S.S. Doomtrooper

I think this is the most ridiculous movie ever. It was so bad you couldn't even laugh at it. Basic plot: mad German scientist makes a cross between Hulk and Juggernaut in a Wolfenstein/Top Secret(without the humour) setting. Extended plot: none!

I normally think that, even in the worst cases, someone tries to make a movie stick to the audience, either through emotional scenes, good ideas, acceptable special effects, good actors. But in this case, not one of these things happened. The CGI was worst ever, I mean the graphics in average video games are better. The dialogues were stunningly stupid. The actors had the most horrible fake accents and the acting was simply non existing.

I also believe this is a satanic movie. Played backwards, it might make some sort of sense. In a normal setting, though, it plain sucks! This is worst than even cult movies. They at least showed the desire to make a movie. This was... I don't know what it was. I am still in shock.

Another bag of Brain Fritos from the maestros of Grade Z cable television. A Nazi mad scientist (Cross) uses "atomic radiation" (as opposed to chocolate radiation) to turn a SS soldier into a mindless, invulnerable killing monster. Learning of Herr Krankendocktor's lab, the Americans recruit Captain America--er, Malloy (Nemic)--to assemble a team & go on an Alistair MacLean Mission to destroy the lab. Usually, when Heroes take on Mad Scientists in their Mad Labs, there's some mixture of action, suspense, tragedy, maybe even wonder or romance. Unfortunately, but as usual in Sci-Fi Channel Originals, the monster is revealed in the VERY FIRST SCENE, guaranteeing a complete absence of surprises. Nevertheless this film is outstanding in a few ways, not all good by any means. Nemic & a few others are better actors than this turkey deserves and they occasionally get it aloft for a few minutes. The special effects are cheap but mostly well done, a fine but somewhat wasted quality of most Sci-Fi productions, considering the lame scripts. What makes "Doomtrooper" interesting is how astonishingly bad it is in so many ways, especially its unabashed--nay, determined--method of ripping off other films. The monster is an amalgamation of the Hulk, Godzilla, "Resident Evil's" Nemesis & the Predator. The team is made up of attitudinal Army convicts, a "Dirty Half-Dozen," although some of its actors had better hope that John Cassevetes never finds them in the afterlife. Cross may have the dubious distinction of being the first actor to emulate Bela Lugosi's Ed Wood period (Lugosi's accent was more convincing). Trivia buffs, watch this with friends & see who can accurately pinpoint the most ripoffs. Then watch it again & see who can point out the most factual errors--there are so many that it's pointless to even begin to list them here. I still can't believe that Sci-Fi bailed on the last season of "Farscape" yet still pushes these embarrassing "originals" that are a letdown on every level (there isn't even any sex, the one easy exploitation that has a chance of rescuing a lame science fiction story). Strange are the ways of cable television! But, if that's how it has to be, let's play along. How about some sequels called "Frankenfuhrer," or "Germanzilla," or maybe "Resident Nazi?" Or...not?

This is possibly one of the worst films I have ever been unfortunate enough to see.

Colin Nemec confirmed his placement as a "C List" actor with a truly wooden performance. The accents in this film were over done, this resulting in the already cheesy dialogue being laughable.

The special effects in this film comprised of poor pyrotechnics and even worse CGI effects. The creature was totally unbelievable, and didn't leave footprints in the snow, nor did it cast its own shadows.

The plot was tiresome and extremely predictable, and based very loosely on the genre of the FPS game Wolfenstein by ID Software (circa 1980).

All in all not worth watching AT ALL.

I'm almost open to the idea that this is fact a comedy, because quite possibly its worst acted, scripted and directed film I've seen in a long time.

Think "Aliens" meets "Band of Brothers" meets "Robocop" via the computer game "Return to Castle Wolfenstein".

I just love the total lack of any authenticity; snipers stood in the middle of the road; machine guns that never run short of ammo. Fantastic.

As for the Doomtrooper. Hey, all they have to do is shut down the Playstation 2 its been rendered from and they will be sorted. Boy, does it look terrible. As do all the CGI effects. I mean the matte of the sea, with the fortress in the background. Its just awful! I like the idea of hiding in a house with all the lights on and no curtains.

But worse of all. The most terrible thing in all of this. Ben Cross. Dear, dear me.

I'm used to a certain amount of cheese from "Sci-Fi Original" movies. I'm used to unreasonable premises, less than ILM-quality visual effects, and "mammoth" plot holes.

And yet I was STILL disappointed by "SS Doomtrooper." Most of my displeasure is reserved for the rendering of the Doomtrooper itself. If this had been the villain on a Playstation One game ten years ago, it would have been OK. In 2006, though, with the myriad of talented CG artists available, it's unforgivable.

Then there's the writing. From having a character named Parker Lewis (see Corin Nemec's filmography,) to the selectively deaf demolitions expert, to characters who can survive what should be fatal gunshots and never see the inside of a hospital, to having a villainous monster who can shrug off being shot point blank by a tank, yet can have a hand lopped off by a bayonet, the writing was bad. Just bad.

Corin Nemec and Ben Cross are MUCH better than this...