House on Hooter Hill

Look ... if you want to see breasts, a bunch of simulated sex and don't care about story or acting, 'The House on Hooter Hill' will satisfy. However there's a lot of recycling going on. That's the bottom line.

It's not easy coming up with fresh things to say about a T&A flick from director Jim Wynorski during this time period. That house. That same miserable house. 'Lust Connection', 'The Witches of Breastwick', 'The Breastford Wives' and now 'The House on Hooter Hill'. They were all filmed there. Which means repeatedly seeing the same places ... same scenes ... a lot of the same women.

Let's pull over in that exact same car and talk. Let's have sex before we get to that house. More sex in the bed / hot tub / gym / bathtub / in the woods. One guy doing the majority of the ladies in one days span. Hardcore pornstars Taylor Wane and Friday deliver in a decent girl/girl intro. Friday reappears getting frisky twice more. Hands down the best lady here with a legit sexual energy.

Of all the threadbare stories, this was the weakest. Plenty of unlikable characters, little heat in the sex scenes and the utter repetition means I didn't enjoy 'The House on Hooter Hill' as many others did. Perhaps they didn't see those similar titles.

Within the first two minutes of House on Hooter Hill, writer/director Jim Wynorski wastes no time; he immediately allows model Taylor Wane and porn-star Linda Friday, both gorgeous, busty women, to get naked, make-out, and proceed to have lesbian sex in a bubbly hot-tub on a deck of a beautiful house. The scene, admittedly, is pretty arousing and provides for probably one of the most solid scenes I have yet to see in softcore cinema in terms of intimacy and tone.

This scene only begins to set the tone for a film that stuffs so many abrupt sex scenes within its seventy-five minutes that it almost forgets it has a plot (albeit a very thin one). These kinds of films defined my childhood, especially on those late-night sleepovers with a friend or two. Hyped up on RC Cola and Sweet-N-Low, we'd wait until my folks were asleep before we scanned the premium cable channels, trying to find a show like Cathouse or Real Sex or a softcore film to satisfy our prepubescent hormones, being careful not to make a sound, just in case my parents were going to get up and go to the bathroom.

I guess you could say, just by that note alone, viewing House on Hooter Hill was a pretty nostalgic experience. While I didn't watch this particular film as a kid (I was more attached to films like The Breastford Wives, Busty Cops, and Spiderbabe), but just viewing this type of film excites me, not in the way you're immediately thinking of, but on a more personal and indescribable level. Softcore films are simultaneously dirty yet so clean and often antiseptic when you consider the limitless archives of pornography that exists on the internet that it's almost laughable they still exist.

This particular film concerns a group of female friends, who gather together when they learn that one of their fellow wealthy, horny, and enormously busty girlfriends (Taylor Wane) dies after an apparent burglar strangles her after she has sex in her hot tub. The friends gather on short notice and learn from her recorded will (why would she record her will so young?) that she has quite a large fortune waiting for her friends. In order to obtain it, one of her friends must solve a riddle, but this proves difficult when a fellow busty psychic stands in their way. On top of that, nobody can seem to stop having sex every five minutes to concentrate on the large sum of money at hand here.

The film contains several sex scenes, most of them effective in their main goal, but sometimes growing repetitive, especially when you realize the film doesn't even try to bear a serious plot, which can be disappointing. Even for a softcore film, there is some sort of standard for a film of the genre to live up to in terms of story. However, I'm hardpressed to criticize too heavily since the sex scenes are remarkably satisfying and exciting. Much like The Breastford Wives and Busty Cops, the film bears an element of attraction because of its very full female cast, not to mention just the sure lunacy of it all when it comes down to the story and its plot-points.

When it comes down to recommending House on Hooter Hill, I'll resort to saying the simple phrase, "you know who you are" in terms of whether or not you want to see this film. For a softcore film, it's well made and consistently entertaining, which will still not sell somebody who wasn't very content or interested in seeing a softcore film in the first place; it isn't as redundant and as vanilla as some of them. Story-wise, there's quite a lot to be desired, but Wynorski keeps things fun and interesting in terms of pacing, and the committed actresses all do a fine job of turning on and taking off.

Starring: Glori-Anne Gilbert, Kris Slater, Taylor Wane, and Linda Friday. Directed by: Jim Wynorski.

House on Hooter Hill (2007)

** 1/2 (out of 4)

Jim Wynorski directed this film (under his H.R. Blueberry credit) about a group of people staying at a house that is haunted by the spirit of the previous owner. Of course, with so many people together it's only natural that a lot of sex happens.

HOUSE ON HOOTER HILL is obviously a spoof of the Vincent Price classic HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL but outside of the title there's really no connection between the films and in fact this one here really doesn't pay any sort of homage to it. If you're familiar with the sexploitation pictures of Wynorski then you should already know what to expect here and that's a lot of beautiful women with big fake breasts appearing in various sex scenes.

Fans of these type of softcore pictures should find this one here to be entertaining enough for what it is. I thought the director got things off to a very quick star as you wait, oh, maybe twenty-seconds before you've got the first nude scene and a few seconds later you've got a full lesbian scene. The opening was certainly very good and got the film off to a great start.

The performances here are a lot weaker than you normally get and I honestly didn't feel that anyone in the cast really jumped out. Sure, they were all very attractive and they did the job just fine but there still wasn't anyone that really stood out. I thought the pacing of the film was quite good as well. As you'd expect, the budget here was quite low but as usual Wynorski was able to make an entertaining picture.

I'll admit some of my attraction to this came from the fact it might be another spoof or spin off of the often made over Vincent Price film, House on Haunted Hill, which it rarely resembled. While there was scant quality acting or production, the sex appeal of soft core actresses who aren't wearing any tattoos visible or larger than two inches cannot be denied. In spite of the rush by numbers assembly it was such a welcome break from the irritating distractions that plague most made for late night cable or video movies. I was also freed with a welcome vacation from girls with squeaky voices, flat chests and paper thin figures. The ending even surprised me.