common are crude, oversimplified stories that can be accessed by just about anyone in the target audience demographic. Pursuing challenging roles like she did in "Being John Malkovich", "Something About Mary", and "Vanilla Sky" has seemed to have vanished from Diaz's current plans. Instead, she seems focused on being a top-rated actress at the box-office. If I'm completely incorrect and these scripts are the best she is offered, then her time is done and she should surrender.

For the material she uses, Diaz does fine in her role. I actually have no squabbles about anything she contributes as an actress to "Sex Tape". Too bad no other film element is aiding her like a script, a well-written character, a competent director or a co-star in Jason Segal, whose discouraging performance is barely worth mentioning. Segal's reputation reminds us he's reliable, but his work here suggests a professional decline. He is dormant most of the film. One of his character's "exclamatory" lines includes an "I'm so excited right now," but he says it so lethargically that I was not sure if his character was being sincere or sarcastic.

"Sex Tape" lacks the nerve to carry out the implications of its risqué title and premise. The film slaps its cards on the table in the first 30 minutes, then fritters an hour of your life away on plot developments that travel to insane levels past the original concept and fruitless dialogue that talks in circles. "Sex Tape" has all the talk and hype, but the final product is shallow and slightly perverted.

The lesson that can be imparted from "Sex Tape" is that some trailers do not lie. If it has a name that screams "RAZZIE!" and hokey previews, then it's probably going to expel respect out of the reputation of the once acclaimed Diaz and the always-promising Segal. Those who wisely avoided the trailers are in the safe zone, but everyone else who takes pleasure in seeing Diaz's eternal charm sparkle the screen and hoped that maybe "Sex Tape" would be something irreverently fun like "Bad Teacher" will be proved wrong.

½ / * * * *

This is the problem with going out with friends who have very different taste in films than you... you get dragged to go see stuff like this, stuff that you would have otherwise not seen. I've gotten really tired of Jason Segal doing his usual comedy routine in everything he comes out in. I'm so sick of him. Cameron Diaz is charming enough and definitely does her best, but there's just so much one can do with the material. The supporting performances aren't bad, in particular Rob Lowe who is pretty hilarious. The scenes in his house are easily the only good thing about the film, and seeing as how that part was pretty hilarious, I can't give it such a lower score.

Jay (Jason Segel) and his girlfriend Annie (Cameron Diaz) love each other and have sex in the most unusual places. They get married and have two children, and soon their sex life is almost inexistent. One night, Annie leaves their children with her mother to have a night of sex with Jay, but they are tense and fail. Annie suggests Jay to make a home video to rekindle their sexual life and they have three hours of kinky sex.

Annie asks Jay to delete the footage but he forgets and leaves it in a cloud. Soon they search the Ipods they have given to their friends to promote Jay's songs to delete the video. But Jay receives a phone call from someone that has had access to the video. Who might be the mysterious intruder?

"Sex Tape" is an unfunny and disappointing comedy with a promising storyline. Most of the situations and characters are silly or stupid. The cameo of Jack Black and many scenes of Cameron Diaz are the best in this forgettable movie. My vote is four.

Title (Brazil): "Sex Tape: Perdido na Nuvem" ("Sex Tape – Lost in the Cloud")