Die in a Gunfight

Within the first 10 minutes, this movie establishes a few things: The main character is unbearably and pointlessly annoying. The narrator sounds like your stoner friend in college. Every character in the film, no matter how irrelevant, needs to be introduced with a Guy Ritchie rip-off freeze frame. The sound editing is laughably amateur. The script is so full of cringe it hurts. The only thing impressive about this film is how badly it fails after trying so hard. I'm sure a large portion of viewers watched because of Alexandra Daddario, but even if you're her biggest fan, this is one performance you'll want to skip.

It was a fun story, but all the overshooting attempts at flair and pizzazz, got stale and annoying real quick. It felt more cartoonish than a romantic thriller. I don't mind commentary in a film, but there were too many attempts at humor that failed, as it did with some of the dialogue. The entire "loves to fight and lose" concept was infantile and unnecessary. Diego Boneta's character was really annoying in most of the film. I think the novice filmmakers - especially the two writers, couldn't pick a theme and stick with it. Had the cartoons been absent, and the story's tone more serious - throughout, it may have been more enjoyable. The pacing felt slow with the many long dragged out scenes, that were more filler than substance, that the 92 min runtime felt much longer. Nevertheless, the casting and performances were good for the most part, especially Travis Fimmel, and the cinematography and score probably the best features.

It's a boring B-class movie with an annoying narrator and a cliche plot. I watched for 30 minutes and then skipped to the end, which was predictable.

Alexandra is still beautiful though. So, if you want to watch it for her, go ahead. But you're better off watching True Detective, if you know what I mean.

Who was this for? I'm guessing 14-year-olds that have seen Tarantino shirts at Hot Topic and love the aesthetic pages on Instagram that have pictures of Heath Ledger. I didn't think this was going to be "Snatch" or "Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang", but I'm drinking in a hotel by myself on a work trip and was hoping it would be fun at least. I started fast-forwarding halfway though. There are no jokes, no gunfights, no interesting characters. I watched two rom-coms last night and cried about an ex. I love that stuff. This was about two rich kids that never owned cell phones (i guess) who get back together after not wanting to split up in the first place. So what was the grand act of love that brought them back together? What was the journey they had to go on? What life and death stakes were they willing to brave for each other? Let me tell you...it was just being back in the same room together after a couple of years at college apart.

They should have included a booklet about the movie and bonus lsd tabs in the physical case. That could have been a good Special Edition!