Bottoms Up

"Bottoms Up" definitely deserved it's fate. It's an unfunny mess.

Jason Mewes plays Owen, who is a bartender. His Dad's bar is about to close because of money problems. Then out of the blue, Owen sees there's a "King of The Bar" contest in California. He applies, but doesn't win, and now he needs to get the money fast. He meets Lisa Mancini (Hilton) and blackmails her to be popular.

It's a very stupid plot, with the choppiest editing I've seen in awhile. There's no buildup, or segue into scenes, There are plot holes and there is dialogue missing. And the "Golden Palace.Com" plug was the most shameless plug ever. "Hey man, I have an idea, let's win some money at Golden Palace.Com!" says one character.

Also why does Paris have blonde hair on the cover, but she's a brunette in the film? Jason Mewes was trying his hardest to breathe life into his character, but the script let him down. Paris Hilton was also trying... but not too hard though. She's basically playing herself. It's funny when other characters call her "A whore". Truth in jest perhaps? Let's not mince words: "Bottoms Up" is terrible.

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Bottoms up it's a very poor movie, not very funny, not creative, and poorly acted mainly by Paris Hilton, this girl should stay as far away from acting as possible, the references to her life throughout the movie are way too obvious to be funny. All of the characters are undeveloped and the edition is very poor as some of the cuts last way longer than they should, however Jason Mewes and Brian Hallisay are pretty good. Mewes has a not "jaja funny" character and he he does it fine, Hallisay it's OK as a pretty boy/stoner actor. Hopefully we'll be seeing them in other flicks, this one wont kill their careers cuz nobody saw it.

Ill recommend it only if you're a huge fan of the actors or if you're at your house all alone, with anything to do but stare at the your wall wondering why no one likes you.

I made two mistakes that I never intended to do ever again. Those two mistakes were:

[1] Completely forgotten to check IMDb before watching this film [2] Completely forgotten the fact that Miss Paris can never act !

And because of the mistakes, I have sat through an hour and a half watching this dull, boring and utter crap film. I never thought that I'd be reviewing film that Miss Paris acted in, but I think there is need to tell readers how bad this movie is. Whilst commenting on this film would not get me a Nobel prize, at least it'll save valuable time to those who listen to my advice not to watch this film.

A very poor rating of 1.9 out of 10 is a testament of how bad the film is. It shows that albeit some may find the movie to their liking, majority of the voters said that this movie is very bad ! So my advice is, pass this movie, and buy / rent some other titles instead.

Paris Hilton is...... Paris Hilton. No matter how many films she had starred in, or how many hours she had spend time in acting classes, the fact remains that she can never act. Experience does come in handy in other profession, but in acting, it's clear; One either have the talent, or one do not. Watching her wooden acting is so painful, and I hope she can quit acting, and find other better things to do instead. I think it is better if she becomes her dad's apprentice and learn her way in hotel business. She'll be a suitable heiress to her dad business.

So, a palatable score of 1 out of 10. To those who are involved in the production of this film, count yourselves lucky because I can't rate this film a zero.

This movie is awful! I would rather stab myself in the face for ten years with the blunt end of a pencil than have to sit through this awful, awful, awful, awful movie again. I can't believe I made it all the way through once. This movie was worse than watching a plate of dog poo for an hour and a half. I will set my TV on fire if anyone ever tries to watch this movie on it again. Paris Hilton was obviously sent from a horrible, cold planet of untalented heiresses who have billions of dollars they didn't earn and don't deserve, in order to destroy our planet by getting us to watch horrible, boring garbage like this until we all kill ourselves out of horrified boredom. Then they will move in and make earth shitty like their planet and continue making awful movies.

I recently rented out this film as an act to cover up all the boring lives me and my brain have had during the extended holidays, and this film, I hoped would cheer me up. Wrong.

I have seen more than enough films about people who want to do what this film does, and that was the first Mistake I made during my selection. The second one was, seeing Paris Hilton starring in it, because I've see, from House of Wax that she doesn't try hard to make her characters look well up on screen. The final mistake I made, was not checking on what critics had said.

Do not go rent this film because you will be disappointed.

1/10 (And that's being generous)