This compendium of in-jokes, fetishes, silly notions and pretentious satire is typical of writer-director David Stanley's porn work, more embarrassing than entertaining. Looking beyond its knee-jerk, undeserved industry award nominations, it is an inarguable failure.
In the BTS short subject (shot by Red Ezra, an incredibly talented director for Wicked Pictures who inexplicably was demoted to nothing crew assignments while the label elected to back any old junk concocted by Stanley) David tips his hand by relating the source of arbitrary silliness like characters in animal suits appearing willy-nilly throughout the show, basically explaining how he would throw into the mix whatever he felt like. Beyond his usual foot-fetishism, this results in an indigestible, low on continuity movie as pointless as it is goofy.
So we have a self-conscious mockery of rom-com cliches, while delivering an XXX-rated rom-com that is neither funny nor romantic. Its main interest for me was how much it resembled his cheapie, scatterbrained Vivid Video movies, moreso than his later more polished (and normal) Wicked Pictures features, even though this one was made for Wicked.
As a vehicle for contract star Kirsten Price, it has her dubiously falling for yucky Randy Spears, an untalented porn screenwriter (resembling his frequent employer Stanley?) who she meets outside after watching in a porn theater a pretentious movie titled "Full on the Mouth", written by Spears as "Eric M" and directed, per its one-sheet poster, by one David Stanley. 1st in-joke alert: Eric Masterson was David's favorite actor, often standing in for the auteur on screen, in his earliest films.
What follows is stupid, even moronic scene after scene, filled with those animal characters, the crummiest sets imaginable, and rom-com cliches more as filler than strict satire. Evan Stone as a cigar-chomping producer who keeps giving writer Spears deadlines (for the sequel, titled "Just Like That" of course with a plot just like Spears' life we're watching) is horrible, hamming it up even more than usual.
Subsidiary characters are all cartoonish: Cherokee and Alexis Malone as a pair of BDSM prostitutes abusing various male animal-head clients while giving bad dating advice to Spears via those paper cup with string imitation telephones we played with as children; Gianna Lynn and Annika as twin little girls ripped off from Kubrick's "The Shining"; and Jamie Huxley as the star of "Full on the Lips" film within a film. Stanley even throws in a stupid imitation of Jack's typing the same sentence over and over, found in writer Spears' typewriter, ripped off from "The Shining". To test the film buffs in the audience, he references another horror classic, Tod Browning's 1932 "Freaks", with the prostitutes chanting "One of us, one of us..." before a threesome with Randy.
It's difficult to sit through, as the nonsense is of interest mainly to Stanley himself rather than an arm's-length viewer. After watching over 80 movies written (and most of them directed) by Stanley, I place this one into the minus column.
