Hollywood Sex Wars

When I sat down in 2022 to watch the 2011 comedy "Hollywood Sex Wars", I have to admit that I was expecting to watch something that would make me laugh.

But that was not the case with the movie written and directed by Paul Sapiano. This movie was just blatantly horrible and boring. It felt like I was watching a movie concocted by a randy teenager. Amazing how some scripts actually make the transition from paper to actual footage on the screen.

"Hollywood Sex Wars" was a swing and a miss, and it most certainly didn't make me laugh, not even once. Actually, the storyline was so boring and pointless that I started using my phone and looking at stuff online instead. Needless to say that the movie never caught on after that point.

The acting performances in the movie were semi-adequate. I mean, the actors and actresses virtually had nothing to work with in terms of a proper script or interesting characters. But I will say that they definitely put their hearts and efforts into it, and it wasn't traditional low budget, questionable acting performances that you see in some movie, so that counted for something. Needless to say that I wasn't familiar with a single actor or actress in this movie.

I am sure that there is an audience out there for a movie such as "Hollywood Sex Wars". I just wasn't in that particular audience, as I prefer a tad more to movies than sex jokes, dildos and topless women.

My rating of "Hollywood Sex Wars" lands on a more than generous three out of ten stars.

Of course this is not a real war, but since the word is being used in the title, you might as well use it for some puns. The movie itself does have some fair points and there is something to say about the general theme it tries to portray. There is a lot that one could've done with that theme. I'm not even going to blame the actors (I'll give them the benefit of the doubt and pretend it was the way they were directed), but the screenwriter could've done a better job (unless they didn't want him too, of course).

There is nudity and profanity, but you can check those boxes when you see the rating, so don't feel offended if you watch it and you think it's too racy (when it actually isn't that much, especially if you look at french cinema). Don't waste your time would be my advice, but with comedy it's tough to say, what makes people laugh ...

I don't think this is as LA-centric as some people make it out to be. Anyone in a city with a nightlife can pretty much relate to how hard it is to find someone to date, and how often people flat out refuse to settle, either because they want to keep their options open or because they see relationships as being more than just about satisfying emotional needs.

Beyond that, this movie takes no prisoners. It makes fun of relationships, it makes fun of players, it makes fun of women who care more about how much a guy makes than who he is, it makes fun of drugs, it makes fun of city life, it makes fun of irresponsible people, it makes fun of hipsters, it makes fun of people who still harbor dreams of their band making it big past the age of 30, it makes fun of subcultures, it makes fun of plastic surgery, it makes fun of Star Wars cosplayers and other fetishes -- it makes fun of everything.

This movie is like the honey badger. It doesn't care. It just takes what it wants.

Seeing the title, people may assume it's another Asylum skin film. This film is similar to those Asylum ones in its plot but there seems to be more detail and more drama than those standard comedies.

Labeled as a comedy, nothing is exactly clever or witty. No laughs but it is watchable. The lead character is surprisingly likeable for the womanizer type and the clients he helps out aren't bad either. The women do vary from the smart mastermind scheming type to the silly and clueless. No problems there.

In the end, it is predictable in how both genders are scheming against one another and of course each side finds out. The voice narration in the end from one of the characters felt somewhat out of place.

A notch above several of those T & A Asylum films. Although nothing exactly special. A one time watch is enough.

A lot of movies have tried to portray the sort of characters that one sees in Hollywood Sex Wars without much success. Somehow, this comedy manages to make everyone come out looking human. Yes, the situations are extreme and often hilariously ridiculous, but even the craziest characters come out looking human, which adds the missing degree of realism.

The writing is smart, but the jokes range from insidery to lowest common denominator, so there is a little something for everyone to enjoy. Some people have said this isn't a very good date movie, but I think it is, even if the couple watching enjoy it for altogether different reasons.