Snow Falls

I watched a really bad Argentinian horror movie yesterday which I also scored with a two (a low rating that doesn't happen often with me) so I thought this week couldn't get any worse. What was I wrong! Snow Falls was slightly better as for the quality of the images but the story, if you can call it that, was beyond dumb. It's been a while since I was so flabbergasted by a bad story. I won't spoil anything, if there's even anything to spoil here. The story is so dumb, some kids go on a trip in a luxuary chalet, with all the comfort, open fire, blankets, plenty of wood everywhere, and they still manage to talk about hypothermia whilst walking around in their tank top. You couldn't think of a dumber horror (that's what it's categorized as, you wonder why) movie. They supposedly run out of food after half a day but still have food at the end. Not to mention the blizzard, what a joke, there's more snow in frigging Spain. It looked like a nice cozy winter instead of a devastating cyclone bomb. Avoid this movie at all costs, except if you're a bit masochistic and like to be annoyed for one hour and thirteen minutes.

They are literally in the wood. Surrouned by trees. They have gas stove. Tons on jackets and blankets. Cabin is made of strong wood and even a single snowflake is not inside... and they keep panicking that they will die of coldness? No other explanation except young are today completelly useless, or the director make this cause he lost some bet.

Medical student is story for herself, if there is any justice they would at least eat her first time when she suggested that they should not fall asleep so we can call this a horror.

They were for 3 days there and acted like it is end of the world.

Shame.

This movie starts off with beautiful drone visuals, but it quickly turns into something as if a group of film students rented an Airbnb and had the collective thought of making a movie about being stuck there in a snow storm. For being a movie filmed entirely in one setting, the occasional shots of the trees outside doesn't help the story when they're all bare. I especially love the one scene after someone dies and they go outside and it's calm, then quickly switches to harsh blowing snow that is very obviously a filter they applied post-processing.

Lastly and most importantly, this film projects a misinformed understanding of hypothermia. But perhaps it's true when you, and everyone around you, is a moron.

When a group of college friends go to one of their parent's cottages, at a ski resort called Snow Falls, for New Year's Eve...they end up getting trapped, with no power, little food, and a supply of firewood that they are burning through quick.

However, they still have a safe house...and blankets...and each other...

So when the one girl- traumatized by the dying words of her mother- takes over, with all these rules, designed to prevent hypothermia...all logic- and any semblance of common sense- is just thrown out the window.

Because...though, it would no doubt be cold. It wouldn't be to the point where they are actually hypothermic.

So the fact that she suggests they "don't fall asleep", only acts to make matters worse...as being sleep deprived would go to adversely effect their psychological state.

Which is what the entire premise of this film is based on.

As they can't even go three damn days before they all start tripping out.

Which is just as ridiculous as not falling asleep at all during that timeframe.

Because, they are quite literally surrounded by trees...yet make no attempt to collect firewood at any point.

Which would have solved all of their nonsensical problems.

Not to mention...THERE IS BARELY EVEN ANY FRIGGING SNOW...!?!?

For anyone who lives in an area where it snows...you'll look at the rate at which the CGI (ugh) snow is coming down...and be like...hey, how pleasant.

The filmmakers make zero effort to make it seem like they are actually stuck in a blizzard (the snow doesn't even go above the soles of their boots ffs).

So it's simply laughable.

And this is before they introduce the equally absurd theme of them thinking the snowflakes are infected by some sort of virus.

Which doesn't even make any damn sense.

Their paranoid delusions are, apparently, a result of the sleep deprivation...while their sleep deprivation is all based on one chick's idiotic direction...and them collectively being too stupid to collect firewood, despite wandering around outside amongst a plethora of very accessible trees.

Literally nothing in this film makes sense.

If the writers had half a brain, they would have just made the whole thing a cannibal flick...because the only actual problem they have is a lack of food...and even that is giving them the benefit of the doubt, because they still have food at the end!!!

The entire plot here is so stupid...it's flabbergasting.

Leaving me genuinely confused about what the creators were thinking when they constructed it.

Is the whole point of this film to frustrate you, with how frustratingly dumb these characters are?

Cause if that's not it...then I just don't get it.

Hopefully this isn't foreshadowing what kind of year 2023 is going to be like for horror.

Because this move is idiotic.

Talk about a bad start to the New Year...

1 out of 10.

Well, this movie from writers Luke Genton, Colton Tran and Laura M. Young is as bad as the IMDb rating actually indicates. Yeah, sometimes you just got to stop and take heed of the warning signs before you opt to sit down and watch something.

I hadn't heard about "Snow Falls" prior to sitting down to watch it. It was a horror movie that I hadn't already seen, so of course I opted to watch it. And yeah, I had taken notice of the 2.9 rating (in this very moment I am writing this review) on IMDb, and I was a little bit hesitant about the movie. But I opted to give director Colton Tran the benefit of the doubt.

The storyline in "Snow Falls" fell short of entertaining me, much less capturing my interest. So it was a difficult movie to sit through, as the 79 minutes felt extraordinary long given the slow paced narrative and the lack of anything overly interesting happening.

Now, I wasn't familiar with the cast ensemble in the movie, and that is usually something I enjoy when I watch a movie. And I will say that they had some good enough talents on the cast list here, just a real shame that they didn't have anything worthwhile working with in terms of script, characters and dialogue.

Visually then you're not in for anything spectacular, should you opt to sit down and watch "Snow Falls". There weren't any real use of special effects throughout the course of the movie, nor did it really seem like the movie would have benefitted from it.

If you enjoy horror movies, then take heed and perhaps give "Snow Falls" a wide berth. It simply isn't worth the time, money or effort. Some of us suffered through the 79 minutes of movie so you don't have to.

My rating of "Snow Falls" lands on a three out of ten stars.