Piraña 2DD

This was more enjoyable than I thought. The acting was not as bad as some of the reviewers say, and for a film that doesn't take itself seriously, neither should you. I actually didn't mind the movie being short, after all it was always hard to stretch the storyline more than an hour.

The whole movie was more like a spoof, and somehow I felt Christopher Lloyd, Ving Rhames and of course The Hoff all added to the fun. The Hoff in particular was great. His role really suited him. He also had a bit more screen time than I would've thought.

I didn't see this in 3D, and I'm not sure if that would've changed my rating. There was a fair bit of gratuitous nudity, but I suppose the gratuitous gore balances that out.

So if you find gratuitous blood, body parts and boobs (and screaming) hilarious, this movie is worth a look over a beer and popcorn. And if you don't like it, it will be over before you know it.

If you have seen any one of the Piranha movies going all the way back to 1978 then what is shown here is more of the same. By casting David Hasselhoff as himself they showed they really weren't even trying with this one.

The only awards the female lead Danielle Panabaker might win for her performance here is an Amber Tamblyn lookalike contest.

Set in the water park equivalent of a strip club with profoundly unlikeable and spectacularly dumb characters the essential hook here is to show naked people (Mostly women) and gore which is not something everyone wants to see together or even separately.

The gross-out factor gets to be pretty intense and for the second one of these movies in a row male genital mutilation is served up for audience approval and that isn't even the most disgusting thing shown.

What we see readily earns this flick its R rating within 10 minutes. There is political incorrectness and then there is Girls Gone Wild out-takes intercut with cheap indie horror. The piranhas look like claymation when you see them up close. You'd expect more from a production with a estimated $20 million budget.

Shot in Wilmington. North Cackalacky is rapidly becoming Hollywood Southeast.

Is this movie bad? Yes. Did anyone want it? No. Is it hilarious to watch people's minds being blown by how much this movie sucks? Yes. Watching it alone is really boring but making fun of it with your friends might be the only saving grace this film has.

That was shocking, all those that couldn't get out the pool well... this was meant to be a piranha film but where were they at? There was no logic to this film. Don't put yourself through the pain of watching this film.

Promising more of what Piranha brought you, this delivers less. A lot less. Less humor, less gore, less tension, less nudity, less edginess. Overall, it's just like one of those rip-off movies that comes out for rental right before a major movie comes out on disc. Maybe not a good example, but when Tom Cruise's War of the Worlds was due to be released, you saw knockoffs like "War Between Worlds". Those movies are drudgery to get through. It's cheap to have actors recite lines for 85 of the 90 minutes of a movie, and build a plot based upon that; but that's a different genre. When it's done and marketed as a comedy or horror, then that's a cheap rip-off. Dialog is cheap. Good, funny dialog (good writers and actors), and SFX are not cheap.

Just like a knockoff, this movie tries to be funny and fails. It tries to make you care (big mistake for comedy-horror), and really falls flat on it's face with bits of drama that are tedious to get through. Special FX are blown away by Sci-fi channel direct to disc releases. The original's SFX were not state-of-the-art all the time (most scenes were though, especially where there's gore), this one the SFX are not even TV-show decent. This would have been forgivable if the movie wasn't so boring in between those few shots. Overall, this is a boring, PG-13 movie that fails in every genre. It's not even so bad that it's funny (I watch some very low-grade B-Movies too). It's better than Thankskilling, but at least TK hit it's intended low mark of humor and quality. I'd put this movie in the same league as Black Swarm or Blood Monkey.

The only reason someone would see this is because of the titular link to the fantastically better movie, or because there's bodacious boobies on the box. Renting this and expecting either of these components to be there even in high dilution will surely disappoint you. If you can catch it for free via streaming when you need a nap, well then it would be good for that.