La fortaleza

Welcome fellow subscribers to our next monthly installment of "Brucey's Monthly Crappy Movies".

From our last month's installment of "Survive the Game", nothing has really changed in Fortress.

In summary, Brucey's performances keep getting worse movie after movie. Again we have his smirking monotonic lines, only louder in this one. This guy is moving backwards in time with any acting skills or ability. Stay home Brucey, please retire. He was the worst I've seen in a long time in this one. For no reason, he's angry and talking loud. None of the other actor's performances were standout, and comparing even the many no-name actors, they were more convincing than Brucey.

The stories premise was interesting by newb writer (only 2nd writing credit) Alan Horsnail, (who also wrote "Midnight in the Switchgrass", of which I actually really enjoyed), but the screenplay was riddled with holes and some of the dialogue was cringeworthy. Some of the garbage that came out of Brucey's mouth will have you say "huh?" or my heading. Any attempts at humor were also cringe.

But were I once again was surprised, is that this horribly directed mess was from a seasoned director, James Cullen Bressack, who seems to direct most of Brucey's flops. Again in this mess, he gives us choppy blurred action sequences and horrible camera work. Did he even direct his cast? A 5th grader could've directed better. There is absolutely no excuse from anyone that has 43 directorial credits giving us this garbage over and over again. It's seems Bressack learns nothing from all his previous flops. Maybe take a break and go to film school? Funny as well, I saw Emile Hirsch and Randall Emmett's names in the closing credits as writers, but nowhere to be seen on this site. I'm guessing they deleted their names out of embarrassment.

The cinematography was decent, and the score was typical B-grade cheese. The pacing was very slow, that even at 99 mins, it felt much longer. There was just too much filler and very little substance. It's a very generous 3/10, mainly all going to Kelly Greyson, who's smokeshow bod woke me up every time she appeared on screen when I was dozing off from boredom.

This movie was so bad I don't even know where to start... the over acting, the terrible one liners, the dialogue, the script, Bruce's froggy voice, it all sucks. I have no idea why this movie was ever made and no question, its not even worth a few minutes of your time. I love a good "cheesy" flick once in a while but crikey this was bad. Put it this way Hudson Hawk is better than this thing... It's like the cast was trying to make a bad movie or something... Its so bad even Nicolas Cage and John travolta passed it up... I don't know what else to say other than this flick is nothing more than another warm moist turd... Flush.

Bruce Willis and his recent films became the trade mark of cheep trash filmography. I stopped watching this after 20 minutes. The man must have serious financial problems, participating over and over in cheep and bad films. Not even for free this one. What a shame.

Man oh man. This one is BAD.

Willis does not care anymore. Perhaps it wasnt enough money, he was constipated, or having a stroke.

His acting is plain. Barely moves around, and speaks without emotion, like reciting lines in a play you just dont want to appear.

Action scenes are so shaky, that you cant even figure out whats going on.

And the characters ? Wow. The worst offender, Ken, is so annoying that youll be dissapointed that he doesnt get killed.

Bruce Willis is the new Steven Seagal. Barely moves, barely acts, and we are supposed to believe he is the only one who can save them all.

I kind of like some cringeworthy movies. But this one, is just BAD. (and there is a sequel coming.. :S)

Another crap movie with Willis. Apparently he will do anything for a paycheck these days. It's sad to see an A-list actor end his career like this. If you wish to be in a movie with Bruce Willis just send him $3.99. No need for a script as he doesn't use them anymore.