Legend Quest

I was so hopeful that SyFy had something with this series...but I was wrong. I am a real life archaeologist and the amount of work we have to do to even get a small idea of what we are trying to find is enormous. This crackpot makes wild guesses and gives us all a bad name. My way of explaining his research and outrages assumptions is: if there is fish on the menu of the restaurant in which he is eating...then Jesus must have been born in the basement. Not only does he make wild assumptions, and act like it is his superior intellect that leads him to these conclusions but he searches for things we are not even sure really exist. Or even better yet he whole heartedly assumes they have supernatural powers. The only redeeming thing about this show is that it takes us to really cool archaeological sites, otherwise, it isn't worth the time. It is an embarrassment to the field of archaeology. I could say more but the other reviewers are doing an excellent job letting you know this show is terrible.

WTH was SyFy thinking when the green-lighted this show? The greatest salesperson in the world is whoever convinced the suits that this was a good idea.

The premise itself is interesting and had potential: someone scouring the world to find long-lost items of great interest and historical significance. The problem, as other reviewers have already pointed out, is that said protagonist is hunting for things that probably NEVER existed! Excalibur? Come on; it's a legend, a fairy tale. Someone resembling Arthur may have lived (doubtful, though), but there was no Camelot, no Merlin, and definitely no Excalibur. And has he every actually found any of these legendary items he's sought? You get one guess.

I could go on, but you get the point.

I have no idea how this show was green-lit, or how it got away with the shoddy work that it did. The editing is disgustingly terrible. The "evidence" they use to justify recording is laughable. It's a show that has nothing to show for its expense, yet they try to convince the audience that the team is perpetually on the verge of discovering something groundbreaking. It's insulting, and a perfect example of "investigative" reality shows on the paranormal that have gone too far.

SyFy's new reality series Legend Quest has a premise that is almost too good to resist: Indiana Jones meets Man Vs. Wild. Legend Quest follows Scottish historian Ashley Cowie as he traverses the globe in the search for ancient artifacts thought only to exist in myth and legend. The first episode finds the permanently unshaven Ashley and his female sidekick/producer Kinga Phillips on the hunt for the Ark Of The Covenant and later the Mayan Talking Cross. Legend Quest quickly establishes what sort of show it's going to be when Ashley says "you may know the Ark of the Covenant from Raiders Of The Lost Ark" – or the Bible, right, Ashley? You do remember the Ark of the Covenant was in the Bible first?

There are two ways to look at a show like Legend Quest; you can either switch your brain off completely and enjoy the pulse-pounding Da Vinci Code style action adventure, or you can spend more than a moment thinking about what's happening and be insulted by the daftness of it all. Legend Quest is so incredibly stupid and misleading that it's almost impossible to just go along for the ride. Don't get me wrong, twelve year old me would have eaten this crap up. Ancient symbols, globe trotting adventurers and the idea that archeology was all about carrying flaming torches whilst diving into caves; I couldn't get enough of that stuff as a kid. If Legend Quest was a scripted series I could probably get behind it but by presenting all of this nonsense as "fact" it's yet another irresponsible reality offering from SyFy after their flagrantly dishonest Haunted Collector.

In the first half of the episode our heroic lead Ashley zips around with the world with his crew by his side uncovering all sorts of amazing clues that will lead him to the final resting place of the Ark of the Covenant. As intelligent human beings we know that Ashley is not going to find the Ark of the Covenant because that's the sort of discovery that would have made the news at some point. Despite this Legend Quest goes to great lengths to convince us that Ashley actually discovers the Ark without, you know, actually discovering the Ark. He first visits a village in Ethiopia where the symbols of a two headed eagle and of a Knights Templar cross lead him to Tuscany, Italy. In Italy he speaks with an actual Knights Templar which he's allowed to do because Ashley is also a Knights Templar, because why wouldn't he be. A knowing look from this wise old man sends Ashley to a church in France where he definitely one hundred percent comes across an Ark sized tomb that most probably has the Ark hidden inside it.

As part of the order of the Knights Templar Ashley chooses not to go any further because the Knights Templar obviously buried it for a reason. As Ashley crouches in front of a stone wall he intones "I may have come as close as anyone to the Ark of the Covenant." The key word being 'may'. In fact, most of what Ashley says is filled with words like that. On his Mayan adventure he says things like "This could be evidence they were here" and "It makes total sense that's where they would have taken the cross next" and "This could be the alter". Nothing is a definite, obviously, because Ashley is just making half of this crap up. There are a lot of theories and guess work on display here, and the second quest comes to a halt a stone or two away from that elusive talking cross. "The rock was too unstable to move safely" he laments.

Each week you can guarantee that Ashley will get closer than anyone ever has to these lost artifacts but something will stop him from moving that one last rock, or opening that one final door, or pushing aside that one remaining shrub. That would be fine if Legend Quest didn't take everything so damn seriously. Ashley Cowie is a hyperactive dimwit who bounces around the world making wild accusations and taking giants leaps of faith. You could pass this off as a bit of fun if the show was willing to acknowledge that 90% of what it delivers is complete bullshit. Ashley is apparently an actual historian, and you can't imagine he's taken terribly seriously by his colleagues if he really thought he came within inches of the Ark of the Covenant and didn't knock down the wall just to check. Legend Quest's ability to pass off completely fictional situations with a straight face would make even Bear Grylls blush. This is fraudulent nonsense that continues SyFy's recent run of blatantly lying to its audience in the name of 'reality' TV.

I have only been able to catch 2 episodes of Legend Quest. It is a well choreographed and edited show and makes a good travelogue with gorgeous scenery and a good history lecture of ancient legends. But I have a problem with the conclusions at the end.

I was really upset when the host theorized that the spearhead that pierced Christ was secreted in Area 51. Though not admitted publicly, the spearhead recovered by General Patton was stored in the Fort Knox Gold Repository. The crown of King Stephan of Hungary was stored there as well but was better publicized, especially when President Carter decided to give it back to Hungary while the country was still under communist rule (which upset my Hungarian born wife to no end as she was afraid the communists would destroy it). It is logical to assume that many historical artifacts are stored at Fort Knox other than just tons of gold bullion. But don't try to sneak in there to look for it. You won't make more than 10 yards inside the fence before becoming history yourself.

Another episode was on the Stone of Divinity (or something like that). The search and scenery were well presented but heavily edited. The scene of finding what appears to be the stone was strictly dramatics. The flooring with the trap door is less than 20 years old (no mildew or dry rot on the beams) so the caretakers of the Castle on Iona have known a black monolith of some sort has been down there a long time.

Perhaps the best looking part of the show is Kinga Phillips. Though her biography shows her as being born in Poland, the name Kinga is Hungarian. That's the same name as my wife's Hungarian sister, and one of our nieces by her brother. She is a professional actress and not an archaeologist but works well with the host as well as being eye appealing.

So, if the endings and findings were done more realistically (such as the Iona custodian telling them there's a big black rock in that small room under a trap door), I wouldn't groan so much.

And as for Groom Lake Air Force Base (science-fictionally called Area 51), give me a break. You can see every building on Google Earth and read the runway markings. At best I think it's a decoy to keep UFO hunters busy and security personnel and procedures trained and practiced for real secret bases.

Yet I still like the show but mostly for entertainment rather than historical accuracy.