Evil Bong

I was at Charles Band's Full Moon Horror Road Show a couple weeks ago and managed to score a free copy of Evil Bong, due to be released October 24th. This was the movie they were most actively promoting. Kristyn Green, who plays Janet in the movie, was in attendance and they were auctioning off a prop of Eebee, the evil bong.

If you're not familiar with Full Moon Features, they're headed by B-movie veteran Charles Band, and are mostly responsible for direct to video features the likes of Subspecies, the Puppet Master series, and Castle Freak. Full Moon's goal was to create low budget horror, sci-fi, and fantasy films while retaining a modest budget feel. He has managed to do that by using film and incorporating decent soundtracks to his features.

One part movie, one part marketing device; Evil Bong features cameos from several Full Moon features including Jack Deth of Trancers, Phil Fondacaro of Decadent Evil, Ooga Booga from Doll Graveyard, and I believe a jack-in-the-box from Demonic Toys. Also, it serves as advertisement for Band's line of extremely tacky bras, Monster Bras, that include latex mouths, sharks heads, or other excessively silly latex creations affixed to the cups. During the Road Show, shirts, DVDs, toy replicas of the Evil Bong, and Monster Bras were on sale.

So, just how is this horror comedy? About what you'd expect, not that great but entertaining. The characters are very stereotypical stoner characters. Though the portrayal of marijuana is not entirely insulting. After all, it is the bong that is evil, not the herb. There are plenty of marijuana leaf animated fades to the next scene, not unlike what they use on That 70s Show which gives the movie a sitcom feel. The soundtrack is pretty good. The actors give their best, but their best isn't very good. Bill Moseley, of Texas Chainsaw Massacre II, House of 1000 Corpses, and The Devil's Rejects, makes an appearance. Tommy Chong does too.

College nerd, Alistair (David Weidoff), moves in with stoners; Brett, Larnell, and Bachman. Soon, Larnell's special delivery arrives, a large 1960s bong from New Orleans the original owner claims is possessed, which he bought through a classified ad.

The bong is named Eebie and begins to take on more human characteristics the more they use it. Eventually, it begins to draw from them their very souls. That is when the user finds themselves in the bong world, populated by strippers both topless and in Band's Monster Bras, as well as other characters from Full Moon Features.

The bong's previous owner, Jimbo Leary (Tommy Chong), shows up to do battle with the bong if he can just keep it together long enough.

I mean like how can you not love this movie. It's literally about a bong killing people, like who came up with this stuff lmaoo i love it. You have to come into this movie with an open mind because damn the acting sucks but it's sucks in away that it's funny and it's super easy to laugh at.

The movie knows what it is and that's seriously important because it's not trying to be a serious movie about a bong killing people. It's a comedy and it did a good job at making me laugh a couple times. I can't go any higher then a 7/10 but seriously i think it's worth a watch if you want to see something completely ridiculous that really is just meant for pure fun.

I read a review of beerfest where evil bong was mentioned and thought that sounds like the sort of movie I like to torture my hon with and looked it up, yes it sounded perfect. A couple of days later we sat down to watch it and it was just like it sounded, but in saying that I have to also say I was more amused and entertained by it than the last half dozen movies I've seen. The basic premise is into a flat\dorm full of adolescent male stoner\muscle man\surfer types a nerd is introduced, hijinks ensue, the difference is an evil bong that tries to kill the foursome by sucking their souls after a session. The acting was so so and the special effects what ones there were weren't that impressive but it was really funny in places and tommy chongs cameo at the end was worth the wait. So if you have a couple hours to kill and have had a big toke and want to lay back and veg watch this.

I left my wife because she didn't want to watch this movie. Truly a blessing.

Much like Gingerdead man, which I reviewed previously, one thing you CAN'T say about Evil Bong is that it uses false advertising. You get exactly what's offered to you in the title and advertising material.

That, however, doesn't necessarily make it good.

Granted, nobody watching a movie called Evil Bong goes into it expecting to see a cinematic masterpiece by any means. To be completely honest, I wasn't sure what to expect going into this movie.

It wasn't good by any stretch of the imagination, but it wasn't terrible. It tried to be funny in a lot of places where it just isn't, and it tried to have some slightly serious moments that came off as comedic because of the absurdity of it all. It was good enough to keep me watching until the end but, if I wasn't a completist, I'd have no desire to watch behind this first entry.

Give it a watch to satisfy your strange curiosities but don't expect much.