Artois the Goat

This is the story of a not-that-bright man (who bears a slight resemblance to Steven Colbert) pursuing his dream of making artisinal goat cheese. It is not a comedy about the trials of trying to keep goats as housepets.

He is so clueless, the first milk goat he buys is male. He gets no support. His girlfriend wants him to slog away at a mind-numbing laboratory job. She has no sympathy at all for his desire to escape.

One of the best scenes in the movie is a conversation with a hermit landowner who had dreamt all his life of raising basset hounds. It failed miserably and now he just wants to die.

The only person who gives him the least encouragement is a failed paranoid restaurant owner.

It is comedy, so you know he must inevitably triumph. He persists at making cheese, getting smarter and smarter with each attempt, so it is not totally out of blue when he finally succeeds. He has some help from a celestial holy French-speaking goat and a celestial holy writer of cheese text books.

The goats don't pay that big a role but when they are on screen they are delicate, clean and pretty. Usually the idea of cheese coming from animal udders is quite revolting, but these animals don't do that to me.

It is done in a melodramatic, over-the-top, pantomime style.

If I were writing the film, our hero would run off into the sunset with the German restaurant owner who had stuck by the hero, not the woman who bullied, carped, belittled and repeatedly abandoned him. But that would have freaked out the majority of the audience. He is in for a life of misery with her. He is a kind soul. He deserves better.

While big budget cinema has its pearls and is certainly entertaining, it's this kind of movie that is really fun to watch.

The budget on this one was small, I never doubted that (they even recycled several sets and re-spotted them to Detroid). The acting of the main cast was really touching and very convincing, even the almost surreal (first) dialog with the future "land-lord".

In general the movie is about love, about the love to your work, about the passion you put into it and it's about the love between people. While this main theme is spiced up with the whole goat cheese motif, it makes no mistake to point out that even if you are pursuing a vision, there are obstacles and you can fail altogether. But all ends well in the end.

I did not know what to expect of this movie at all. I was worried it might turn into one of those gourmet movies that make no sense at all, or simply fire up a barrage of comments on how food should be. But no! It's about the handiwork, the craft and art of food making. And that was likely the point where the movie got me. The naive characters, or so it would seem, and their pursuit of happiness is really heartwarming and touching, even though at times it's closer to a fairy-tale than to real life. But I do not give a goat's bleat. Except for a few minor glitches and unneeded slapstick parts it's a pearl among many worthless movies.

Artois the Goat is like the best goat cheese slightly tangy, fresh, original and more than a little unexpected. Built on vignettes the film strings together the story of a frustrated lab technician, his girlfriend, and some way out friends, and the quest to make cheese.

This offering is rather charming, eccentric, and better than most big budget comedies. It doesn't look small budget in the main due to its heart: it actually invests care in the comedy and though a little too off balanced in places it is genuinely interesting and entertaining.

It strives a little too hard to be an indie in places, but succeeds à la Amelie in using cutting to accent the story.

Overall we actually really enjoyed this cheesy tale of romance, goats, and washed rinds and found it original, fun, and sweet - not bad at all....

Artois the Goat Written and directed by Cliff and Kyle Bogart

This comes as a recommendation that I foolishly allowed it to lapse and get buried somewhat. I'm sorry. I've been doomsday prepping for this year's various levels of catastrophes. My brain while wandering around the horrors of life in the quarantine remembered about this particular film. It could be a nice change of pace and it certainly was. This is Artois The Goat which is available to watch on Tubi if you get a hankering.

Artois the Goat is about a lab technician who becomes obsessed with making the perfect cheese. This obsession leads him in opposition to his relationship to his girlfriend. She is changing jobs to Detroit and wants him to come with her. It seems like a simple enough premise right. Well it is full of bizarre non sequiturs. You have to be prepared for the sort of dry humor that exists in this one.

I wasn't prepared for the visual gags present in the material. It presents the ideas in a straightforward manner but at the same time you can't help but laugh at how Virgil continues to mess things up in the most obvious way. Virgil is so obsessed with making this cheese that it clouds everything in his life. He can't stop his pursuit.

This movie might be a tad long in the tooth but it has some scenes that will make you chuckle. So few do that sort of thing nowadays. The jokes do fade a bit in the middle when it becomes more about the relationship and less about the cheese obsession.

This is a strange one but a good strange one. I found myself chuckling at the jokes used but those chuckles were a little less when it came to the end of the movie. This is a very clever flick. I found myself drawn to the plight of the cheese man and I wanted to see him succeed and have his girlfriend stay in his life. That is a genuinely rare occurrence when that happens. I am not what you would call a people person. Not one bit. So when a movie is able to get me interested in what they're trying to handle, this is unique. One of a kind you could say. This movie shows so much of what goes into producing a rare goat cheese. I can understand the obsession.

As long as you're able to find yourself on this film's wavelength, you will have a good time with this silly and fun movie. It does meander some and it could have benefitted from a cut or three. Overall this is an enjoyable comedy. I give it a B.

This movie had a pretty good feel about it when it was taking itself seriously. The comedic aspect just felt forced and took away from the story.

There was a slight unnecessary mystical element to the film, that should have been left out of the film or built upon instead.

The acting was OK for what it was, but there are definitely some spotty moments that took me out of the film. The main characters were decent but the really insignificant characters were quite bad.

The strongest aspect of the film came from the main character's passion and obsession for making a good cheese and the way the filmmakers conveyed that.

I felt Artois had potential but wasn't executed well. It's still an entertaining film, and has it's good moments, if you can sit through the bad ones. I did consider giving up on it, but I kept watching and paid off.