- Jodi: [about Desi] Everything that comes out of her mouth is a lie. Everything that goes into her mouth is a dick.
- Barry: That's the one thing you don't do. You don't tell her you took Viagra. I'm pretty sure that's on the warning label.
- Ronnie: [Referring to Graham Parker video they are viewing] What are you doing?
- Cat: I'm contextualizing him as one of the great figures in rock history.
- Ronnie: You can't show him in his prime in '77 and then jump straight to him as he is now. It's terrifying. You have to reverse it. You have got to show him as he is now, very briefly, and then show him in 1977. You have got to Benjamin Button it.
- Cat: I don't know what you're talking about. All rock stars are older now. Steven Tyler, David Bowie, Mick Jagger...
- Pete: Paul McCartney.
- Ronnie: Okay, stop it. Everybody that you are mentioning looks like an old woman now. You're just mentioning a bunch of Jessica Tandys. Keith Richards gets away with it, but that's because Keith Richards looked 70 when he was 40. And now that he's 70 he looks 69. He's regenerating.
- Larry: I just figured out what your problem is. You hate Jews! Which is so odd, because your children are Jewish.
- Debbie: Don't play the Jew Card, Larry.
- Larry: I'm not playing any Jew Card.
- Debbie: Seriously? It's used up.
- Larry: You can't use up a Jew Card. That's the whole point of a Jew Card.
- Barry: That's right. You can't use it up. It goes forever.
- Graham Parker: Got a bit of a problem. Touch of gout.
- Pete: Gout?
- Graham Parker: Yeah, my whole family, they all had gout.
- Pete: Jesus.
- Ronnie: That's very unfortunate.
- Graham Parker: My auntie Queenie, she had a foot like the size of a small pig. I've got a photo of it.
- Ronnie: I'd love to see that photo of that gout foot.
- Graham Parker: A couple of bunions as well.
- Ronnie: Fuck.
- Debbie: I don't want to shop at old lady stores. I don't want to go to J. Jill and Chico's and Ann Taylor.